Have you ever wanted to see a photo of Jesus? See what he looked like when he walked the earth. I think that is a natural desire for many Christians, especially during a holiday time of year. You know, we wonder what did Jesus look like when he was in the manger? What did he look like when he was 5 years old, when he was 10 years old, when he was 15 years old, when he was 25 years old? In the Christmas program a few weeks ago, Jesus looked exactly like a baby doll. And I know because we took the baby doll home with us after the program. In the very conservative Bible-believing home in which I grew up, there was always hung in the living room on the wall the classic picture of Jesus painted by Warner Salman. How many of you know the picture I'm talking about? tones of brown. He looked like a hippie. As a child growing up, I knew exactly what Jesus looked like. I mean, the picture was right there on the wall. And then, you know, my pastor, that was in the 70s, my pastor started preaching that Jesus didn't have long hair, and then I knew that wasn't a picture. I figured out that no one really knew what Jesus looked like, not Warner Solomon, not anyone. Over the holidays, we hear a Christmas song written in 1951 by Willa Hudson and Alfred Burke that rings with this sentiment. Some children see him lily white, the baby Jesus born this night. Some children see him lily white with tresses soft and fair. Some children see him bronzed and brown, the Lord of heaven to earth come down. Some children see him bronzed and brown with dark and heavy hair. Some children see him almond-eyed, this Savior whom we kneel beside. Some children see him almond-eyed with skin of yellow yew. Some children see him dark as they, sweet Mary's son to whom we pray. Some children see him dark as they, and ah, they love him too. The children in each different place will see the baby Jesus face like theirs, but bright with heavenly grace and filled with holy light. Oh, lay aside each earthly thing, and with thy heart as offering, come worship now the infant King. It is love that's born tonight. Now as wonderful as that sentiment may sound when it's crooned by Andy Williams or Johnny Mathis, the truth is that we don't really know what Jesus looked like. But the final line of that song, as sentimental as it may be, actually contains a kernel of truth. That last line, "'Tis love that's born tonight." Here in 1 Corinthians 13, We don't have a photograph of Jesus, not even a portrait, but we do have a sketch of Jesus drawn in the lines of this poem. This poem that is all about agape love. Every line is a line in his face, as it were. The descriptions of agape love provide the best picture of Jesus that we have. So this morning we're going to take a look at this sketch. Love was indeed born the first Christmas day in the person of Jesus. And so as we look at agape love through the lens of 1 Corinthians 13 this morning, I trust that you will see Him. Let's read verses 4-7, 1 Corinthians 13, reading verses 4-7. Love suffers long and is kind. Love does not envy. Love does not parade itself, is not puffed up, does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil, does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth, bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. And some of you can hardly stand it that I'm not going to read the next verse. But we'll get to that in a week or two. We see Jesus, first of all, in the line at the end of verse 4. Love is not puffed up. Love is not puffed up. The translation in our New King James Version is very good. The word in the original language is phusiao. Phusiao. Will you say that with me? Phusiao. Sounds like you're blowing up a balloon, right? You see, uh-oh, and that's the idea. Bigger and bigger. We talk about somebody getting the big head, and that's the idea here in this word. We're puffed up when we have an inflated idea of our own importance, when we have what we today call a big ego. We all understand what Paul is talking about here. Now Paul specifically used this verb puffed up in two other places in this letter to describe the Corinthian Christians. So keep your finger here and turn back with me a couple of pages to chapter 4, 1 Corinthians chapter 4. 1 Corinthians 4, verses 6 and 7, now these things, brethren, I have figuratively transferred to myself and Apollos for your sakes, that you may learn in us not to think beyond what is written, that none of you may be puffed up on behalf of one against the other. For who makes you to differ from one another? And what do you have that you did not receive? Now, if you did receive it, why do you boast as if you had not received it? The Christians in the church at Corinth had many advantages. They had been taught by apostles of Jesus. These apostles had imparted to them many spiritual gifts, but rather than using those gifts in an appropriate way, they got big heads. And we need to understand that as American Christians, we stand in the very same place. We worship in church buildings. worth hundreds of thousands of dollars, millions of dollars. I went to see my barber this week and, you know, he always asks what's going on. I told him, you know, about our church. He had just had a pastor in the church in the chair. They said they