You know, occasionally over the years I've mentioned the steep decline in attendance in evangelical or Bible-believing churches across the culture. It's another reason to thank the Lord that up to this point that's not impacted us in the same way. But I do think it's important for us to know what's occurring, and more importantly to think about why. Recently, several articles have been published that highlight a surprising and particular aspect of that trend, that some women are leaving the church at a more rapid rate than men. Shane Morris made that point a few weeks ago in a blog on Breakpoint, Why Are Educated Women Leaving Church? And then the subtitle, Women Are Leaning Left and Bucking Mediating Institutions. Let me read a little bit from this blog this morning to introduce what we're going to be speaking about. He said, one of the oldest features of Christianity is its appeal among women. Women swelled the ranks of the early church as it reflected how Jesus had treated them. He talked to women in public. He defended them against accusers. He appeared to them first after his resurrection. All this at a time when women were widely treated as inferior to men. Today, however, women in America seem to be abandoning Christian observance more quickly than men. That's amazing when you just stop and think about that. Political scientist Ryan Burge, co-author of The Great De-Churching, recently shared survey data showing that college-educated men are now more likely to attend church weekly than college-educated women. In 2008, 36% of women with at least a four-year degree attended church weekly compared with 34% of men with a degree. By 2023, just 27% of college-educated women attended church weekly compared with 32% of men. Obviously, church attendance has declined significantly for both sexes. However, the drop among educated women is disproportionately high. And it coincides with the leftward lurch in how women identify politically. It's possible there's something about higher education itself that is radicalizing women politically and driving them away from the church. Really? Also, the decline of marriage has historically correlated with women adopting more progressive beliefs. Pew Research reported, and by the way, this is not a judgment, it's just a sociological observation. Pew Research reported last year that the share of 40-year-olds who have never been married is at a historic high and childbearing partly as a result is near a record low. Marriage and family are the most basic of all mediating institutions. Please just kind of lock onto that phrase. In society that form individuals and buffer them from the state. assuming you want to be buffered from the state. With these institutions in decline, it's inevitable that people, especially women, would look increasingly to the government for provision and protection and influence. Also, the rise of social media may play a role in women's exodus from church and toward progressivism. Women spend more time on social media than men. And don't send me emails about that, I'm just reading this little article. Women spend more time on social media than men regardless of age. A particular kind of social and political orthodoxy is ruthlessly enforced by mob rule on social media platforms. Anybody want to argue that one? Not only do influencers seek to shape the beliefs of their followers, they often promote alternative forms of spirituality and views of the good life. Now, please lock on to this. Whatever the causes are, leaving the church and becoming more progressive has not served women well. A 2023 survey by the Centers for Disease Control, that's the source here for this one, found that almost 60% of teenage girls reported feeling consistently sad or hopeless. That's an incredible statistic. And half of those seriously contemplated suicide. This represented a 20% increase in mental health problems among teen girls within a decade. Over the same period, teen boys saw a comparatively small but still alarming 8% increase in mental health issues. It seems likely then that the peace so many young women are looking for will be found on...that the peace so many young women are looking for will be found on tip-top or in left-wing politics. The God-shaped hole in every human heart becomes only more, not less, pronounced by rejecting organized religion. And this means, at least in part, that any outreach to educated young women must include an appeal to tradition, to marriage, and to life beyond social media, as well as countering the counterfeits. It should also, as always, include appealing to our Savior whose high view and treatment of women have brought so many to see His church as a place of countercultural hope. Now, I think this trend ought to cause a church like ours to do some real soul searching. I believe that. Maybe the problem is that men have not done a good job of living out our biblical role, and therefore it's not as attractive to women as it once was. Or maybe women or men don't have an interest in what God's Word has to say about these matters, especially when it contradicts what the world around us believes. So here's my question to you, what should a congregation like us do with this reality? Is the answer to stop teaching what Scripture says on these topics because of the risk of alienating someone or turning them off? And feel free, just answer right out loud if you'd like. Generally, outlied answers are accompanied with a piece of banana cream pie. But anyway, anyway, I don't... Well, so is the solution teaching less of what Scripture says? And what would be the impact on our ability to accomplish our mission if that's what we did? Before he died, Tim Keller, the longtime pastor of Redeemer Presbyterian Church in New York