I would draw your attention to Ephesians chapter 6. We will begin to look at a new chapter, the final chapter here in Ephesians. Ephesians chapter 6, we will read verse 1 through 4. Children, obey your parents in the Lord, For this is right. Honor your father and mother. This is the first commandment with a promise that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land. Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. Let's pray. Our gracious Lord and heavenly Father, we have need of grace this morning. Lord, we are thankful that we have the promise, that we have grace when we have a time of need. And Lord, we always need grace when we go to Your Word. Lord, we acknowledge in humility Your omniscience, Your wisdom. Lord, how transcendent is Your wisdom to declare to us what is right, what is wrong, Lord, what is holy in Your eyes and what is debased in Your eyes. And Lord, we ask for help this morning as we go to Your Word, seeking Your wisdom. Lord, seeking to understand and discern what it is that You would have for us in these words that were inspired by the Holy Spirit to be written by the Apostle Paul for us this morning. Lord, we thank You and we praise You. We pray that You would accept our worship here this morning. In Your name we pray. Amen. As I was studying this section of Scripture in preparation for this morning, and in particular the portion regarding children and fathers here, I've been studying this passage as a whole. You really can't separate Chapter 5, verse 22, from everything that proceeds from that all the way down to verse 9 of chapter 6, it all fits together. It's very hard to separate in the study of these things, these portions of Scripture out, but we do have certain headings that help us, and this in particular that we're going to look at this morning is children and parents, or children and fathers in particular. I couldn't help but make some contrast in my mind as I was thinking about these things with the way in which we parent today. I fear that we've fallen, fall shores, fallen very, very short, far short of what we should be parenting as in accordance with what the scripture gives us here today. may bring out, we'll bring out a little bit more of this as we go through this morning, but I want us to consider for a moment where we are as parents in the day that we live regarding discipline and instruction for our Children. And what I want to say here this morning is not just for them out there, those who aren't sitting in a church building this morning or aren't sitting here with us, but it's also for us, and it's definitely for me. Um, Raising kids as a parent is a difficult thing. And it's an absolute and utter struggle if you do things according to the world. It's an absolute and unbelievable struggle and an impossibility if you do it according to the world and according to what the world says is important and right. The world would have us, as parents, raise, discipline, teach, instruct, nurture, educate our kids in a way that says that you have to let the kids dictate or lead according to their spirit. Let them live according to their passions and what they desire. What has this led to? Glad you asked. What has this led to? It's led to parents putting themselves in obedience to their children. That is a sad state of affairs. It's the exact opposite of what the Holy Spirit teaches us in the Word of God. And it's become a constant and moving target as the world redefines what's important and what's right in parenting. And it's become this unmovable target and it's this evolving life to do that which is not acceptable to God. That which is not in accordance to the word of God. Think about things for just a moment and see if what I'm telling you is an accurate portrayal of modern parenting. We've gone over the last, we'll say 75, 80 years, from a compulsory education system, where education resulting from that compulsory method of teaching, which produced well-balanced, capable children, able to understand, to rationalize, to logically, critically think about things, and is morphed into a system where we have some of the lowest test scores that we've ever seen. I'm not even talking in terms yet of Christian things. I'm just talking about education in general. So what do we do then? When we see these low test scores, what do we do? You that have been teachers, what do we do? We lower the standards. What kind of answer to the problem is that? We lower the standards. Speaking of the ideology, the method behind the education, the instruction and the discipline of children today. I believe these things occurred as the influence of a Judeo-Christian foundation started to wane in the world. What has replaced that, I stated just a moment ago, but what has replaced this is the ideology to gear our whole lives as parents around the passion of our children, what the child wants and what the nature of the child demands. Now, I don't want you to think, and please don't think that I don't mean that there aren't different ways that we should be teaching children. According to the way, there are some that are better auditory learners. Some are better visual. Some understand tactile things. Some have to be shown. Some can read. I'm not talking about those things. What I'm saying is that we're building a whole foundation for discipline and instruction to children on sinking sand. That's what we're doing. We have sacrificed everything to meet the child where they are according to their nature. But you see, there's a foundational problem with that. Their nature, the nature of a child is foul. It's polluted. It is sinful. It is dead to God. And it's opposed to everything that is that soul, that nature's greatest need in life. Children must not be left to rule over their parents. They must not be left to their own devices, their own passions and desires. Those desires come from a heart