had the same thing happen to them and they were going to max out a multi-million dollar insurance policy. We have wonderful church buildings. We have seminary-educated professors. We have multiple Bible versions. I mean, pick from dozens. And it makes us think that God's work on earth centers on what happens in this country, on American Christianity. And that is so not true. It is an indication of fusiao, of our big heads, rather than using what God has given us. We're very much like the Corinthian Christians. And then flip over a few pages to chapter 8, 1 Corinthians chapter 8 and verse 1. Now concerning things offered to idols, we know that all have knowledge. Knowledge puffs up, but love edifies. The believers in the Corinthian church had big heads because of the Bible knowledge they had, the knowledge that they had received from Paul and Peter and Apollos. So again, this kind of Christian egotism is not just something that's out there. It's not just something that happens in huge churches and evangelicalism. It's not something that just happens in Pentecostal and charismatic circles where people boast in the spiritual gifts they have. It can happen right here in a Bible church. It can become very easy for us to boast in the Bible knowledge we have. I go into this series I'm going to preach on Wednesday night with fear and trepidation because some people they just have so much ego when it comes to knowing what the Bible has to say about prophecy. It's easy for us as Christians to get puffed up. But let me tell you, Jesus wasn't puffed up. I want you to think that Jesus led the most influential movement in human history. But he didn't act that way. He was born a king. We just sang all kinds of Christmas carols about that fact. But he never acted that way. I mean, think about it. He never even really acted like God. You know, when you read through the Gospels, do you ever get the sense that Jesus is trying to keep the fact that He's God the Son a secret? I do. This is not someone who ever had a big head. This is someone who laid aside the glory of heaven to take the form of a slave, Paul says in Philippians 2. That's not a big head. That's not ego. That is who you and I are to be like. Paul's word picture of Jesus continues in verse 5 as we focus on the next part of this picture of agape love. Love does not behave rudely. Or let me give you the Gerard paraphrase, agape does not have bad manners. I like the way John MacArthur puts it, love is much more than being gracious and considerate, but it is never less. Many Christians have the wrong idea about manners and etiquette. They classify it in their minds as something that's only for the upper class, it's only for the hoity-toity, and that is the wrong idea. Years ago, I read a brief article by Emily Post on why manners are important, saying, please and thank you, holding doors, chewing with our mouths closed, dressing appropriately, shaking hands, sending RSVP, and this time of year in particular, sending thank you notes. It's a matter of consideration for others, she said. The opposite of good manners is thoughtlessness. It's refusing to think enough of the people around us to ensure that we don't make them uncomfortable by how we act. There's nothing spiritual about being coarse or rude. I think some Christians misunderstand this because they know that we're not supposed to care about what other people think of us. We're not supposed to be men-pleasers. They know at times that we need to speak for Christ or we need to speak for the truth in ways that will make other people uncomfortable. Paul, in fact, teaches that very principle right here in 1 Corinthians. But here's the point. If we give offense, it must be the offense of the cross. It must be because we are willing to take up the cause of Christ crucified. We ought never to offend because we're too ignorant or too inconsiderate to act in a polite and becoming way. I've heard it put like this. There's a difference between being a fool for Christ and being just a plain fool. By our actions we ought to adorn the gospel. It's one of the most beautiful phrases, I think, in the New Testament. People ought to be drawn to us so that they will be drawn to our Savior. And so if you don't know proper etiquette and manners, learn. I can still remember the day as a freshman at Bob Jones University when Bennet Jones taught our freshman orientation class. She brought in this giant fork and this giant spoon. They were about this big. And she proceeded to instruct us in table manners. Good manners are part of agape love. Part of being more concerned with others than with myself. Part of putting myself out for others. Our behavior ought to adorn the gospel, never turn people away from the gospel. And Paul specifically rebuked the Christians in the church at Corinth because they were being rude to one another in their public services. We learn this in 1 Corinthians 14, the next chapter. We haven't gotten there yet. But apparently they were talking over one another. One would be speaking in tongues and one would be giving a prophecy and another one would be singing a psalm. And Paul said in that chapter, the last thing that he said, his parting shot, let all things be done Decently and in order. And that