City, was asked about how Christians interact with culture on topics like this. Now, you might want to sit back because you're possibly not going to like all of this, okay? Here's what he said, most Christians are just nowhere nearly as deeply immersed in the Scripture and in theology. Now, that's the part I want you to really lock onto, as they are in their respective social media bubbles and newsfeed bubbles. To be honest, I think the woke evangelicals are just much more influenced by MSNBC and liberal Twitter. If you say, I like that one, well, sit back. The conservative Christians are much more influenced by Fox News and their particular loops. And they're both living in those things 8 to 10 hours a day. They go to church once a week. And they're just not as immersed in the kind of biblical theological study. Again, that's the point that would nuance that stuff. In other words, at least in Keller's view, the answer isn't less biblical truth, it's more. And then he went on to talk about how that would help us accomplish our mission in the culture. And he contrasted two groups of people, those who want to abandon culture out of fear on one hand, or those who want to take over culture out of anger on the other. And he said this, both those evangelical strategies are wrong. Both of them are about power and saying, how are we going to use power to live life the way we want? They're not enough about service or not enough about serving the common good. The proper cultural strategy is faithful presence within. I would really encourage you to note that phrase. Faithful presence within, he added, not pulling away from the culture and not trying to take it over. Faithful presence within means being faithful, that is, faithful to what the Word of God says on topics like the ones we're going to talk about today. Faithful presence within means being faithful. It means we're not going to assimilate, but we're going to be distinctively Christian. There it is again. It's about an attitude of service, uncompromising in our beliefs, but not withdrawing and not trying to dominate. So here's now my question for you. What does it look like to be deeply immersed in the Scripture when it comes to the matter of the role of the husband and the role of the wife and to live that faithfully in the culture in which we've been placed? With that in mind, please open your Bible to Ephesians chapter 5. Ephesians chapter 5, that's on page 152 of the back section of the Bible under the chair in front of you. So Ephesians chapter 5 or page 152 of the back section of the Bible under the chair in front of you. Our theme this year is building on our heritage. And so we've been studying verse by verse through this wonderful book of Ephesians together. And now we're at the end of chapter 5. and the beginning of chapter 6 where Paul gives very specific and practical teaching about the Christian family. So we've titled this particular section, Strengthening Unity in Our Relationships. And, you know, let's just face this, nobody knows for sure what's going to happen to a church like ours that continues to teach principles like these. We don't know the impact that's going to have. But let me remind you of this, we're not pragmatists. Meaning we don't make decisions on the basis of what we believe might be the temporal results. We do what we do because we believe it pleases God. And then we'll trust, this is His church, right? So we're going to trust Him for the results. That brings us to a study of the husband's role in marriage. Ephesians 5, let's start with verse 21. And be subject to one another in the fear of Christ. Wives, be subject to your own husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the Word, that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she would be holy and blameless. So husbands ought also to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself, for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it just as Christ also does the church because we're members of his body. For this reason, a man shall leave his father and mother and shall be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh." This mystery is great. But I'm speaking with reference to Christ and the church. Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband. We're looking for three aspects of a biblical husband's role. And I can hear somebody who may not be familiar with the Scripture say, well, you know, you just answered your own question, Bob. I mean, it's passages like that that's going to motivate women to leave the church. Look how favorably men were treated in those verses. Well, I would say this about that. Understood properly, the instructions laid out here are equally challenging. to women and to men, and there's plenty of people here who would say that allowing Jesus Christ to give them the strength and the power to understand and follow His Word on topics like this, that that's made all the difference in the world, in their lives and in their marriages. So we're going to do something a little bit different today. I've asked three couples who have been longtime members of our church to talk to us about each of these three aspects of a husband's role and specifically how that has guided them. And we're doing that this morning for a couple of reasons. One is on the occasion of our 60th anniversary, it just allows you to be acquainted with more of our long-term members, and I think that's important. But it's also an opportunity for all of us to thank the Lord for His timeless Word. Now think about what I just read and what should be the church of Jesus Christ's response to what I just read. Thank You, Lord, for Your Word. Thank You, Lord, for Your Word. And listen, I understand not everybody in this community