Take your Bibles and turn with me to 1 Thessalonians chapter 4. 1 Thessalonians chapter 4, we'll read verses 9 through 12. But concerning brotherly love, you have no need that I should write to you, for you yourselves are taught by God to love one another. And indeed you do so toward all the brethren who are in all Macedonia. But we urge you, brethren, that you increase more and more, that you also aspire to lead a quiet life, to mind your own business, and to work with your own hands as we commanded you, that you may walk properly toward those who are outside, and that you may lack nothing. Let's pray once more before the ministry of the word. Father, we come to this section in the book, a great commandment, an exhortation from You that we're to love one another. It was You who gave a new commandment as You were ready to part this earth, that we were to love one another. Of all the things You could have said, of all the commandments you could have given, of all the things you could have reminded the disciples of, it was love that was upon your lips. And so I pray that we might have some sense of the seriousness and importance of this exhortation this morning. And that you might teach us, as you taught the Thessalonians, that we might love in deed and in truth. that we might so reflect your character in this place. In Christ's name, amen. Well, as we come, it's been a while since we've been together in First Thessalonians, but we've come to chapters four and five, and these various exhortations, and maybe at first glance, it appears that these exhortations are sort of a wrapping up of the book, and he's checking off a list of things that he wants to cover, and that maybe they are, disconnected in some way, but these are not disconnected exhortations. They're not disconnected commands that come to us in chapter four and five, but they're actually quite connected to everything else that comes in the letter, particularly to his great concern that the Thessalonians are continuing with faith and in the faith, that faith is present in their midst. Paul's great concern and so great a concern that he's willing to be left alone and send Timothy back to check on their faith. His great concern is that they have faith. He says as much in chapter 3 verse 5 when he says, For this reason, when I could no longer endure it, I sent to know your faith. Why was this so important to Paul? Why must he know of their faith? Because without faith, everything else is useless. Without faith, all of these remaining exhortations are pointless. Paul is not at all interested that they have virtue for virtue's sake, but that everything they do flows out of and springs forth from an active and lively faith. Without this faith, Paul would say, our labor might be in vain. Whatever else you may be, however obedient to our commands you may be, however outwardly righteous you may be, without faith, all that we've done for you and all that we suffered on your behalf in Thessalonica is fruitless and empty. And so these various exhortations of which love, brotherly love is one, are not are all connected to this overarching concern of Paul about faith. Really, that is to say, we cannot be sexually pure in the way that Paul is exhorting us to be in verses one through eight, except we have faith. We cannot love as Paul exhorts us to love, except we have faith. So then these commands are all connected in that way. but they're also related to one another in this way. You see it in chapter four, verse one. Finally then, brethren, we urge and exhort you in the Lord Jesus that you should abound more and more just as you receive from us how you ought to walk and to please the Lord. They're related to each other in that every one of them tell us how we might please God. Would you like to please God? Be sexually pure, as he talks about in verses one through eight. If you would like to please God, love the brothers in the way that he exhorts us to in nine through 12. Again, our ultimate goal is not purity for purity's sake or love for love's sake, but for God's sake. Because we long to be pleasing to God. We don't keep these commands and exhortations as ends in and of themselves. but out of love to God and with a sincere, heartfelt, deep-seated desire to please God in all that we do. They're not disconnected. These are the ways that we can do what we most want to do, which is to please Almighty God, our Father. I can't emphasize this point enough. Many a Victorian was pure for purity's sake because that's what was done in that culture. And yet it was done without faith and it was done without a desire in many to please God. Many a liberal today performs charitable deeds because they believe it to be the greatest virtue. And they love because love is the end. And they do it without any consideration of pleasing God. Many a Mormon and Jehovah's Witness walk in uprightness and concern for their neighbors completely devoid of any living and active faith. So when Paul says to us, I want you to walk in a way to please God, and I want you to love one another, he's calling us to something far greater than the virtue of love. He's calling us to live a life with God at the center, a life in which we strive in every way to please Him, He's calling us to something far greater and far higher, to a life of act of faith where virtue is not an end in and of itself. The end goal of the Christian is God. And that's the end goal of all these exhortations. That God would be glorified. And that God would be pleased. So when Paul says to us in verse 9, but concerning brotherly love, what he's really saying is, concerning how you might please your Father. Let me talk to you for a little bit about how you might please your Father. Here then, by practicing brotherly love, you and I may walk in such a way as to bring pleasure to our Father, that He might smile upon us, that He might delight in this act of grace amongst us, loving one another. So concerning brotherly love, I want to ask and answer really just one question this morning. What is it? What is this brotherly love? What