OK, funny stuff. Guys, do we have the slides? Can we pull that up? So very, very funny stuff. I think that that would be appropriate for our couples class to relax and kick back and laugh at ourselves and learn quite a few things on the way. And it's interesting. Brother Mitch's talk about being self introspective as before the Lord. And so this morning I want to talk about, uh, managing our expectations in marriage. Um, and, and the funny stuff that he was talking about was, um, you know, marriage takes work, uh, and we have to accept the good with the bad. And then also love is a choice. Uh, so, um, You know, it's not long after we're married that we realize that our spouse isn't perfect. And I remember a Facebook post where a young man was celebrating his fifth wedding anniversary, and he wanted to heap praise upon his wife, and he was listing all these wonderful accolades and admirable qualities about his wife after being married for five years. And then he ended his post with saying, you know, if she just didn't love cats, she would be the total package. And so, you know, a little bit of a novice there. But I think that leads us to sometimes think, you know, if there was an aspect about our spouse, you know, they would just be perfect. But as those that have been married for a while, we realize amateurs, you can't change your spouse. But have you ever been coerced yourself in trying to do something or change something about yourself? You didn't like that, right? It didn't go very well. So why do we think that that would work with our spouse? Isn't it interesting, you know, that God brings opposites, opposites attract, and then the saying goes that after a few years, then opposites attack. You know, it's funny how God brings an optimist with a pessimist, an organized with a disorganized, a timely with a tardy, and an extrovert with an introvert. So as God meshes us together, we all have to manage our expectations. But isn't it true, you know, regardless of how long we've been married, sometimes we drift into that thinking like that young brother on Facebook. You know, if there was just that one aspect that we could change, well, they would just be perfect. Well, we're often guilty then of establishing ourselves as the golden standard. Proverbs 18.12 states, before destruction, the heart of man is haughty and before honor is humility. As Pastor Mark referenced, it takes work to maintain a good marriage. And so I'd like to take this verse and unpackage that for a little bit this morning. And I'd like to focus on the three H's of a successful marriage. One is to avoid, and two are to embrace. And the three H's are haughty, honor, and humility. The first word is haughtiness. Now, this is an old-fashioned term, and we don't use that much in our vocabulary very much. I certainly don't hear it with my grandchildren, and so I think it warrants especially for the younger generation, a definition. So Miriam Webster's definition says that haughty or haughtiness is blatantly and disdainfully proud, having or showing an attitude of superiority and contempt for people or things perceived to be inferior than ourselves. Synonym words are words such as proud, arrogant, and conceited. Ooh, those are ugly words. We don't like to think of ourselves as proud or arrogant or haughty, but it's amazing how Satan will subtly slip those thoughts into our thinking with our spouse and our perception of our spouse and even others, our Christian brothers and sisters. You know, when we set ourselves as the golden standard, whether in marriage or any relationship, you know, Scripture really says we're being haughty. And let's be reminded of a couple of other verses that warn us against haughtiness. Proverbs 16, 18 says, pride goeth before destruction and a haughty spirit before a fall. 2 Samuel 22, 28 says, and the afflicted people thou wilt save, but thine eyes are upon the haughty that thou mayest bring them down. So let us be reminded of this warning against pride and haughtiness, especially as it relates to marriage and the trap of measuring others. So that brings us to the second H, the word of humility. That word we want to embrace. Reviewing our verse again, before destruction, the heart of man is haughty, and before honor is humility. So let's unpackage humility for a minute. So what's the opposite of being haughty? Well, this verse tells us humility. Excuse me. Yes, before we can really receive honor, we need to begin with humility. And before we can have an honorable relationship with someone, it really begins with humility. It's really all about managing our expectations with each other. So let's talk about expectations for a minute. Is it wrong to have expectations in a marriage? Well, not necessarily so. I mean, there are realistic expectations and then there are unrealistic expectations. Realistic expectations, for example, are to love and to be faithful with each other. To be truthful with one another, a marriage that cannot thrive when it is in doubt and mistrust, to be committed to one another. Commitment says no matter what the difficulty may come our way, I am with you and I am for you. and you can count on me. And to be God-centered. When God is at the center of marriage, it means that both the husband and the wife make their relationship with God their first priority. And this priority enriches and deepens the relationship with your spouse. Before we talk about unrealistic expectations, I was thinking about this, and I think there are intermediate, just practical, everyday living, rubbing shoulder to shoulder expectations that are unique to each couple. And each couple really has to work those kind of things out. For example, there are expectations that we have with our spouse. A husband might learn after years of marriage not to to soak dirty golf balls in the wife's nice serving bowl, just because it's big, you know? And a wife might learn that when she uses her husband's tools to hang a picture or put something, that she puts the tools back in the toolbox. But, you know, those are just kind of everyday living kind of things that we have to work out. And so now moving on to unrealistic expectations, This is where we tend to get into trouble, isn't it? This is generally when we expect our spouse to think or behave in a particular manner like us. I mean, after all, we're the golden standard, right? Or we place certain personality trait and expect them to live up to that or fulfill that particular expectation. You know, James Dobson once said that that in reference that a wife will marry the strong and silent type and then when they're married she'll get frustrated because he doesn't want to talk. And you know Mark Gunger says in his little series that we'll show in couples class that if you ask a typical wife to explain the perfect husband she really describes another man and I think if you ask a man, what his perfect companion is, he'd probably describe a golden retriever. So the thing, the point is, is that we all live with unmet expectations, right? And when we live with these unmet expectations, it's just a reminder from the Lord that