that is dead to God. So what do we do? What do we do? We've altered everything in our lives to give the children their desires which spring from a dead heart. Now I'm going to speak in terms of professing Christians. We give up family worship every night to go to practice for a game. For a game. Guilty. For a game. Giving up that which our child desperately needs to something that is a game that has no eternal value. We give up church on Sunday to go to the lake, to go to these games, to give the child the desires of their heart when their heart is wicked and at enmity with God. We give up instruction and teaching which leads to Christ and to the awakening of the soul so that they can learn to defend themselves or learn to play a sport to give them trophies, or any manner of other things that we spend all of our waking time as worldly parents doing for our worldly children. I'm not saying that some of these things aren't good. There are some great things that came out of my children playing sports, some great things that they learned, but we devoted way too much time to it. Way too much. And neglected those things that are of utmost importance. I'm not saying that these things aren't helpful. But what I am going to tell you is that none of these things will reconcile your child to God. Not one of them. What Paul is getting us to see here in this passage that we're looking at is not primarily or even outwardly writing to us concerning things that will just transform a society. He's not even going to that scope. I would argue that these things do transform a society, but that's not Paul's purpose in what he is speaking to us here today. What he is exhorting us or commanding us as Christians to do is to be faithful to the desires, not of our children, but to the desires of our Heavenly Father. Children are to be obedient to their Father. We as Christians are to be obedient to our Heavenly Father, and this is what is detailed for us, is the desire of our Heavenly Father. His concern is not what helps us fit into the world. We don't belong to this world. Why are we concerned with fitting in with this world? He's not charging us to do things to be at peace with the world and how the world does things. Paul cares more for his listeners than that. It's as if he is saying, to us directly what Christ has already said. Think about this for a second in the context of what we read from Paul and what we are seeing from Paul as he goes through this exhortation to wives and husbands, children and parents, bondservants or slaves and masters, but especially concerning the parents and their children. How children are to obey and parents are to discipline and instruct, not according to what the desire of your child is, not what the child wants, but instead teach your child to deny himself and to follow Christ. Christ says in Mark, Mark chapter 8, 34 through 36, and calling the crowd to him with his disciples, he said to them, if anyone would come after me, let him deny himself. and take up His cross and follow Me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake and the Gospels will save it. For what does it profit a man if he gain the whole world and forfeits his soul?" We don't give our child what are the desires of his sinful heart. We teach him to deny his sinful heart, his sinful passions, the lusts of the flesh, and follow Jesus Christ. From what Christ said there in Mark, we must have it in our mind not to teach our child to gain the world. Because your child is going to die. And after that comes the judgment. It won't matter how your child, how high they reach on the corporate ladder, how much money is in their bank account, how they rose to heights of popularity, how big their house was or how many cars they drove. That's all going to fade away. That's all going to be burned up. But their soul, oh my, their undying soul, What does it profit if your child gains the whole world and forfeits their soul? I fear we're far too concerned today with our children getting a trophy than we are our children receiving the crown of life. Everything in our society is completely backwards. Everything. So where do we turn to find the right way? We turn where we've always turned. We turn to Scripture. We turn to God's Word. So let's see this morning what God has for us as we see in this epistle, chapter 6 of the epistle to the Ephesians. Ephesians 6-1 tells us, Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. I want to make an observation or two here I think will help us as we look at this passage. I think the first thing is that Paul, in his letter, addresses directly the children. Directly addresses them. This would, I think, without stretching anything at all, logically lead us to understand that there were children present when this epistle was read in Ephesus to the local bodies there. Churches today have taken children and removed them from the worship service. I don't mean by that the singing of hymns. I mean the preaching of God's Word. That is the worship service. And they've removed them from that. William Hendrickson in his commentary even states that Paul would be shocked to enter into a modern church today and see that children are leaving after Sunday school. Paul had the expectation when he wrote this epistle to the Ephesians that children would be present and among those who listened to it being read. And Paul also, Paul by inspiration of the Holy Spirit, follows a pattern here that is first shown to us in the passage regarding husbands and wives, and will show us again in the passage dealing with slaves and masters, or bondservants and masters. In verse 22 of chapter 5, he says, wives submit to your own husbands as to the Lord. Here in our text this morning, children obey your parents in the Lord. And then if you look down in verse 5 of chapter 6, All of these share the idea that the submission that is given