word that's translated decently there in our versions is built on the very same root word as the word translated behave rudely in chapter 13. They're opposites. They're antonyms. The word there in 1 Corinthians 14 and verse 40 means to behave with propriety, with good taste, with courtesy. And so certainly our behavior as brothers and sisters in Christ here in the local church, we are to behave in such a way in our services, in our meals. Now, I can't point you to a verse that says that Jesus had good manners, but it's certainly obvious that Jesus cared more for others than he did for his own life. On the other hand, he certainly offended at times. He called the Pharisees a pit of vipers. I'm sure they thought he was rude. But when I think of Jesus at the wedding in Cana, when I think of Jesus in the home of Mary and Martha and Lazarus, I think of one who was considerate and gracious because he was agape love in the flesh. Verse 5 goes on to add a third line to this sketch of Jesus. 1 Corinthians 13, verse 5, love does not seek its own. Love does not seek its own. Now in my opinion, this injunction gets to the heart of the matter. If I was forced to pick just one of the ways that are listed here in 1 Corinthians 13 that is the exact opposite of agape love, it would be this one. Agape is about doing what is in the best interests of others. It is focused on the object of that love. When we are focused on self, then that is the opposite of agape. Now, this phrase that's translated, love does not seek its own, here in our New King James Version, can have several meanings. First of all, it can mean love does not insist on having its own way. You'll never hear love say, it's my way or the highway. Love does not put itself ahead of everyone else. That kind of selfishness was rampant in the church in Corinth. In fact, I think much of the dissension, much of the problem that was going on in the church of Corinth was caused by this kind of outright, unvarnished selfishness. It affected every area of that church's life, their exercise of their spiritual gifts, their practice of the Lord's Supper, their response to preaching, their willingness even to take each other to court. In the second place, this phrase can also mean love is not self-seeking or love is not self-serving. This second meaning focuses on motive. really gets to the heart of the matter. Doing what I do, even when I do it for other people, so that I am primarily the one who benefits. As fallen human beings with deceitful hearts, to act in this way is our natural tendency. We give to missions, yes, but we would not give in that way if we didn't get the maximum tax break. Or we serve in this way or that way in the church, but in our conversations we make sure that others know what we're doing so they'll think highly of us. This kind of self-serving can happen in a thousand little ways in our lives. The old theologians had a word that they used to describe agape love, god-like love. It was the word disinterested. It sounds strange, doesn't it, to talk about disinterested love. But the point of that was that true love, agape love, whatever it does, it does in a way that cannot profit me. Even if I do something that could profit me, I'm going to try to do it in a way that does not. It's not going to accrue to my interest. We are beings who so often have mixed motives. So we need to make certain that our love, our service for others, our ministry to others is truly disinterested. It's pure. And then Paul uses in the third place this same phrase in chapter 10 in a third way, and that is to describe those who can see a problem only from their own perspective. They're unwilling to see a problem or address a problem from any other viewpoint than their own. And again, agape is concerned for others. It wants what's best for others. And so it can see the problem from their perspective. On the shelf in my office there is a book entitled Fumbling the Future. And it's about the first billion dollar company. Anybody know what the first billion dollar company was? What? GM? Apple? Apple was the first trillion dollar company. Xerox. Xerox became the first billion-dollar company by figuring out how to do plain paper copy. They made a billion dollars, and with that billion dollars, they created the world-class research center. It was called PARC, Palo Alto Research Center. They hired geniuses from all over the world to come and serve in this place. One of the reasons why you didn't pick Xerox is because they invented all kinds of cool stuff that they never monetized. Do you know who invented the personal computer? Do you know who invented the mouse? You know who invented the GUI? Do you know what GUI stands for? G-U-I? The graphical user interface that you can, you know, navigate with a mouse? Do you know who invented the network? They had all of this stuff just to do work inside of PARC. And I read an article this week, I'm way off the subject, but I've got to tell you. I read an article this week that Apple, in their infancy, paid hundreds of thousands of dollars in stock, that if Xerox had kept it, would be worth $3.4 billion today, just so they could come in for three days into park and look around. And so you know how all of that stuff ended up being produced