is it that Paul is speaking about in our text? And in the first place, it's a family love. It's a brotherly love. That's the word he uses in the text, phileo. It's a brotherly love. It's the love of a family. That's the language of the text. Notice that he speaks of brotherly love. Brotherly or brethren are used four times in these verses. And then another way that it's put is when he uses one another. He's making a distinction. Brothers, a family, one another. And then these are contrasted in verse 12 with those who are outside. And so what he's saying, first of all, is there's a family of God. And within this family of God, there ought to be love, one for another. He's making this distinction between the family and children of God and those who are outside. And he says, concerning brotherly love, I'm urging you. and exhorting you that there would be a warmth of affection within the family. And so this love is able to and does distinguish between the household of God and those who are outside the household of God. This is a distinction that God himself makes. We read it in 1 John chapter three. Behold what manner of love the Father has bestowed on us, that we should be called the children of God. There's family language. You've been brought in, if you are united to the Lord Jesus Christ, you are a child of God. You've been brought into the family of God. And then there's this distinction that comes in 1 John 3, 1. Therefore, the world, those outside, do not know us, because it did not know Him. God has made a difference between those who know Him and those who do not. God has made us His children. And here, the contrast is between the children of God and the children of the devil. The family of God and those who are outside. We see the same thing in 1 John 3.10. In this, the children of God and the children of the devil are manifest. The Bible itself makes this distinction between the household of faith and all who are outside that household. It marks out two families. And Paul is saying to us, within the family of God, there ought to be a special love. There ought to be a special attachment. There ought to be a warmth of affection that is not known in any other place. There's a union with Christ and a union with one another that ought to mark you out from all else around. There ought to be an affection one for another within this family. It's a love, we may not think of it often this way, but it's a love that has boundaries. God has made a distinction between the world and His children. It's a love that has boundaries. The Bible knows nothing of the universal brotherhood of man. and nothing of the universal fatherhood of God. The Bible certainly makes this distinction between the children of God and the children of the devil. Jesus himself makes this distinction and reveals the creation of this new family, speaks of it in family terms in Matthew chapter 12. Beginning in verse 46, he says this, while he yet talked to the people, behold, his mother and brother stood outside seeking to speak to him. Then one said to him, look, your mother and your brothers are standing outside seeking to speak to you. But he answered and said to the one who told him, who is my mother and who are my brothers? And he stretched out his hands toward his disciples and said, here are my mother and my brothers. For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother. The Lord Jesus Christ himself has instituted a new family. And this family, in some ways, takes priority over even our natural family and our natural ties. Now, this new family in no way dissolves our natural ties and the bond of affection that ought to be between natural siblings and family. It doesn't dissolve those bonds. But nevertheless, it does take priority over the natural family. These are my brothers and sisters, the Lord Jesus Christ says. This new family is eternal. It transcends this age. It transcends this lifetime. It's a family that continues for all of eternity. It's a family that's rooted in union to Jesus Christ. Luke 12, in Luke 12, Christ says this, Do you suppose I came to give peace on earth? I tell you, not at all, but rather division. For from now on, five in one household will be divided. Three against two, and two against three. Father will be divided against son, and son against father, and mother against daughter, and daughter against mother. Mother-in-law against daughter-in-law, and daughter-in-law against mother-in-law. Our new family. the family of God, must take priority over even our earthly ties. That is to say, we must never forsake the truth. We must never forsake the true God, even for our natural families. We must never side with unconverted, natural family over and against the truth of the Almighty God. We're bound together by stronger ties and more lasting ties than even our DNA. Listen, I love my wife. And I long to worship God with her, alongside of her, in heaven, free from sin. But she won't always be my wife. Because in heaven, they're neither married nor given in marriage. I have a family that takes priority even over my earthly family. A bond that will never break for all of eternity. Not because she's my wife, but because she's my sister in Christ. Because together we're united to the Lord Jesus Christ. And so as families, as earthly families, We ought to be centered around the family of God. The family of God ought not to be an appendix to our family. It ought not to be an appendix to our life, but it ought to be the central part of our life. This is the church of God. This is the family of God. This is what He came to create. Behold what manner of love God has declared unto us, that we are the children of God. You're my brothers and sisters. Before we move to our next point, let me give you two implications of this new family that God has created, and implications of this brotherly love that Paul is exhorting us to. First is, you ought to be closely involved with the family of God. This is what He came to do. This is a part of His mission. This is central to what the Lord Jesus Christ is doing in the world