to these three groups is to be done in a way that is part of, included in, and to be done in accordance with their submission to Christ. I don't think we need to go real deeply into this. We talked about this, I believe it was last week. So we won't go deeply into this. But it's interesting that three times over, we are led back to this, that the submission is to be done as to the Lord, in the Lord, and as you would Christ. I believe that this brings about great weight in this area. It's not just that these things are to be done because they are what works best. But these things, this submission, is to be done because this is in accordance with the plan and the wisdom and the purpose of Almighty God. And it's given to us as a pattern that speaks to us, we've talked about this in great detail also before, a pattern that speaks to us of salvation and to the ultimate example of Jesus Christ Himself. This points out to us that what is really good for us does not flow out of society or what man's ideas are, but what the Creator and the Sustainer of all things says is good and right and good for us. That which is good and right and true and beneficial and lasting is that which is biblical. Ian Hamilton states it like this in reference to the principle laid out here as fundamental truth in these passages. The Bible, he says, however, tells us that our best interests in present as well as future happiness depend on us following the wisdom of our Creator, the God who so loved the world that He gave us His only begotten Son. We don't look to a myriad of secular books on parenting and schemes of child rearing from works that are opposed to biblical principles. There are some good books that are written on parenting from a biblical perspective, but we don't look to those secular works that are opposed to what the Bible clearly from beginning to end teaches us about parenting. Whenever you look to history, several different areas in history. You will see that the breakdown in society usually stems from the breakdown of the family. And that always happens when the family, the structure of the family, The structure of wife to husband and children to parents moves away from these biblical principles that we're reading about here in Ephesians. This that we read about is how God ordained the family to operate and to exist. When we move away from that in sin and rebellion to God and to God's word, disaster is looming on the horizon. Always is. and it always comes crashing down unless there is revival, unless there is repentance. Well, children, obey your parents and the Lord for this is right. While dad was reading in 2 Timothy there, In 2 Timothy 3 verse 1, I want you to listen to two different passages here. It may take me a moment to find them because they're not in my notes. 2 Timothy 3 verse 1, but understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive." Listen to what he includes in this long list of terrible, terrible things. Disobedient to their parents. Now turn with me to Romans 1. We've read this from verse 18 on a couple different times over the last several months. Verse 28, Romans 128, And since they did not see fit to acknowledge God, God gave them up to a debased mind to do what ought not to be done. Now that should say enough right there. God in His wrath lifts His restraining hands from these that He talks about in verses 18 through 27. But since they did not see fit to acknowledge God, God gave them up to a debased mind to do what ought not to be done. They were filled with. Now here is a long list of grievous sins. And what are they? They were filled with all manner of unrighteousness, evil, covetous, malice. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, maliciousness. They are gossips, slanderers, haters of God, insolent, haughty, boastful, inventors of evil, disobedient to parents." Do you think obedience to your parents is important to God? twice over, in a list of evils, sin, heinous sins, we have listed disobedient to parents. Children, obey your parents, for this is right. Obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. We have the parallel passage to this in Colossians 3.20, which says, children, obey your parents in everything. For this pleases the Lord. And we have a great many other passages in Scripture which point to the same command. Proverbs 6.20 says, My son, keep your father's commandments, and forsake not your mother's teachings. Proverbs 23.22, Listen to the father who gave you life, your father who gave you life, and do not despise your mother when she is old. Honor your father and mother. Obey them. Listen to them. Proverbs 1.8, Hear, my son, your father's instructions, and forsake not your mother's teachings. Don't be disobedient to them. Obey your parents and the Lord. As to the Lord, for this pleases the Lord. Why should children obey their parents? Why should parents want their children to obey them? Because Paul says this is right. This is right. It's natural, Paul says, for children to obey their parents. Now, not natural according to the fallen nature of man, but natural in accordance to what God said and created the family structure to be. Eve was given to Adam as a helpmate, and then children were given to them to raise, to disciple, to instruct, to bring them up, to raise them up, to teach them. This is right. This is according to the nature, the created order of things by the plan and ordained will of God. But there's more. Paul adds to this something additional. Yes, obey your parents' children, for this is right. It is according to the natural order of God's creation, but also, then he adds in the very next verse, honor your father and mother. This is the first commandment with a promise. Paul quotes here from the Decalogue, from the Ten Commandments. He brings in the law. We read this in two places, both in Exodus and Deuteronomy. They read