by Apple? Apple's the one that took it all and monetized it. Now, here's my point in telling you about Park. I want you to think about what it would have been like to work in this place that was populated by geniuses. Every one of them at the top of their field. I mean, when there was a disagreement, It was a big disagreement. And the man that ran PARC had a very unique way of approaching that. He would get the two parties or persons involved and they would be in front of everybody in the entire center. And they had to talk with each other until each person could explain the problem to the satisfaction of the other person. They could explain the problem and the proposed solution from the viewpoint of the person that they disagreed with. And very often, that brought agreement. Now, I use that same approach at times when I do counseling. But you know what? I can counter people. They can go through that exercise. They can say what the other person sees and their viewpoint and the solution, and yet they will never approach the problem from the viewpoint of another person. They only will ever see it through their own eyes. Is that you? That mean? It wasn't Jesus. Tell me, why did Jesus come? Why was he born on Christmas Day? He became human. So that he could feel what human beings feel. So he could see everything through our eyes. So that he could address our biggest problem. The same way. I love the verse in Hebrews that says that He can be touched with the feeling of our infirmity. I love the scenes in the Gospels where it says that He was troubled. And that word trouble, have you ever seen a horse throw his head and... That's what the word means. It's that idea. Jesus could be troubled by our struggles because He was truly loved. The next line that sketches the face of Jesus is found in the words, love is not provoked. Love is not provoked. Now Paul uses an unusual word in this phrase. It's used in only one other verse in the New Testament. In Acts 17-16 we read, Now while Paul waited for them at Athens, his spirit was provoked within him when he saw that that city was given over to idols. Now the way we would say this today is that Paul was offended by what he saw in Athens. And so part of what Paul is communicating in this phrase is that love is not ready to take offense. We've all met people that we must tiptoe around because they take offense so easily. Every word, every action may end up in a case that they bring before the Supreme Court, or at least it feels that. It's very easy in the culture in which we live today to learn this attitude. Because so many people seem to want to be victims today. They want to be offended. Because victims are a favored minority now. And a victim must be offended. But all of this is the opposite of agape love. Agape love is not concerned with my rights. It's concerned with the rights of the one that I love. Agape love rejects victim status. Agape love refuses to be provoked, irritated, offended. It turns the other cheek. If someone demands its coat, it gives its coat and its shirt gladly. Jesus displayed this trait in the Garden of Gethsemane when the soldiers came to take him away. Peter pulled his sword and Jesus said, put your sword away. I could call upon my Father and He would send twelve legions of angels to defend me. But Jesus refused to be put away. This phrase also may have to do just with common, ordinary, everyday anger. Some of the modern versions translate this phrase, love is not quick-tempered, or love is not easily angered. Again, when I am truly focused on what is best for the person that I love, then it is difficult for that person to anger me. One of the commentaries that I read in preparing for this message had a great comment in this regard. Let me read it. I quote, telling our wives or husbands that we love them is not convincing if we continually get upset and angry at what they say and do. Telling our children that we love them is not convincing if we often yell at them for doing things that irritate us and interfere with our own plans. It does no good to protest I lose my temper a lot, but it's all over in a few minutes. So is a nuclear bomb. A great deal of damage can be done in a very short time. Temper is always destructive, and even small temper bombs can leave much hurt and damage, especially when they explode on a regular basis. Lovelessness is the cause of temper. And love is the only cure. Verse 5 ends with one more line in this sketch of Jesus. Love thinks no evil. Love thinks no evil. Now the verb that Paul used in this phrase was very common in everyday usage in his day. In fact, the word is often used in the business world. It's found in business documents from that day that have been dug up by archaeologists. The word speaks of what an accountant or a bookkeeper does when he puts a transaction in a ledger. Why do we put transactions in a ledger? so that that information there is a permanent record of the transaction. And that's exactly the meaning here. Love does not keep a permanent record of a wrong that was transacted against. I've counseled married couples. I kind of informally hung out a shingle when I passed them in Pennsylvania. And I've counseled couples who, at least at one point, would have claimed to have loved