today. It's why we do missions that the family might grow. Everything is geared towards the building up of the family and household of God. You ought to be closely involved with the family of God. Involved in the life of the church. You cannot be said to be really practicing brotherly love when you do not actually belong to the household of God. when you don't belong to the church. When you live as an outsider and you only come and fellowship at times as an appendix when it's convenient, you ought to be involved and a member of the local church of Jesus Christ. You ought to belong to a particular church and be a part of the life of that particular church, intimately connected to it. You see, church membership is one of the ways in which God shows to the world this distinction between His children and the children of the devil. He marks us out in that way. Let me give you an analogy. As a family, the Hester family, There are a number of people who interact with us and bump into us and sit at our table and fellowship with us and they come and they borrow tools and they seek counsel and advice. They're friends. And they participate in and enjoy some aspects of the family, of our family. And yet they are not a part of the Hester family. Some people treat the church that way. Some people come and they interact They bump around and they fellowship with us and praise God for that. But in order to keep this exhortation, you must be a part of the family of God. You must become a member of the family of God. You must interact with the family of God on a deeper level. So I ask you this morning, what keeps you outside the membership of the local church? What keeps you from being an actual part of the family? What do you prioritize over the household and family of God? You remember in Acts 4, as the disciples were in trouble for preaching the gospel, and they were put away into prison, and when they were released, the text says something that maybe at first glance seems insignificant. They went unto their own. They ran to the church. They didn't go to daddy's house. They didn't go to grandma's house. They didn't go to even earthly families. They went to their own. They went to the church. But I love the way it's personalized. It didn't say they ran to the church. They went to their own. There was some ownership. These are my people. This is where I belong. And in times of trials and difficulties, it's here that I'll go. Not to the church as some nebulous idea, but to my own company, my own friends, my own family. Make the church your family. Come in to the church. Secondly, for those of you who are a part of the church, you must begin to think differently about the people who make up the church. This is important. You must, listen, you must like them. They must not be continual strangers to you. They must not be people, we cannot be people who only worship at the same place at the same time. That's not a family. That's not what the church is. They must be to you like family, and you must like them. You must have deep-seated affections for them. Is brotherly love? Yes. But let's not forget that second part. It's brotherly love. It's not toleration. It's love. It's affection. I mean, we must do far more than tolerate one another. Yes, we're to bear with one another's weaknesses, but we're to bear with one another's weaknesses with deep affection for one another, not merely as an irritation that we put up with, but as people we love deeply. That's what He's calling us to. He's not calling us to tolerate one another. He's calling us as the family of God to love one another, to like one another, to be connected to one another. We're to love all men, that's true. We're to love even our enemies, that's true. We're to love those that are outside, that's true. We're to have an agape love, a self-sacrificing love that seeks nothing in return, even for the enemies of Christ, that is true. But sometimes because we think that way, we think of people in the church that way. Well, with opportunity comes, I'm willing to sacrifice them for them. I'm willing to do things for them. I'm willing to sacrifice time and money for them. But in our minds, we don't make that distinction between the way we do that for those that are outside and the way we do for those that are inside. We're to practice agape love within the family of God. but with a warmth of affection for brothers and sisters that is deep-seated and sincere, that connects us to them in a way that we're not connected to those outside. That's what Paul is calling us to, that we love one another within the family of God as the family of God because we have the same Savior. There's a sense in which agape love is the greatest of all loves. The Scriptures teach us that. And yet there's a sense in which phileo, brotherly love, is unique and special as well. It's not less than. It's different in some ways. Do you have that affection one for another? Are you living in the household of God in that way? And so there are boundaries to this brotherly love to be expressed within the family. And I want to make an appeal here that maybe at first glance doesn't seem to fit the text, but I want to make an appeal in my appeal to you for brotherly love to Sunday evening worship. What does that have to do with brotherly love? We'll meet, we'll fellowship this morning, but there's meals to be had, we'll rush off. I find it in my experience that Sunday evening is one of those times where we as a family can relax. There's not the crush to get somewhere after evening service in which so much of brotherly love takes place. And I want to appeal to you to put into practice brotherly love and come in the evening to experience that time that is maybe in some ways unique that allows us this expression for brotherly love. Our second point then is this love is an expansive love. This is a love that is to extend to all the family of God. Now I've just said that it has boundaries. That it's a family love. There's boundaries to it. And now I'm saying to you that though it has boundaries, it's yet expansive and