essentially the same with one minor difference. In Leviticus it says, as the Lord your God commanded you. But this reads in Exodus 20 verse 12, Honor your father and mother, that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you. Now this was part of those 10 commandments that were not all of the commandments that were given to Moses. There were a lot more. But these were the 10 foundational laws upon which everything else was built. I've remarked many times in the past about what a mystery it is that these are the 10 things that God would include in the Decalogue. The laws to be given by God and these are the 10. Man might put one or two of them on there, but the rest, only God. Now, I don't want to get off of our subject here this morning, but Paul points us back in verse 2 of our text to these tablets of stone, these stone tablets containing the Ten Commandments, one of which is the commandment for children to honor their father and mother. of all the things that God could have commanded in this list of ten, one of them written by God's own finger according to Exodus 31. One of these He gave to Moses, Exodus 31, 18 says, And he gave to Moses, when he had finished speaking with him on Mount Sinai, the two tablets of the testimony, tablets of stone, which were written with the finger of God. And one of them is regarding obedience and honoring your father and your mother. Listen elsewhere to what is recorded in Scripture for us regarding the importance of this command. In Deuteronomy 27, 16, we read, Cursed be anyone who dishonors his father or his mother, and all the people shall say, Amen. So be it. Let it be so. Exodus 21, 17, Whoever curses or dishonors, in another translation, his father or his mother, shall be put to death. You think this wasn't serious to God? Well, and this is the first commandment with a promise. There are many, many discussions on what this means. The first commandment with a promise. In reality, it's the only commandment in the Ten Commandments that has a promise attached to it. So I think it's doubtful that Paul is saying it meaning that this is the first of the ten that has a promise attached. I think the best possible explanation after reading this, going through it, looking at several different things is that it doesn't really mean first like we mean first when we talk about something being first. But instead this is to mean chief or of utmost importance. And isn't it true that children in obedience to their Christian parents seeking to raise their kids in accordance with God's Word would be the primary thing? How are your children going to learn everything else? Children learning in obedience to their parents how to be obedient to their heavenly Father and to do that which is His will. that which pleases Him. Is this not a primary thing, a thing of first importance? Out of this will flow everything else, everything else. And this promise that Paul speaks of back in our text in Ephesians 6, in verse 2, and then he repeats the promise in verse 3. This promise originally to the Jews, Paul now relates to all, Jew and Gentile. His congregation here in Ephesus was a mixture of Jews and Gentiles. Paul doesn't do away with the law in this respect. There are many today who say that there's no place for the law. that the law has no place in the Christian's life. We're free from the law. And praise God that we are free from the law in keeping it to gain our salvation. Praise God for that. It's revealed to us through the New Testament that the purpose of the, well, even in the Old Testament being pictured, but clearly in the New Testament that the purpose of the law was to drive us to our Savior, to the Messiah, to Jesus Christ. But it still has its purpose. And we are still shown by the law what God says is holy and what God says is right. We can't unhitch from the Old Testament as one popular minister would have us to do. And we can't just forget about these things. Paul brings it in here, doesn't he? This is still useful and good to show us what is righteous and holy in the eyes of God, and it drives us to Christ. How are we to do all these things? Wives, submit to your husbands, ask the Lord. Children, obey your parents in the Lord. Bond servants, obey your earthly masters with fear and trembling, with a sincere heart, as you would Christ. So Paul here in the New Testament addresses them with this and says that it's not only right by order of nature for children to be obedient to their parents, but it's the command of God. One of the ten most important and foundational laws. And now he says it's the first law, it's the primary law. The primary and it has a promise. Now this promise is in general terms. Right? It's not that some will not die young. And it's not that everyone who is obedient to their parents will live a long life, but in general principles, this is the case. Martin Lloyd-Jones points out that it is the principle, it is the general way that things work out, that children who are disobedient to their parents fall into all kinds of vices. Drugs, alcohol, sensuality, riotous living, think of the prodigal son. which has a tendency to shorten life. Does it not? All these things do. Living a sinful life puts you at odds with what we were created to be. All of these things born out of a disobedient life that tends to shorten one's life. There are always exceptions. I think of Robert Murray McShane. A man who, probably of more modern people, was probably the one seeking to be most obedient to God of anybody I've ever read about, lived to be a grand old age of 29. There are exceptions to this. But as a general principle, this is the way it is. We could go further, into further detail on this, but for time's sake, we'll have to move on. I'll point out and circle back to one thing before we move on to the parent's duty. We have been shown by Paul that children are to be obedient because nature dictates it and the law commands it. But look again at verse 1. Ephesians 6, 1. Children, obey your parents in the Lord. In the Lord. For this is right. Nature dictates it, the law commands this obedience, but grace enables it. Children, obey your parents in the Lord. Grace is given to those children that are obedient to their parents. This is the way in which true gospel obedience is accomplished. If there is no grace given from above, fallen nature will rebel against being obedient to parents. Doesn't this fit perfectly? with what Paul has been dealing with all throughout Ephesians. We are drawing to a close, to the close of this epistle, and he has never left the concept of grace. Never. Christ himself is even our example in this, isn't he? Look at Luke 2. 