one another, and yet they had huge ledgers in their hearts in which they recorded every wrong that their spouses had ever done against them. And when they argued, they would open those ledgers and they would share those transactions from the past out of the columns of those ledgers. I can't think of a way of acting that is more certain to keep two people separated, angry, and unhappy. If you keep a ledger like this in your heart, I hope you can read the title clearly in huge, bold letters, My Unhappiness. You see, keeping this kind of ledger in our hearts is the opposite of forgiveness. When we say, I forgive you, and we mean it, we're actually making a promise. We're saying, I release you from the debt that you owe me, and I have gone to the ledger, and I have removed the transaction so that I will not remember it anymore. It's not there for me to bring up to you. It's not there for me to bring up to your parents. It's not there for me to bring up to me or my best friend. It has been expunged from the ledger. Agape love knows how to forgive. It refuses to keep the ledger. And we know that Jesus loved in this way. I want you to use a little imagination with me. I want you to do a little thought experiment. Let's say you're traveling in a foreign country somewhere, and the police ride up, and they arrest you. And you're put on trial. You don't even understand the language. You don't really understand what's going on. But it's a kangaroo court. It's a sham trial. You have no defense attorney. The judge certainly doesn't understand you or anything about you. The testimony that's given is half-truths at best, if not outright lies. And in the end, in that kangaroo court, out of the sight of everyone, you are convicted and sentenced to die. naked and in the most shameless and excruciating way possible. Now if that were to happen to you, if that actually really happened to you, would that go down in your ledger? Would you be able to leave that transaction behind? Because all of that happened to Jesus. And he said, Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do. Father, I'm not writing it down in my ledger, and I do not want you to either. Love was born on the first Christmas day. And love, agape love, died for us in the person of Jesus. The two final lines in verse 6 in the drawing of Jesus form a couplet. They must be understood together. The first of them says, love does not rejoice in iniquity. Love does not rejoice in iniquity. And I like a couple of the other phrases that we've considered. This phrase, does not rejoice in iniquity or wrongdoing, can have more than one meaning. The most basic meaning is that when I love a person with agape love, I do not rejoice when they do wrong. I do not rejoice when they do wrong because I know that their sin will have negative consequences in their lives. Many of us have memorized Romans 6.23 which begins, the wages of sin is death. But I don't think we really believe what that verse says. The idea there is that sin, any sin, is always destructive in some way. And so if I see a person that I truly love with agape love sin, then I know that that person is being destroyed in some way, and that's going to cause me distress. So ask yourself, do you secretly rejoice when a co-worker is headed toward a divorce or when you see a police car arrive at a neighbor's house because it gives you the opportunity to feel superior, holier than thou? Are there times that you want people to fail so you can say, see, I told you, I told you. I've even heard of Christian spouses who want their partners to commit adultery so they can get out of marriage. There are many ways to rejoice in iniquity, but not if we truly love those who are involved with agape love. Love cannot take any pleasure in the downfall of another. Think of Jesus weeping over the coming destruction of Jerusalem because of their sins. That is how agape responds to the sins of others. And then we may apply this phrase with a second meaning. We rejoice in iniquity when we listen to gossip. Someone shares with us a delicious ear morsel. I love that phrase. I didn't make it up. I think it comes from an old purity. Someone shares a delicious ear morsel with us, how this person has failed, what that person has done that's so embarrassing. and we gobble it up and we enjoy every last bit of it. Agape love rejects that kind of talk. It does not enjoy it, but is rather grieved by it and refuses to listen to it, refuses to consume it. Can you imagine Jesus listening to gossip? What of us? What happened the last time somebody shared with you how badly another person was doing? Perhaps shared with you how they themselves had been badly treated by someone. How did you react? How did I react? How do you and I match up to this portrait of Jesus who refused to rejoice one another? And then the final phrase in verse 6, the only positive way of acting that we're going to address this morning. This is the last line in the sketch of Jesus that we'll take up today. Love rejoices in the truth. Love rejoices in the truth. Now, it can be a bit difficult to figure out what Paul means by that phrase. I mean, what does it mean to rejoice in the truth? Well, the key is to remember that this phrase and the former phrase are linked. They're