Good morning everybody. Welcome. We have plenty of visitors. You are definitely welcome. We shouldn't call you visitors, maybe guests is a more appropriate term. If you have your Bibles, please open them to Ephesians chapter 6. We're in the final chapter, Ephesians chapter 6. We're going to just be focusing on the first three verses. This is a good service, parents, to have brought your little ones too. These will be good verses. Hopefully you can commit to memory. And also they, by God's grace, will both commit to memory and put into practice. Fathers, if you can be here next week. Parents, if you can be here next week. It will be hopefully beneficial. But this morning, we're going to look at children. We're going to look at Paul's commandment to children. Let's pray. Father, please we ask for your glory would you send the Holy Spirit in his fullness to open up eyes and unstop ears to grant new hearts to receive with meekness the implanted word which is able to save our souls as we saw in James this morning that it's through your word that you grant the new birth oh father that that might happen even as we were singing blessed Jesus we pray that our little ones would seek you while they're young father would you help by the aid of your spirit, me to proclaim the gospel even in Ephesians chapter 6 verses 1 to 3. We pray for those, Lord, who are hurting, those, Lord, who are halting, those who are burdened, those who have many anxieties and cares. I pray that they would look to Christ this morning and they would be, as it were, alleviated of those and reminded of your great love for sinners, Jesus, and your desire to save them to the uttermost. Father we pray help us open up your word this morning. Would you impart light? Would you impart illumination? Would it sink deep Lord into the very fabric of our beings and as we saw again this morning? May we not be? hearers only who forget but doers of Your Word, and may we be blessed in doing it as we trust and obey. Father, help us as we seek to honor You through Your Son. Holy Spirit, do so as we open up the book. We ask in Jesus' name. Amen. Let me read the verses this morning that we'll be unpacking. One of the dangers of having a mind that never stops and waking up early on Sunday morning is all kinds of illustrations and pictures flood into my mind. and what I was thinking what we're going to do this morning was very similar to what I did when I was in dentistry and we'd work on dead people or cadavers on bodies and we'd be very precise with our tools and we'd have to carve up what was presented before us and I was remembering A Serbian girl who had much to prove and she was always in there just flailing away. And there would be chunks of flesh sort of flying at us and we'd have to dodge them. And I don't want us to do that this morning. I want us to be very careful. And as much honor is given to a body that we were working as dentists, so much more the Word of God. I do want to dissect it, but in our dissecting I don't want to forget that this is God's Word. That girl from Serbia had forgotten that the one we were dissecting was made in the image of God. And this is the very Word of God, and so I don't want to tread lightly on it. And I pray that God will impress this, especially children, upon our hearts. So children, I may make you feel uncomfortable. I'm going to try to make as much eye contact as possible this morning. You have no idea how often we pray on our Wednesdays that God and His mercy might cause our children to be born again to a new and a living hope in Christ at an early age. That you would not be stuck in all kinds of ruts like some of us who were saved later in life were. That in God's grace you might be spared from all the follies that we had to go through. I pray that God, in His mercy this morning, would even save some of you children who came into this auditorium, as you will, dead. Remember that we're not Christians because we're born to Christian parents. We become Christians when we believe in the Gospel, when we personally, individually believe in a personal, individual Savior. The saying is kind of quaint, but God has no grandchildren. Children, you must come to Christ the same way you're believing parents have come to Christ. The text. Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother. This is the first commandment with a promise. That it may go well with you, and that you may live long in the land. It's God's Word. And you have no idea how rich it is. You're thinking, OK, this will be the first short sermon He ever gives. I promise you it won't be short because this is infinitely rich. We remember the context that Paul is, as it were, showing for us what the new humanity is to live like. The new household we saw in Ephesians 2, that God is building a temple in Christ through the Spirit. A new humanity. And what Paul is doing is he's taking the household codes of that time and he's transforming them by the gospel. You see, back in ancient times, in Paul's time, there was a set of household codes that was to be implemented for the good of society, for the polis, for the city. The Greeks were really all about a community that was living together and functioning harmoniously for the well-being of the greater whole. And what Paul is saying is that's what the gospel is to do on a spiritual level. That God in his mercy pulls all kinds of people out of this world and he forms a new household, he forms a new humanity, he forms a new polis, a new city. And we each have our parts individually as members. And what Paul