would accept what I just read and would instead seek other sources of truth. But I believe the three testimonies that you're going to hear this morning will remind us, as Peter said, quoting Acts 40, for all flesh is like grass and all its glory like the flower of grass. But do you believe this? The grass withers and the flower falls off, but the Word of the Lord does what? It endures forever. This is the word which was preached to you. Wise men and women build their lives and their relationships on truth like this." So three aspects of a husband's biblical role. Well, if we're going to be honest with the text, we have to start here. Glorify God by leading his wife. It's very apparent from this and many other passages in the Word of God that God gave men leadership responsibilities. And friends, I'd just like to suggest to you that that ought to bring everybody great relief, at least in this sense. If you've ever been in a situation where nobody was leading and leadership was clearly necessary, it's chaos. It's frustrating. I mean, think back. Just all the different places you've been in the last week, or maybe the places that you might go today, it's likely that in practically every one of them there had to be some kind of leadership. So if you're going to stop by the Meyer later on today, anybody here sometimes do that? Yeah, I could do church visitation at that place, but I could be the greeter and the pastor of this church simultaneously. But anyway, anyway. Aren't you glad somebody's leading that place down there? I mean, if the cashiers just said, ah, we're going to take a break. We'll be back when we want to. I mean, that'd be a bad thing. The stockers last night said, you know, I'm just too tired to stock them shelves. I'm just going to lay around on this floor. I mean, I'm glad somebody's leading down at the mire. And then if you go to a restaurant, are you glad that somebody's going to be leading? It's just amazing. Just think about all the different... Well, I did. I stopped at Dunkin' Donuts. Somebody's leading the Dunkin' Donuts charge, and God bless them. I mean, somebody needs to be leading. And I don't know about you, I like it when somebody else is leading. So, for example, our grandsons are in a soccer league this fall. Here's my role. I show up. That's what I do. Somebody else made the schedule. God bless them. Somebody else recruited the coaches. Somebody else made the rules. Somebody else mowed the grass. You couldn't have a soccer league unless somebody was leading it. Now, you might say, well, why did God decide the husband should be the leader? Can we just pause and say this? Even if we didn't know the answer to that, we'd still be obligated to obey. So even if we didn't know the answer to a question like that, I'm fairly certain God doesn't have to explain Himself to us. Did you know God's not in an election this fall? He's not, so he doesn't have to change his positions to make the electorate happy. We all got that straight? And that wasn't an attack on any one person. That's all of them. But anyway, I got off track there for a minute. Let me get back to leading this sermon. Scripture says He created Adam first. And you might say, well, so? Apparently, this is very important to the Lord. Because the order of creation comes up when discussing roles in the church. Here we go. 1 Timothy 2.12, And by the way, you might say, I don't like that verse. Well, can I just tell you something? I'm not sure I like it either. How's that? But you've heard me quote my theology professor back at Grace Seminary, John Whitcomb. He was a graduate of Princeton. He was brilliant. And he used to say in class, Hark! Do I hear a voice from the third heaven saying, Who cares what you like? We do what the Word of God says. He declared the husband to be the leader in the home. The husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. Now here's what's so very, very important here, applying and understanding the as Christ also is. Can I encourage you to underline that in your Bible or underline that in your mind as Christ also is? You know, I've never heard a man or a woman complain or be troubled that Jesus is the head of the church. Well, why is that? Well, it's because Christ-like leadership is servant leadership. And we don't have time to completely unpack this particular passage this morning, but aren't you glad? So whatever we think about leadership has to be able to bear the weight of this. But Jesus called them to Himself and said, you know that the rulers are the Gentiles. Here's what they're like, unbelieving people. They lord it over them. And the great men exercise authority over them. It's not this way among you. But whoever wishes to become great among you shall be your servant. Whoever wishes to be first among you shall be your slave. Just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve and to give his life a ransom for many." That means biblical leadership can't be dictatorship. We're talking about husbands looking for ways to serve. and husbands looking for needs to meet. But in any relationship, somebody, this is the way Pastor Good used to say it, somebody has to have the ax over his neck, meaning if there's an impasse, somebody has to be able to make the final call and therefore biblical leadership is service and it's sacrifice. And I'll tell you this, for every one wife I've ever heard say that she felt her husband's leadership was dictatorial, I've had 10 say, I just wish my husband would lead. So what does that look like? I mean, what does it look like with skin on? Well, please listen to dear members of this church, Chester and Betty Bankas. Chester and I were married in Pennsylvania. That's where we both were born and grew up. We had a church