spreading. It's not narrow and restricted. This love This family love, this love of the household of God is not to be confined only to the four walls of this particular church. Our family is much bigger than Redeemer Baptist Church. Our family is worldwide. It is a large family and there is opportunity for our love to expand and spread to all saints everywhere. This is an important point in our text. Notice how Paul commends them for the love that they have in the second part of verse nine. I have no need to write to you, he says, for you yourselves are taught of God to love one another. And indeed you do so, what does he say? To all the brothers in Thessalonica? No, but to all the brethren and all who are in Macedonia. Their love, restricted to the family of God, this phileo, restricted to the family of God, nevertheless was spreading out to all saints wherever they had opportunities. Wherever they encountered the saints of God, their love for them went out. While they were members of a particular church, their love was not limited to that particular church. While they were connected to a particular people, their love went out to all the saints of God. It was a spreading type of love. It went out to a whole region. We're going to send Jim to help a man, Chin Ho, on the other side of the globe. We don't see Him face to face. By God's providence, geographically, there's not the opportunities for us to fellowship with Him in the way that we might would like, and yet there's an opportunity for us to love. Here's a man of God, a saint, a member of the household of God. He's to be loved by us. There ought to be a warmth of affection for him. Even though it's an unseen person, there's still this bond of union and connection with him. We are to love all the saints of God. We're to be interested in their well-being. We're to have affections for them. Surely this includes prayers and correspondence. interest, seeking information. Tell us, tell us, how is Chin Ho doing? Tell us, how are the Jetsons doing? Tell us of the people that have come to know the Lord through your ministry. It surely includes financial and pastoral helps. And when providence and geography allow, there ought to be interaction between saints and between churches. It's a love with boundaries, but it's not narrow or restrictive, it's extensive. Now, it's not at all likely that all the New Testament churches were identical, either in personality or practice. Certainly the Corinthian church was not at all like the Galatian church. And I doubt highly if all the churches of Macedonia were of the exact same stamp and imprint as the Thessalonican church. Surely in the main things, they're in agreement. We understand that. But there would have been differences. And so the brotherly love that Paul is calling you to practice is not in any way to be limited. Remember, it's extensive and expanding. It's not at all to be limited to only Reformed Baptists. It's not at all to be limited only to those that are exactly like us, who have our same personality, to those who part their hair the same way we part our hair. Listen to what Matthew Henry says. They not only loved those of their own city and society, or such as were near to them, or just of their own sentiments, but their love was extensive. And a true Christian love is so to all the saints, though distant from them in place and differing from them in some opinions or practices of less importance." Do you love like that? Are you capable of loving Christians who differ with you even on important matters? Isn't that just what is taught to us in 1 John 5.1? Everyone who loves the Father loves whoever has been born of him. There's not other qualifiers to that. If they are children of God, we are to love them, even if they differ with us in important issues. Andrew Young makes the same observation. Sadly, he says, this spirit is not always, the spirit of brotherly love, is not always present among us today. Denominationalism, painful doctrinal differences, unresolved personal tensions, and the sheer individualism of our culture have created suspicion and aloofness where affection ought to reign. Are we capable of loving others even when there are serious differences among us? Don't misunderstand what I'm saying. I'm not saying that these issues are unimportant. I'm not calling here for a mere Christianity that makes no difference between secondary matters. These secondary matters are important matters. They're important matters which distinguish us from other churches. But while there are distinctions between us, there ought to be no separation of affections. There should be no separation of affections between us and any other true church of Jesus Christ. Our church, the churches in our association, Reformed churches in general are not the only churches working and striving to please God in the building up of the kingdom of God. Nor does God love us more for our correct theology. We ought to have a love for His people, that as much as possible by His grace matches His love and affection for them. Thirdly, what is this love that He calls us to? It is an evidence of God's grace in you. It is an evidence of God's grace in you. Wherever this love exists, wherever it is found, in whatever culture, In whatever measure, wherever this love is found, it is surely a mark of God's grace. Notice what he says to them in verse nine. For you yourselves are taught by God to love one another. Here then is the chief mark of saving grace in the heart of a person. Do you love the brethren? Is there a warmhearted affection for the people of God? Is this a defining characteristic of your life? This brotherly love within the family of God is not natural to the heart of man. It doesn't exist by your bin of personality. It is supernatural. It is a matter of God's work in your heart. If there is love for the brethren, God has taught it to you. If there's love for the family of God, God has put it into your heart. You didn't work it up, it's not your personality. We can't look at others and say, well, their personality, they're such