is going to do is he's going to transform the most basic fundamental rudimentary element of the society and that's the family. You don't need to be a Christian to see that. You understand that the world is going awry because the family has already gone awry. And as we saw in months foregone, that Satan doesn't so much attack individuals, but he attacks families. He attacks philosophies that undermine the centrality of families. And so Paul, not surprisingly, is going to speak to us as families of how we are to be formed and fashioned, and how we are to live in light of the Gospel, or in the language that we saw in Ephesians 4.1, to live in a manner worthy of the calling to which we have been called. Very simple, we have who is being addressed, what is being addressed, and why they are being addressed. Or who is being commanded, what they are being commanded, and why they are being commanded. This is important. Children submitting to parents has societal implications. Children, if you do not learn how to submit to your parents at a young age, you will not learn how to submit to any authority. Most importantly, God. So parents, you might want to check out, but I encourage you not to. You need to pray that God would enable you, as those who have been entrusted over your kids, to instill in them this understanding of what it means to submit to authority. Because we're going to see that God, as it were, has put in proxy, has put in the position of Himself, parents who represent Him. And we're going to see the radical implications of that when a child refuses to submit to the parental authority bestowed upon the parents by God. Ultimately, they're rebelling against God Himself. Rather than seeing children submitting To parents we see the opposite, which reminds us of Romans chapter 1 and 2 Timothy chapter 2. That the last days as it were have come and godlessness will increase and we will see children who disobey parents, who strike their parents. We're going to see that as God gives a nation over to itself in Romans 1, three times we see that one of the implications of God's judgment upon a nation is disobedient children. You don't need to be a prophet or a preacher to see this. All you need to do is go to Superstore as you go and get your groceries. Rather than seeing children, out of reverence for Christ, submitting to those whom God has put over them, we see them calling the shots. And we see a radical reversal of God's intended order. Rather than children submitting to parents, we see parents submitting to children. Watch what happens when the children are sitting in the carts. And the parents are buying things and the kid doesn't get something they want. They throw a tantrum. Rather than the parent saying, little Johnny, you need to shut up. And you need to smarten up or you're going out to the car for a weapon. You know what happens? The parent starts to juggle. What can I get you? Will a chocolate bar make you happy? Will this make you happy? What aisle should we go to? The child is bullying the parent and the parent is submitting now. to a false authority, not invested. And so what we see is that God's created order is being thwarted and distorted. It's being turned on its head. And as we saw long ago, that God has set rules in order. And when we follow those rules, good things, order happens. But when we rebel against God's order, bad things happen. It's no surprise that we have all kinds of juvenile delinquents. It's because from an early age they're being trained to say, I am a king or queen and I sit on the throne. Everyone and everything exists for me. Rather than learning what the Bible teaches, I am a created being under the authority of others. Whether parents, or teachers, or civil authorities, but ultimately God. I submit to higher authorities. And we see the exact opposite in the mentality of children being churned out into this world. See how the gospel gives us a beautiful picture of everything? This is why we should plead for revival, because we see our society in complete disarray. And it's only getting worse as the family is bombarded and attacked by the evil one and all of his godless philosophies that the church is swallowing whole. Rather than leading well, parents ask for the children's approval and sanction when decisions are to be made. What do you want to eat for supper tonight? What do you want to wear today? I'm not saying you need to be tyrants, but understand that when you're letting your kids call all the shots You're embedding into their fabric that they are in charge of everything and every decision ultimately comes before their scepter, whether it's extended or not. This is tragic because it breaks the order God has originally and intentionally put into creation. It's dangerous because children end up believing that they're sovereign. Parents, I want you to pray about this. Do not instill this mentality into your children that they're sovereign, because what you're doing is deceiving them. It might be convenient, and it might thwart the temper tantrum, but what you're doing is deceiving them into believing a lie. The Bible says there's only one sovereign, one potentate, and his name is Jesus Christ. It's not the name of your child. It's Jesus. Chaos results when this order is broken. They begin to think that their parents have been created for them. I remember when I was in seminary and I was serving through a church and there was another brother, his name was David, and they had their first son. And they're just saying how the sun from birth just assumes that