a coupling. Love does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth. So in some way, rejoicing in the truth is a rejoinder to not rejoicing in iniquity. Well, the previous phrase had to do with the person that I love doing what is wrong. So it seems like this phrase must have the idea of a person doing what is right. This is how love reacts when it catches other people doing right. And the verb in the second half of the couplet is not actually the same verb as what is used in the first half. It's a little bit different word. And it has the idea of rejoicing with the truth. It has the idea of celebrating. Love celebrates when it learns the truth about another person, and it is positive, and it is good, and it is wonderful. Think of your Master, Jesus, at the Benesee. where he will say to his faithful followers, well done. Some of us just don't know what to do when we catch other people doing good things. We don't know how to say, well done. We don't know how to say, attaboy. Or my favorite, you da man. Listen, it is so much better, parents, for us to catch our children doing right and to praise them to the heavens than it is to catch them wrong and to have to discipline and punish them. And certainly better than tearing them down. We need to rejoice with truth every chance that we get. And I think it also may be legitimate to turn this idea around backwards. Remember the first phrase in this couplet had the idea of listening to gossip. If we love with agape love, then we do not listen to gossip. But this second phrase may mean that agape love can still handle the truth about somebody, even if it cannot help but hear the gossip. I mean, this is one of the horrible aspects of gossip. Once we have heard it, even if we didn't want to hear it, we can't unhear it. But agape can hear the worst about that person, can hear the truth, the bad truth, and yet still continue to want the best for them, still continue to do the best for them. When we love someone with Christ-like love, and someone begins to tell us bad things about another person, well, if we really love them, we need to plug our ears and walk out of the room. But, you know, sometimes that's not possible. And if we love with agape love, if we love with Christ-like love, then we can handle the truth about someone, even if it's the bad truth. Let me ask you, does Christ know the bad truth about you and me? You bet He does. He bore the shame, the disgrace, the punishment, for every last bad thing that we've ever done or ever will do and He still loves us and He still continues to minister to us. It's this aspect of agape love that I believe is the secret to a lasting marriage. Now, I believe that a good marriage has an element of eros love at the beginning, erotic love, in love, infatuation, love. It's spelled L-U-V. There's nothing wrong with that. I think that's part of the good marriage at the beginning, at least, if not longer. But at some point, the honeymoon is over. And at some point, you learn that I'm living with a sinner. You learn the truth, the bad truth. In agape love, If you truly love that person with Christ-like love, agape love, then you can embrace that truth. You can say, bring it on. It cannot kill my love for this person. It'll kill love, L-U-V. It'll kill it like that. But it will not kill agape. This is also the aspect of agape love that keeps people from bolting from a local church when they encounter Christians who aren't very lovely or lovable. Jesus said, they will know we are Christians by our agape. Agape is what enables us to love messy people. to admit the truth that they are messy, that they have messed up, and yet to continue to love them and continue to minister to them. Oh, how much this aspect of Christ-like love is needed if our church is going to grow and flourish and thrive. So I hope this morning that you've seen Jesus as perhaps you've never seen Him before. Indeed, love was born on that first Christmas day. Love became flesh in the person of Jesus, and because Jesus loved each of us with this kind of agape love, He went to the cross. Jesus was born in order to die. Jesus was born in order to bear the punishment of every sin that we commit. Or let me put it this way at the end of this message. Jesus died to bear the punishment for every time that we do not love with Adaptei life. Can you ask me to bow your heads and close your eyes please for just a moment? Are you certain that you have trusted Jesus to bear your sins? Have you laid hold of Jesus and said, Jesus, I believe you died for me and I want what you did on the cross to be effective for me. I want my sins to be forgiven. Lord Jesus, forgive me. Are you certain that you've made that kind of a transaction with Jesus? Have you said to Jesus, Lord Jesus, I turn from my own way, I turn from my sin, I will follow you, Lord Jesus. If you've not made that twofold decision, you need to this morning. That's why Jesus came. That's why love was born on that first Christmas day. For someone here, you need to pray a simple prayer, Lord Jesus, I believe you died in my place to bear my sin. Lord Jesus, forgive all of my sin once and for all. I turn from my sin, Jesus. I'm going to follow you. Would you pray that simple prayer in your heart right now?