41 through 48. Luke 2, 41 through 48. This is while Jesus was a young child. Now His parents went to Jerusalem every year at the feast of the Passover, and when He was 12 years old, they went up according to custom. And when the feast was ended, as they were returning, the boy Jesus stayed behind in Jerusalem. His parents did not know it. But supposing Him to be in the group, they went on a day's journey. But then they began to search for Him among their relatives and acquaintances. And when they did not find Him, they returned to Jerusalem, searching for Him. After three days, they found Him in the temple, sitting among the teachers, listening to them and asking them questions. All who heard Him were amazed at His understanding and His answers. And when His parents saw Him, they were astonished. And His mother said to Him, Why have you treated us so? Behold, your father and I have been searching for you in great distress. And then what do we read? And he said to them, why were you looking for me? Did you not know that I must be in my father's house? And they did not understand the saying that he spoke to them. Now listen, and he went down with them and came to Nazareth and was submissive to them. and his mother treasured up all these things in her heart. The Lord of glory submitted himself to his earthly parents, to his mother and his stepfather, his adopted father, Joseph. He submitted himself to them that he might perfectly fulfill the law on our behalf. Now let's try and move quickly through the rest of this section. Ephesians 6-4, Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. This section has been translated as, Parents, do not provoke your children to anger. But I think there is a reason for us to think that the proper translation is, Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger. And I won't go into this for time's sake of why I think that's the case, but the primary responsibility to lead the family rests on the Father. And it is a weighty task, even more so when we are dealing with the remainders of indwelling sin, that old sin nature. I think all Christian fathers, at one time, or pretty much all the time, feel the inadequacy of what God has called us to do. We were hit pretty heavy in the exhortation by Paul to love our wives as Christ loved the church. And now we get hit again with this difficult portion of Scripture. The duty, the difficult duty of leading our children in a way that does not cause them to have anger, but to discipline them and instruct them in the Lord. So how are we going to do this great task? This task of not provoking our children to anger and bringing them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. A couple of things here as we look at this. I am extremely grateful for the grace of God in both enabling a father and in forgiving a father. We have, according to Hebrews, grace in our time of need. We, as fathers, are in great need of grace to accomplish this task. and for forgiveness. Didn't He already tell us in Ephesians 1 verse 7, in Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses? That He forgives us when we fail? And how does He forgive us? In Christ. It's always in Christ. But this is a duty given to us as fathers. It's not outsourced. We don't send our kids to some school to be disciplined. to be instructed in these matters. It's not on them to do it, it's on us to do it. This is not even the responsibility of the church. The responsibility for this lies on fathers and on mothers, but primarily on fathers as they are the leaders of the home. Someone once said that if we're too busy to do this, we're just too busy. That hurts, because we're often too busy. As Christians, we don't have a choice in this, as difficult as the task may be. It is something that is given to us as a command. This is not, it would be better if you would do this. It's do this. Fathers, we're told, do not provoke your children to anger or to wrath. This is in regards to rearing children, raising them up, instructing them, disciplining them, leading them. This is a difficult task, we've said, an impossible task, if not led by the Spirit. Is it any wonder, we'll go back again, is it any wonder in verse 18, that we are told in chapter 5, verse 18, and be not filled, do not get drunk with wine, be not filled with wine, which is excess or for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit. These things that Paul is telling us to do in these relationships that we have, wives to husbands, husbands to wives, children to parents, parents to children, masters to servants, servants to masters, none of that can be done according to the way that it pleases the Lord if we are not filled with the Spirit of God. Impossible. If there's any hope of it being according to what God has purposed or ordained, it must be in the Spirit. Well, how is it that we might be provoking our children to anger? I have to think about this a lot, because I fail at it a lot. We may be provoking our children to anger by being overprotective. That's a difficult one for even Christian fathers because we want to protect our