they are the sun, S-U-N, of their own universe. And everything sort of gravitates around them. All the planets, like the parents and all those various things, orbit around that little child. And I remember him saying to me, he said, my child assumes that this is what has happened. Oh great, God created parents for me, as if the child was eternal. And parents were brought in for the parent, when really it's the opposite, that the parents existed, and the child now has to submit to the parents. Oh how we need the gospel to reorient our gaze and the way we understand things, the way they happen. Parents, I pray that you will instill into your children godly obedience to authorities, submission and honor and respect. These are things that were a little more common in common grace 50 years ago, but you don't see it anymore. This is a problematic thing if they don't learn to obey and honor authorities because When they go to school, they assume their teachers are their slaves and not their masters. It's problematic when they play with other kids. What happens when you get two bullies together? You exist for me. No, you exist for me. It's problematic when they get a job. How dare a boss require me to do what I signed and said I would do? What gives him the authority to tell me to work 8 hours? You see? They begin to trash their boss because the boss is just expecting them to do what they hired them to do. And yet, I hear this complaint all the time. When they get a ticket, they call the cop a pig. Instead of understanding that God has put that authority there. It's problematic when two people get married like this. This is the problem. This is why divorce is so prevalent. You have two people who believe the other exists for them. It's like two vacuum cleaners getting married. That's the problem. Basically, children who believe this live in a make-believe world where they are the final authority and ultimate sovereign who runs the show and calls the shots. And nothing could be more tragically wrong. No wonder our kids with this mentality will grow up hating the gospel when it is preached to them. When we go out on the streets and we declare there's a sovereign who's going to call everyone to account, people gnash their teeth. Why? Because they believe they are sovereign. They believe the only throne that matters in this world is their own throne. And so when we tell them of a true and a living and a sovereign God, who's going to call them to give an account of every thoughtless word and every sinful deed they've done? They rebel against it. I pray parents, your children will not have that mentality when they hear the gospel. I pray they would understand that all authority is given by God and He is the ultimate authority with whom we will have to reckon with. Parents, if your kids are running the show right now, you are deceiving them. I know, it's very easy. I'm a parent and I know how easy it is to shut them up when they're crying and let them have their way and become their little jester and juggle for them and try to bribe them. Oh, what damage I do to them. I'm enabling them to believe a lie. I am false advertising. I am preaching a false gospel to them. So I want you to be very ruthless in a good way and very mindful of the message you're communicating to your children about authority. If you're letting them call the shots, how do I know? Just listen the next time you eat with them at the table. You're going to know who calls the shots. A lot of children run the show at dinner time, family time. They dictate how long the meal is, if there's going to be a family devotion. They dictate everything. And if you let them get away with that, you're letting them believe a lie and you're deceiving them. If you need to repent, parents, then do so. Repentance is an amazing grace. It's a word we cringe at. And yet all repentance is doing is turning from death and turning to life. It's a good thing. Repentance is a glorious thing and may God grant it to us this morning, that the gospel promises forgiveness to us whose parents have screwed up. The gospel promises fresh starts and new beginnings for failures like me. For parents who have maybe got it wrong and you're halfway in the middle and you're like, what can I do? Cry out to God, He giveth more grace. This is eternally and infinitely important. It's not just, oh I want to have a good structured society so everything flows well. It's eternally and infinitely important that we instill this mindset into our children. Why? Because as we saw, just as the relationship between husband and wife is a picture of the gospel, elsewhere when you read in the Bible that the relationship between a parent and their children is also a picture of the gospel. Turn to Proverbs chapter 3. And I'm going to quote this. I don't mind reading it twice, because the first verse that came to mind was the book of Hebrews. Now Proverbs is right after Psalms. Psalms is about the midway point of the Bible. So if you find Psalms, just keep working towards the right until you find the book of Proverbs. And it's chapter 3. Verses 11 and 12. Good verses to put on your fridge. So when the kid's acting up, you can just be like, My son or my daughter. Okay, the book of Proverbs is a whole bunch of teachings given mostly by Solomon to his son. They're practical for everyone, but ultimately he understands the importance of training up his children. And I'm guilty of this. He doesn't just plop him in front of Netflix, or plop him in front of the TV. He actually invests and sacrifices his time to