a loving person, and I'm not a loving person. God taught it to them. He's the only one who could teach it to them. Remember the words that Jesus spoke to his disciples in John 13. A new commandment I give to you that you love one another as I have loved you that you also love one another. By this all will know that you are my disciples if you love one another. Here's the mark of grace. God has put it into their heart. You will know that you are mine and the world will know that you are mine when you love one another. Because where that love is, God has been at work. Consider 1 John 3, 14. We know that we have passed from death to life. How? Because we love the brethren. Here's the chief mark of grace. Brothers and sisters, if you have this love, take heart. God Himself has put it into your heart. Here's assurance for you. Whatever other graces may be, weak and struggling, however immature we may be in all these other graces, even how immature our love for one another may be, if it is there in any measure, God has put it there. And however hard it may be to see other graces, All the grace has come along with it. If love for the brethren are there, God has worked in your heart. I know that many people wrestle with assurance. Am I saved? When was I saved? Could I be saved and do these things? Is there love for the brethren in your heart? God has taught it to you. God is at work. Rejoice in that. Take heart in that. Be strengthened and encouraged in that. If you have this grace of love for the brethren, then you can be sure all the other graces will follow. God is at work and God finishes and completes His work. Here's the chief grace then. Do you have it? Praise God for it if you do. Be assured that you have indeed passed from death to life. Well, maybe I'm speaking of this brotherly love this morning and you seem a stranger to it. You don't have it. You're thinking, I'm not seeing anything of that. I do enjoy the fellowship, but I don't know that there's this warmth of affection. I don't know that I have viewed the church that way or love the church in that way. You may look at your life. There may be many charitable deeds. but lacking this warmth of affection. After all, remember Paul warns us, you may bestow all your goods to feed the poor and give your body to be burned, and yet you may be without love. Maybe there's some of you here today who are without this love. What then? How are you supposed to keep this exhortation? The exhortation comes to you nonetheless for brotherly love. How are you to keep it? The answer is, you must come to Jesus Christ. He alone has the ability and power to put this love into your heart. Remember what we said at the very start. These exhortations are not to be understood as separate from active faith. You cannot leave here today and determine to do more and give more and serve more and bless more because all of those things can be done and yet not have love. J.C. Ryle put it this way. The love that the Bible speaks of will never be found except in a heart prepared by the Holy Ghost. It is a tender plant, love is a tender plant, and it will never grow except in one's soil. You may as well expect grapes to grow on thorns or figs on thistles as to look for love when the heart is not right. The heart in which love grows is a heart changed, renewed, and transformed by the Holy Ghost, by union with Christ, and sonship to God. And one of the first features of this new nature is to love. If you don't have it, there's only one place to get it. If you have it and it's weak, and it's immature, And it fluctuates. There's only one place to come and be strengthened in it, to have it more constant, more sure, more maturing and growing. You must come to Jesus Christ. Here's the point I'm making. The exhortation in our text, when Paul says, I'm exhorting you to brotherly love, is something that only God can perform. He's not exhorting us to do it in our own strength. No amount of grit and determination can create it. God must do it. You must come to Him to be renewed and transformed. Listen, if you have any love in your heart at all, God has done it. Therefore, don't discount it. If you have none of this love in your heart, only God can do it. And it's only found in Him. But at any rate, make no mistake, the Bible is very clear. He who does not love his brother abides in death. The command that Paul gives us is a command of life. To refuse to love the brethren, to refuse to obey the commandment as Paul lays down in this text is to abide in eternal death. But preacher, I'm full of sin. I'm spotted by the world. I'm so full of hate. You don't know what these people have done to me. I am so burdened with hatred for other people. My family has wronged me. My workers and bosses have wronged me, and I am full of hatred. Well then, the Lord says, come unto me. Bring it all. Bring all of that. And in Him find peace and rest and love for the brethren. In Him find healing for all that hatred. He can do it and He does it. The command and exhortation to us this morning is for brotherly love, a family love. Let us all, each one of us, every one of you, Turn to Christ that He may fill our hearts full of this love for one another and let us practice it in this place and let it spread to all the saints in every place. Let's pray. Father, You have commanded us to do that which is not natural to us. It can't be done in our own strength. But we do see in this text the importance of it, and how it brings you pleasure. And so we come to you, and we plead with you, and we ask that you might create this love in us by your almighty power, that it would be real and genuine, and that it would be one of the chief marks of this church. We want to do all things well. We want to sing well. We want to preach well. We want to do all the things that make up a church. But if our singing is not good, if the preaching is feeble, if we are not to have nice things, whatever it may be, O God, give us this love, for here is the mark of Your people. Give us this great and chief mark of your grace. In Christ's name we pray, amen.