children. But we may be too overprotected. This is a struggle for sure. When we see the world around us and the evil that is in the world, we long for the safety and security of our children. And that is not wrong. We have a burden for their salvation. That is altogether right. But we often become too overprotective. And we don't even want our children to grow. Because in the flesh, we want our children to need us. This often leads to one of the other areas, which is not encouraging their growth, or the lack of noticing their growth and maturity. We want them. We as parents want our children to need us. But what we should want more than that is for them to need Christ. To look to Christ first and foremost. What about favoritism? Favoritism may be an issue. It presented itself in the Bible. Maybe even favoring one child over the other because of similarities. Did we not see this with Jacob and Esau? Did we see this? Genesis 25-28 says, Isaac loved Esau because he ate of his game, but Rebekah loved Jacob. Jacob was more like Rebekah. Esau more like Isaac. What about neglect? Neglecting our children because of other duties or desires. Remember what I said? I wish I remembered who said it. If you're too busy, that we're often too busy to do these things. What about neglect? Neglect may be an issue, even if the reason for neglecting is honorable. Me being gone all the time to make money for my family may end up showing up as neglect of my family. Me sitting in an office reading all the time, which is not a bad thing. Wanting to learn may be a source of neglect because I'm not spending the time that is needed with my family. We have an example of this in 1 Samuel. in 1 Samuel, Eli. 1 Samuel 2.12 said, Now the sons of Eli were worthless men. Worthless. They did not know the Lord. And in 1 Samuel 2, 22 through 25, now Eli was very old and he kept hearing all that his sons were doing to all Israel and how they lay with the women who were serving at the entrance of the tent of meeting. And he said to them, why do you do such things? For I hear of your evil dealings from all these people. No, my sons, it is no good report that I hear the people of the Lord spreading abroad. If someone sins against a man, God will mediate for him. But if someone sins against the Lord, who can intercede for him?" But they would not listen to the voice of their father, for it was the will of the Lord to put them to death. And the Lord declared that He would reject Eli's house, and we learn why. that came about in 1 Samuel 3 verse 13. And I declare to him that I am about to punish his house forever for the iniquity that he knew because his sons were blaspheming God and he did not restrain them. Eli neglected his sons, Hophni and Phinehas. Maybe another cause of this provoking to wrath is her own bitterness and discontent. There's often, I've found in my own life, that what I say or what I am seeking to teach my children, even though it may be right, what I am seeking to teach them, but the manner in which I say it or the state of my heart when I say it is bitter or cruel due to discontent in my own life. This may be one of the most prevalent ways in which we might lead our children to anger and provoke them to anger. What about inconsistency? We can tell our children that the word of God is vital. that the worship of God is important, that the assembling of ourselves together is needed, and then show them something totally different by the way that we live. Kids pick up on this, and they view it as hypocrisy. And they view it as hypocrisy long before they know anything about the struggle between the flesh and the spirit. Long before they know anything about the struggle against the remainders of indwelling sin. We portray these things to our kids in our actions versus what we say and they view it as being hypocritical. We don't ever want to be the type of parent that says, do what I say, not what I do. Kids will pick up on that immediately. Well, this is an important command given to us as fathers, and this is first given to us as a negative. Don't do this. Don't provoke your children to anger. But Paul doesn't stop there. Paul goes on from the negative command to the positive. Don't do this. Do not do this. Do not provoke your children to wrath, but do this. But bring them up in the discipline and the instruction of the Lord. First, we must see that the instruction and the discipline must be of the Lord. This is the chief concern and duty of a parent. in particular of the Father, that they raise their children, disciplining them, instructing them, not in the wisdom of the world, not in the latest fad, but in those things that are of the Lord, according to His Word, of those things which have eternal value, lasting importance, and in particular, those things which would make them wise unto salvation. Isn't that what Paul was pointing to in 2 Timothy 3.15? And how from childhood you have been acquainted with the sacred writings, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus? In reality, what's more important than this? Is there anything more important than the fact that your child would be redeemed, conquered by the grace of Jesus Christ, and secure for all eternity. This is why I'm somewhat at odds with our brothers and sisters on the more Presbyterian side of things. They raise their children as Christians. I'm seeking to raise my children as lost and dying souls in a Christian family, pointing them to Jesus Christ. They have a need of salvation. They are not already Christians. Child is not a Christian. Your child is not a Christian until your child has been conquered by Jesus Christ, until they've been made a new creature, a new creation. When old things have passed away, even that, think about what that says. Old things have passed away, does that not necessitate that something was there before? If there's something new