tell him things like this. My son, do not despise the Lord's discipline, or be weary of His reproof. For the Lord reproves him whom He loves, as... That's the key word. As a father, the son in whom He delights. OK, now let's read this in Hebrews chapter 12. That's in the New Testament towards the end. You find Revelation and just keep working back until you find the book of Hebrews. It's in chapter 12. Okay, and I'm going to read in verse 5 and following. Okay, I'm saying that this relationship between parents and children is important, not just for a structured society, but because it is a picture of how God relates to us. And how children relate to their parents is really a picture of how they relate to God. A child who is rebellious and disobedient towards mom and dad is ultimately a child who is rebellious and disobedient against God Almighty. Hebrews chapter 12, verse 5. And have you forgotten the exhortation that addresses you as sons? My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord, nor be weary when reproved by Him. For the Lord disciplines the one He loves and chastises every son whom He receives. And then he offers a bit of commentary in verse 7. It is for discipline that you have to endure. Do you understand that, parents, that when you discipline your children, I know that's next week, but you're teaching them gospel principles of what God does for the holiness of His children. He's teaching us to endure. God is treating you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline? If you are left without discipline, in which all of God's children have participated, then you are illegitimate children and not sons. Besides this, we have had earthly fathers who disciplined us and we respected them. Shall we not much more be subject to the Father of spirits and live? For they disciplined us for a short time as seemed best to them, but he disciplines us for our good that we may share in his holiness. For the moment, all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceable fruit of not just of a stable society, but of righteousness. The peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained. We're going to see that word next week. Buy it. And so how a family actually lives together, not just a husband and a wife, but if God has blessed you with children or will bless you with children, that this nuclear family is very important. And it will help you, as it were, to advertise to the world abroad how God relates to His children. He loves them and He disciplines them for their good, and for their righteousness, and for their discipline. And they might live in a manner worthy of Jesus Christ. No wonder Paul can tell us in Ephesians chapter 6, Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. That's why Paul says it. Because it's a picture of the Gospel. So my first point. Who is addressed? Very simple. You don't need to be a scholar. Who is addressed? Children. Children are addressed. The Greek word tekton. It doesn't refer so much to age, but rather to relationship. Though this could refer to any child, it could refer to me and my parents, ultimately the context, Paul is saying, for children who are under the roofs of their parents. So children, any age, not just 3-year-olds, not just 10-year-olds, if you live under your parents' roof, this is for you. It doesn't matter how old you are, you're underneath the authority, the umbrella, as it were, of your parents. which leads to a practical application. Parents, in light of this passage, one of the most unloving things you can do is let a rebellious, disobedient child remain in your house. You're communicating to them, again, a false gospel. Parents, Your children under your roof are called not just by Paul or by Ryan, but by God to obey. And if they refuse to, let them out of the house. Don't hate them, but get them out. They need to understand that there are implications to disobedience. Okay, that's the hardest thing to hear in the world. But if you have a 16 or 17 year old who refuses to, who's aggressive, who spits at and mocks your authority, show them the door. The most unloving thing you can do is let them live in your house and mock God's authority under your approval. That's a freebie. It's not in the text, but I thought about that. This is for children under the roof. If they're under your roof, they abide by your rules. Does that sound dictatorial? Maybe. But hopefully I'm talking to gospel parents who are filled with the Spirit, who love their children. Okay? This word, obey. Oh, sorry, I'm getting ahead of myself. Don't get too excited. It is interesting that Paul also addresses children here, not parents. Children under the roof of the houses, which assumes another practical application. This is why we like to have children in our worship services. Paul didn't say, okay, parents, Children. So, I'm looking at the wolves, and I'm looking at Jared and my kids, and... Kids! Children! Look at me! Renee! Obey your mom and your dad! Kayla! Obey your parents! Okay? Don't just wait for your dad to say it. The pastor, preaching from the Word of God, says, Children! Obey your parents! You too, Maddy! I always make her blush. This is why we want to have our families together under the Word. Okay, I know it's uncomfortable for some of us, but fight for it. Let your three-year-old and your four-year-old squirm. That's okay. Let them sit under the Word. Sit under it as a family. And then the parents will know what they can teach their kids. And the kids will be able to say, yeah, I heard that from the Word of God. And