wedding. Family, friends, and church members were invited. Our pastor must have been a little extra eager when he saw some of the people in the congregation. We were glad he saw it as an opportunity to present the gospel, but he forgot to charge Chester. Yes, the pastor was so excited that he forgot to tell me what my marriage responsibilities were during the wedding ceremony. He may have been distracted by the people in the crowd, However, there was something else distracting him too, and he mentioned it. He said, talking about me, that this young man seems to have a little trouble smiling today. It's funny what we remember about our wedding. Before we go further, I want you all to know that if I had to do it over again, I would be smiling from ear to ear with the biggest grin ever when getting married to my wonderful wife and friend, Betty. What in the world was I thinking? My mother and father divorced when I was 18. I remember what that was like when it was announced. My emotional response reflected a loss of hope. Viewing the relationship between Betty's parents didn't provide hope either. Their relationship was dysfunctional and not one that others would want to follow. In 1981, when we got married, in our society approximately 50% of first marriages entered into divorce. I didn't want our marriage to be one of those statistics. I was pondering what that meant to me and the seriousness of my commitment. In 1982, the economy was out of control and Chester became unemployed. However, he was fortunate to have an employer that invited us to Lafayette in 1983. We started attending Faith in that year. Well, it seems like just yesterday that Betty and I were in the young marriage class here at Faith. And I was attending Metta Faith for the first time. We were young, 27, and we were expecting our first child. We were both recognizing that teaching that we were getting here at Faith was biblical and very practical also. When I went to Metta Faith, I heard things that I don't recall hearing before. That as husbands, we were to be learners, lovers, and leaders. There were three scriptures that were used to support that statement. Learner, 1 Peter 3.7. You husbands, in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way as with someone weaker, since she is woman, and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered. Lover, Ephesians 5.25. Husbands, love your wife as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her. Leader, Ephesians 5.23. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church. The natural man's view of being a leader is, I get to tell others what to do. I get to be the boss. I get to have the premier position in the family. Being a leader sounds like an advantaged idea, a sought after position. Well, the teachings of men of faith didn't let the world's view of being a leader be the model that we should follow. Mark 10, 41 to 45 are also verses that we were taught about at men of faith. If I can paraphrase the scripture, it says that If we want to be the first, a leader, we are not to be exercised in authority over people, but rather become a servant of all. When we consider Ephesians 5.25, where it says that we as husbands are to love our wife as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her, that also changed my view of what a leader should be. How many leaders did I see sacrificing for others? It usually seems the other way around. In 1 Peter 3, 7, it talks about giving honor to your wife as the weaker vessel. Well, I didn't understand that at first. Who honors something weak? Well, it's talking about treating her as someone that is precious, like someone may treat a special thin-walled piece of the finest china. Being a young man, especially with a natural tendency to sin, It made me think quite a bit as I was trying to bring these principles into a unified framework. It made me see that there was a duty and a responsibility with being a leader also. As a young father, I had the opportunity to learn about being a leader. When I think back about some of the life events that stick out where I had to be a leader, it was asking forgiveness. Children and disobedience somehow seemed to go hand in hand. So I was grappling with the situation I can't remember the specifics any longer. I think I might have falsely accused one of my children of something they didn't do. If it was to be a leader, one leading the family in the right direction, then I had to ask forgiveness and model it properly to be a leader. I couldn't sweep it under the rug and feed my pride. I couldn't minimize it, so I didn't need to deal with it. I needed to ask forgiveness according to John 1.9. Asking forgiveness in the parent-child relationship was one thing. Asking forgiveness in the husband-wife relationship was another thing that I had to grow at also. I also remember a time when I had another epiphany, a moment that jarred me into reality. It was a time, and I can't remember the specifics, when my wife expected me to be the leader and put me into that position. And I thought, oh, I really have to lead. And this means that I have to do something that I had to spend some time and effort to try to get it right for the whole family. Trying to remember what it was, it could have been agreeing on a form of discipline for the children. It could have been how much money to spend on Christmas. It could have been requesting some input on how to handle which one of the children got to sit in the front seat when one mom was driving him here and there. I can't remember the specific. I just remember that she was graciously helping me to take on the responsibility. In that specific instance, it helped me to see that I had to do some learning, especially from her and from God's Word, to be able to lend