come, something has passed away. Had to be something remade. The first birth didn't cut it. It wasn't good enough. Christ told Nicodemus, you must be born again. All your first birth did was put you in condemnation. The second birth, the new creation, that's where it's at. You must experience this. This is what we should be disciplining and instructing our children in. I want my children to be successful. I want them to be happy, and I am happy when God blesses them. But these things in the world are absolutely and utterly meaningless. Completely meaningless. They have no eternal weight. Do you see what God has set before us? He has lent us our children for the purpose of this. This is what Paul declares to us is the purpose of us as parents. As Christian parents, by inspiration of the Holy Spirit, bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. Are you more worried about them getting married than you are marrying A spouse who can be what he declares that they should be in that last part of Ephesians 5? A wife that can be submissive as to the Lord? Or your daughter marrying a husband who can love them as Christ loved the church? Are you more worried about them getting a job than serving the God that they must one day stand in front of and give an account? Are we more worried about their bank account than the poverty of their own souls? God help us to do that which God has called us to do as parents. If we haven't been doing it, that God in His grace would forgive us and put us on the right way. Whatever is getting in the way of that. If you work too much, stop working so much. Don't neglect your children. Don't be like Eli. Yes, provide for your family. Provide for their lives and their food and the covering over their head and the clothes that they wear as God enables you to provide. But don't neglect this. Instruct your children. Deuteronomy 6, 6-9, And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house. And when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise, when is it not that we're to teach them these things? Every moment our lives should be about teaching them the things of the Lord. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates. The things of the Lord should be presented constantly to your children. Psalm 78, one through eight. Give ear, O my people, to my teaching. Incline your ears to the words of my mouth. I will open my mouth in a parable. I will utter dark sayings from of old things that you have heard and known that our fathers have told us. We will not hide them from our children. but tell to the coming generations the glorious deeds of the Lord and His might and the wonders that He has done. He established a testimony in Jacob and appointed a law in Israel, which He commanded our fathers to teach to their children, that the next generation might know them. that children yet are born, and arise and tell them to their children, so that they should set their hope in God, and not forget the works of God, but keep His commandments, and that they should not be like their fathers, a stubborn and rebellious generation. A generation whose heart was not steadfast, whose spirit was not faithful to God. Children, honor your father and mother. Obey them in the instruction and in the discipline that they give to you. Don't regard these things lightly. Don't grow weary of them when reproved. A Christian parent seeking to do that which God has called them to do may fall flat on their face a hundred times. But by God's grace and seeking to be what God would have them to be, they long for your eternal well-being. In Hebrews 12, the writer is talking about the discipline of God to His children and making application to that of an earthly father. He says, and you have forgotten the exhortation that addresses you as sons. My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord, nor be weary when reproved by him, for the Lord disciplines the one he loves and chastises every son whom he receives. It is for discipline that you have to endure. God is treating you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline? If you are left without discipline, in which all have participated, then you are illegitimate children and not sons. Besides this, we have had earthly fathers who disciplined us, and we respected them. Shall we not much more be subject to the Father of spirits and live? for they disciplined us for a short time as it seemed best to them, but He disciplines us for our good, that we may share His holiness. For the moment, all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it. Therefore, the writer says, lift up your drooping hands and strengthen your weak hearts and make straight paths for your feet so that what is lame may not be put out of joint but rather be healed. We as parents should seek to discipline and instruct our children as the Father, God the Father, has disciplined us and instructed us. because we love them as He loved us. May God grant the children to obey and not be angered, and may God grant us as parents, as fathers, to bring up our children in the discipline and the instruction of the Lord. Let's pray. Lord, we thank You for Your Word. Lord, some things are hard to understand, exhortations that are difficult to bear. Lord, forgive us for failing in these regards. Lord, give us grace and strengthen us to do that which you command us to do. Lord, to teach our children, to keep on teaching our children, that they may teach theirs. that they may understand what it is to love their child and to be disciplined and to instruct them based on what You've enabled us to do in their lives as a picture of what the Heavenly Father has done for us. Lord, be with us throughout this week. Lord, draw us closer to You and closer to one another. Lord, and may we meditate upon Your Word throughout this week until we meet again. It's in the name of Christ we pray, amen.