we can't receive total fulfillment from each other, that we have to seek the Lord. In John 16, 33, he says that these things I've spoken to you that in me you might have peace, but in the world you shall have tribulation. I think Mark, Pastor Mark covered that pretty well. But be of good cheer, I have overcome the world. It's easy to get caught up in the daily grind and looking around us and forget to look up, right? So this brings us to the third H, and the word is honor, also another word to embrace. And let's review our key verse again. Before destruction, the heart of man is haughty, and before honor is humility. So the word honor in this verse means splendor, glory, dignity. So what that verse is saying is that before you can receive splendor, glory, and dignity for yourself from others, that you first need to start with humility. People don't respond to haughtiness, pride, or self-righteousness. If we truly want to be honored, we must first be humble and put to death our pride and show grace to one another. Proverbs 17, 9 says, he that covereth a transgression seeketh love, but he that repeateth a matter separateth very friends. May we all be reminded of the forgiveness and grace that Christ gives us each and every day. Right. And also in Philippians. Two, three, and four, it says, let nothing be done through strife or vainglory, but in lowliness of mind, let each esteem other better than themselves. So we are not the golden standard. Look not every man on his own things, but also on the things of others. You know, when we esteem each other better than ourselves, we really do put to death pride and haughtiness and we quit trying to make our spouse to be like us, to think like us, to do things like us. It really frees us up to appreciate our spouse for the unique person that they are and how we really do compliment each other You know, when I send out a text or something, I always have my wife proofread that because she compliments that and makes sure she's way more personable and a people person than I am. And so she adds just that right tone and that flair. And oftentimes she'll go, yeah, I don't know that I would say it that way. And I'd say, OK, sweetheart, straighten me out here. So we complement each other with our differences. And getting back to marital expectations, I'd like to draw the devotional to close by referencing two primary expectations that we seem to deal with in marriage. You know, the first, back to what I was talking about, is the daily routine of adapting to one another and adjusting to just the minor irritations of living. And I often remember reading in a devotional one time about an author who said that And throughout his house, his wife would always leave drawers open. And it just frustrated him because he would round the corner and crack his shin on an open drawer. And it would just frustrate him. And that frustration grew and grew. And they would have many an argument. And her reasoning was, well, I opened that drawer But I was going to come back and put that back, and you just rounded the corner just at the wrong time. But you know what? That little thing, that frustration continued to build and to grow, and that frustration got to the point where he not resented the act, but he began to resent even her. So as a Christian man, he was driving home and thinking and praying about that one time and the Lord just kind of, he just felt kind of the Lord press on him and put his arm around him and said, If that's the worst problem you have with your wife, I think you have it pretty good. And he said, you know, Lord, I think you're right. So when he got home, he told his wife, he said, you know what? I was having a conversation with the Lord about our drawers problem. And the Lord told me, if you open drawers, I can close them. So he told his wife, he said, I don't want you to worry. I'm not going to fuss anymore. You can open as many drawers as you want, and I'm just going to close them. And so the author did honor that commitment. And it was freeing in their relationship not to be holding his wife hostage over an expectation that she couldn't seem to fulfill. You know, my wife is shorter than I am, and so there are things that she can't reach. And so it would be impossible for me to expect her to be able to reach the things that I do. So we complement each other. And so instead, it's freeing and life-changing to let go of these expectations. And the interesting thing is he was praying to the Lord about this. The Lord didn't, in this particular case, change her, but he changed what he could change, and that was himself. The second may be a very real and painful legitimate aspect of your marriage that you wish you could change or at least hope that your spouse and which would grow in a particular area. A wife might think to herself, I wish my husband would put more emphasis on bringing our family to church, or I wish my husband would lead our family in devotions, or I wish my husband weren't so controlling with our finances. On the other hand, a husband might think to himself, well, I wish my wife were more supportive of me, or I wish she would openly, when I openly share my dreams, she wouldn't be critical or put those down, or I wish she was more responsible in our finances. Well, all of these might be good and seemingly reasonable hopes and aspirations, but the fact of the matter is, We can't change our spouse. So what do we do? Well, we take those things to the Lord in prayer and see how the Lord works. And the Lord does work. I know that there are things in our marriage and growth that each of us have grown and matured as we prayed for each other. And as things have adapted and talking to my wife, she would say, yeah, I've been praying for you about that. Well, okay, well, that worked, you know? So prayer definitely does work, but also the key is to be faithful with honor in season and out of season. In closing, I'd like to draw off and take a cue from the wisdom of 1 Peter 3. Verses 1 and 2 and 7 through 9, it says, Likewise, you wives, be in subjection to your own husbands, that if any obey not the word, they also may be without the word and be won by the conversation of the wives. While they behold your chaste conversation, couple with fear. Dropping down to verse 7, likewise ye husbands, dwell with them in according to the knowledge, giving honor unto the wife as unto the weaker vessel, and being heirs together of grace of life, that your prayers be not hindered. Finally, be ye of one mind, having compassion one of another. Love us, brethren, and be pitiful and be courteous, not rendering evil for evil or railing for railing, but contrarize blessing, knowing that ye thereunto are called, that ye should inherit a blessing. And so in closing, You know, we may have expectations for each other, but God's expectation, and we certainly have needs of fulfillment, but you know, God's answer to that and his expectation is as we meet each other's needs, our own needs are met. And I know this is just really a reminder to us, but I do pray that it's been a blessing. And so, Brother Pat, would you close us out?