some help in how to move forward. There are many other instances too, too many for me to remember them all. Well, where I had the opportunity to lead, reading the Bible, devotions for the family, returning good for evil, confessing sin, resisting pride and being humble instead, teaching the children, discipline for the children, loving my wife, remembering her birthday, and many other instances. Some I hit with the home run, with some I failed at. God was gracious and so was Betty. God's Word is essential in helping me to lead biblically. You know, what a beautiful picture of 1 Peter 1, 24 and 25. The grass withers and the flower fades, but the Word of our God stands forever. And I think the practical questions become clear, don't they, husbands? Are you leading your wife even when it's hard? And wives, are you making it possible for your husband to fulfill that responsibility as easily as he can? Now secondly, glorify God by leading His wife. This too is emphasized in the passage at a level I believe ought to give every one of us husbands real pause. Husbands, love your wives just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her. There's not a man in this room who would say that we've got that one mastered. And didn't you appreciate Chester's humility, by the way? That should be true for all of us. And, you know, when you step back here, there are reasons why of everything that could be said about marriage, these particular areas are especially emphasized. Why? And you may not like me saying this, but here you go. Women struggle following the leadership they're given. And if that's not true in your particular case, then praise the Lord. Men struggle with either not leading or doing it in a way that is selfish, which is why it's so important to remember biblical love is a choice to give. And for God so loved the world, John 3, 16, we know that verse, for God so loved the world that He gave, I think it would be wise for many of us, if not all husbands, to spend time this weekend meditating on the cross work of Jesus Christ and that comparing that to our love for our wives, I think we'll find that to be terribly convicting. But, you know, Paul says there's a kind of love that comes from God that will never fail. We're never going to find the strength in and of ourselves to do this. What an incredible promise. So when we think about it then, biblical love looks like what? Well, if it's like Christ's love, then it has to be first. We love Him because He first loved us. I can close my eyes and hear Pastor Goodes saying about a man who complained that his home wasn't a very loving place. Well, then you better get with it. And we're to love first, and we're to love most. Greater love has no man than this. It's not 50-50. Can you imagine if Christ's love for us was conditioned by our love for Him? We're to love most. We're to love, as we've said, sacrificially. Husbands, can you point to areas of sacrifice for your wife and your family? And are there specific steps that could and should be taken in that direction? in spite of faults, but God commended His love toward us, and that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us, and regardless of rejection. You might want to think about this. Did you place your faith and trust in Christ the very first time you learned of His love? Probably not. For many of us, we did what? We rejected Him, and we rejected Him, and we rejected Him, and what did He choose to do anyway? He continued to love us. You know, we had a beautiful picture of that with the Hessler family. We had Dorothy Hessler's funeral this week, a dear member of this church, and Dorothy was 63 years old. She was diagnosed with cancer last December, just right before Christmas. And as that disease progressed, Tom and Jenna and Jessica, their daughters, and Jenna's husband, Adam, had to decide how were they going to provide care. And I'm not saying that everybody can do this, and I'm not saying that everybody should do this, but they chose to provide that care right there in their home. And so Adam encouraged Jenna, let's move back in with mom and dad so we can be part of the round the clock care team for mom as she continues to decline. And as our church family watched all of that unfold, it was really a beautiful, beautiful picture of Christ-like love. And you know, Tom and Dorothy, they were the first wedding that was performed in our new auditorium here. They were married in 1986, right here. And I wasn't here, that was before my time. But think about the typical wedding vows that are said, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, till death do us part. And it's a beautiful thing to see that happen among the brothers and sisters of Christ in this church. I'd like you to listen now to how this concept of being loving has guided Jeff and Lori Walters. We're Jeff and Lori Walters, and we've been members of faith for 39 years. In fact, our first Sunday at faith was three weeks after we were married. It was the pig roast Sunday, or commonly known now as the community picnic. Talk about great timing. I was immediately excited that I'd found a church that would challenge us from the Word of God. When Pastor Vires asked me to speak on the role of a husband being a lover, I certainly didn't feel adequate. But remembering that if I've had any success in fulfilling this role, it's because of God's grace in our lives, and we should be eager to show our works of our lives to the praise of His glory. I'll let you in on something. I was quite a bit slower in thinking faith was to be our church home. But I am so thankful for Jeff's leadership in us deciding to join faith. As you'll see as we share with you, all the roles God asks a husband to fulfill, leader, learner, and lover, are incredibly intertwined. As we've been taught faithfully from Ephesians 5, to be a lover that God has commanded me to be, I need to love Lori sacrificially as Christ loved the church. I distinctly remember being taught over the years here at Faith that I should come home to serve rather than to be served. That was something concrete that I could understand and try to apply. For example, when our kids were young, Jeff would get them ready for bed every night and help them get ready for the day every morning. What makes this even more notable was that Jeff worked the night shift. He'd get the kids ready for bed before he went to work, and then when he came home from work, he'd get busy with breakfasts and getting them dressed. As they got older, he routinely did their Bible lesson before he'd go to bed after working all night. In fact, he still works that shift because we think it offers the best schedule for our family and his church involvement. Over 36 years on this shift hasn't been particularly easy for him, but to have your husband serve you and the people you love most in the world made me feel cherished. To love Lori well, I needed to nourish her, as Ephesians 5.29 explains. That's how Christ treats the church. If you're around my wife for any length of time, you'll probably hear her say, I've got a brain storm or an idea. And she's dreamed up some pretty scary things. In addition, the Holy Spirit has gifted her to serve the church, and I need to encourage and enable her to do that. There have been many ways I've wanted to serve in the church or community, which have not necessarily been in Jeff's comfort zone. But with his consistent and strong support, I've been encouraged to serve and grow in my gifts. He's also been so good about helping me look at my God-given priorities and not become overcommitted, even with worthwhile things. Through the various seasons of life, Lori's God-given responsibilities and thus priorities have changed. I can love her well by encouraging her to fulfill those responsibilities and by looking for ways that I can make it easier for her to do that. For the last eight years, my mother had some significant health issues. She'd come stay at our house every other month for a week and have several doctor's visits. Then, beginning in March of 2023, it became apparent that she needed 24-7 care. So, for the last nine months of her life, I spent part of every other week in southern Indiana helping provide that care. Then, after she passed away, this schedule continued for another five and a half months while my sister and I emptied the family home. There was never even a hint of a complaint from Jeff. It was such a blessing to be able to honor my mother well until the end. To love Lori well, I've needed to learn what it feels like to love her. From First Peter 3-7, I have taught that we need to... What does it feel to love me, dear? It's hard. Oh, boy. Ready? No, I got the giggles now. Okay. To love Lori, well, I've also needed to learn what it feels like love to her. From 1 Peter 3.7, I've been taught that I need to learn Lori. That lets me love her well. Lori isn't one who necessarily appreciates flowers and romantic dinners. Rather, she appreciates us doing things together. and getting things done. Honey-do lists, projects around the house, etc. are ways to show her love. That doesn't let some of you husbands who wives do like more romantic gestures off the hook though. Jeff knows me well and gives me a hug when I need it and I don't even know that I need it. Or laughs at me in the nicest way possible when I'm being ridiculous. I can be way too serious way too often. He has been long suffering and learning me well. We are very thankful for the biblical teaching that we've received here at Faith over the years. My prayer is that I will finish well in the role of husband to Lori, and that we both give a good account for how we have stewarded this gift of marriage. You know, I realize that many in our community, if they heard the verses that I read this morning, They would be very, very critical about that. But I would just encourage you to think about Chester and Betty. Think about Jeff and Lori. Think about 1 Peter 2, at the risk of sounding redundant, the grass withers and the flower fades. But what? The Word of our God stands forever. Now, for any man who would say, wow, this is hard. Well, we actually haven't gotten to the hard part yet. And we always have to remember the unity principle, Scripture interprets Scripture. And so we have to also acknowledge that we're to glorify God by learning about and honoring our wives. One of the most challenging It's actually been mentioned by those who have given testimony already. It's very clear a husband is commanded to learn about his wife. And no husband can throw up his arm and say, well, that's impossible. We can't do that with any of God's commands, which is why for what we're talking about today and what we'll talk about with the wife's role, it ought to encourage all of us to run to the throne of grace. And by the way, if you don't know that you know that you know that you're on your way to heaven, that you have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, this would be a great topic, whether you're married or not, just to remind us of our need of a Savior. And if you don't know Him, as Lord and Savior, we would encourage you to make that decision. It's a command that includes being mindful of her weaknesses. And you have to decide what you're going to do with that phrase, as with someone weaker. I think we have to be careful there. I don't know about you, I've seen a lot more women pushing their husbands' wheelchairs than the other way around. But it has to mean something and it ought to result in sensitivity and it ought to result in patience. And then Peter says a husband is commanded to honor his wife, respect, thankfulness, appreciation. And we men would be wise just to stop and ask ourselves, what could we start doing or stop doing to live more in line with this concept? And I hope...I hope this, as you're listening to this, I hope you would say, you know, I do see what you said at the beginning is true. This is equally challenging for both men and for women. And you can imagine how this would have impacted the first century world. Where ideas like this were practically unheard of. No wonder women flocked to the early church honoring her because she shares the same inheritance. Peter said, a fellow heir of the grace of life. And then even a warning. The prayers of those who refuse these commands. Who would want to be in a situation where my prayer would be hindered? These three key words, learner, lover, and leader, that they've guided so many. Now, lastly, please listen to Jeff and Jana Kessler. When Jana and I were married in May of 1977, we started attending Faith Baptist Church on South 18th Street. Pastor Bill Good was not only our senior pastor, but he was also our Sunday school teacher. We had a lot of young marriages at church during that time. And Pastor Good loved to teach from the book of Ephesians. Ephesians chapter 5. Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her. As a young husband, I did not know what that meant, but I wanted to learn what that meant. I wanted to learn more about God's word and learn how to love Jana better. observing and listening to her better. She was not only my wife, but she was and is my best friend. I knew and believed that being a better learner in God's Word would help me be a better husband, have a more godly marriage. At that time in life, I also had a communication problem. I would clam up when things did not go my way. Then we were taught the four rules of communication. Being honest, staying current, attacking the problem and not the person, and act and don't react. I failed miserably at principle number two. God had inspired through his word how to communicate. I needed to put off some old habits, as in Ephesians 4.22, and put on some new habits. I had much to learn. As Jeff's wife, I have appreciated his desire to be a learner of God's Word. He has been in men's Bible study for over 25 years, has also attended classes on Wednesday nights, and has attended ABFs during our time at Faith. On most mornings, I find him in his personal Bible study and prayer time. He is a diligent student of God's Word. And what a blessing it is to have a church that gives us so many opportunities to learn and to grow. It is also a blessing to have so many godly examples in our lives to listen to and to observe. Learning doesn't only come from church services and classes. Jeff applies what he has learned in traditional ways, but also uses what he has learned by the examples set by others. Knowledge alone without actions serves little purpose. During our second year of marriage, I was hired to teach and work in two very time-consuming extracurricular activities. After a couple of years, the schedule was taking a toll on our marriage. I am so thankful that Jeff was wise enough to know, through what we were taught at church, that I needed to make some changes in my workload or our marriage wouldn't survive. At that time, Jeff was starting a new business, and my salary was the only income we had. If I would no longer take the extra work assignments, there was a risk that I would lose my job, lose our only income, and I left the work. But our marriage was far more important. My employers altered my schedule. God was faithful, as always. I kept my job for 34 years, and we've been married for over 47. Having a husband who is a dedicated learner of God's Word and applies what he learns doesn't mean that life will be without trials or that Jeff will always do the right thing or make the right decision. It does mean that God will give us strength and direction during those trials. As Paul wrote in Philippians 3.13, I have not yet apprehended. We too have not yet apprehended. We are still learning, growing, but know and believe that regardless of the season in life, God is too loving to be unkind and too wise to make a mistake. His grace, mercy, and love is sufficient for us. Well, you know, we started this morning with an article, Why Are Educated Women Leaving the Church? And it could be. It could be because we men are not doing a very good job at fulfilling our roles. Or it could be women not wanting to hear what God's Word has to say. But as was shouted out earlier, the answer can't be, well, stop teaching what Scripture says on these matters. I think our culture needs more followers of Christ like Chester and Betty, and Jeff and Lori, and Jeff and Jana, all who would be very quick to say they're far from perfect. But they long ago decided what their source of truth was going to be. Why? Because they're convinced the grass withers and the flower fades. But the Word of our God, including Ephesians chapter 5, it stands forever. Let's pray together, shall we? Father in heaven, Lord, we find all of this very, very convicting. And so, Lord, whether we're single, married, regardless of what our life situation is, I pray that we would be the kind of people who would say, I want to follow the Word of God, it's my hope and it points me to my wonderful Savior. And so, Lord, for the ways in which we're living in a way that's consistent with what we're studying, we praise You. For the ways that we need to get better, quoting Pastor Good, help us to get with it. And Lord, thank you that Jesus Christ stands ready to help us. We pray these things in His name.