it's not just mom or dad trying to be a tyrant, to pull rank on me. Actually, they're just applying what I heard as well from the Bible. Who is addressed? Children. What is commanded? Two things. The first is obey, the second is honor. Children, obey your parents. In the Greek word, hoopakouo. means to literally listen under. Okay, verse 21, hupotasso, means to submit under. Submitting to one another out of Christ. Hupotasso. Children, you hupotasso by hupakuo. I'm speaking in tongues, let me interpret that. You are to submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. What does that look like, parents? Submit to your parents by obeying them. Come under their rank by coming under their words. Very simple. You come under their rank by coming under their words. You not only listen, you obey them. Children, the Bible says you are to willingly and obediently put yourselves under the words and authority of your parents. So when you say, come here, I have something to say, the child runs away, they're disobeying you, they need to listen to what you have to say. It's a present tense. Keep on obeying. It's not just obey when you want something. I really want a new iPod. Or maybe that's passé. I want a new iPhone. I can't believe like 10 year olds have iPhones. Anyways. You don't just obey so you can get something. You're supposed to obey all the time. You're supposed to obey whether there's a reward offered or not. You obey for the sake of obeying. It denotes not only continual obedience, but absolute obedience. So you don't pick and choose. You don't sort of put a scale up. Okay, this is what mom and dad said. Let me just sort of weigh that out. Okay, dad, I'll do 40% of what you asked. That's not what the Bible says. The Bible says that you obey promptly, continually, and you also obey... what was the fancy word I used again? Absolutely. You don't get to vote. For all of us Democrats, God's kingdom is a little bit different. God doesn't give us a vote when He declares truth. We accept it, and we obey it, or we don't. God doesn't say, what do you think about accepting Christ as the only Savior of the world? I don't know. How about this God? No. It's true. And so some of the kids, when it's time to eat, you eat what is put before you. Anyways, we'll see if this is put in practice for our community groups. Of course, my girls are probably going to not eat for the first time ever, but children, you are to obey. You have to obey all the time. Parents, let me say a word to you. It's not enough. for your children to appear to be obedient when it's convenient for you. You know what? I'm guilty of this. And sometimes all I want my kids to do is obey in public. You know how that is? It's church. Oh God, please let them just not freak out today. Tomorrow's okay. It's not okay! It's not okay if my kids freak out on Monday, but if their little princess is on Sunday. Because God is watching all the time. So parents, don't split reality into two parts. A sacred and a secular. As if going to church, you need to be good. But the rest of the time, you can be a little devil. What you're doing is you're putting a division between the lives. And you're teaching them hypocrisy. Okay, so yes we want them to obey on Sundays when people are watching, but oh that they might obey when no one is watching other than God. Parents, don't be content with Sunday morning obedience. Pray that God would give them a new heart. Just as wives are to spit to their own husbands, children are to obey their own parents. Okay, so our community group, you know, if I sit down like, put my feet up, Dayson-y, you know, give me a foot massage. I can't do that. Tony can do that. No, honestly, we have to be very careful. One of the things that irks me is, you know, some family, they come over and they start treating my kids as if they're their kids. And they're getting mad at them. No, my kids are to submit to the authority God has placed over them. So if you come to my house, don't start ordering my kids around. Talk to me, and hopefully I will be able to talk to my children. Children, obey your parents. Why? MacArthur says this, because parents stand in the gap, so to speak, between children and God. I don't know if you've ever thought about that, mom and dad. You're a mediator. You represent, as it were, God to your kids and your kids to God. That's the priesthood of parents. Okay, you act as a prophet, a priest and a king to your kids. Parents are God's stewards, He says, His proxy authority for their children, who are simply loaned to them in trust by their own Heavenly Father. Children, obey, as Colossians 3 would say, in everything your parents. Continually, absolutely, without reserve. Then He modifies it, and this is where the Gospel comes in. This is where I want to get personal with you kids. Children, obey your parents. What does the next word say? In the Lord. And every commentator I read agreed that Paul is talking to Christian children here. Every time you see that word, encurio, in the Lord, or in Christ, or in Him, it's always referring to believers. Go and read Ephesians chapter 1. In whom, in Him, in Christ. Right off the beginning, Paul, an apostle of Christ, by the will of God, to the saints who are in Ephesus and are believers in Christ Jesus. So this is where we get personal. The NLT would translate it this way. Children obey your parents because you belong to the Lord. Which begs the question, children, are you in the Lord? There's a big difference between being in the building and being in Christ. There's one thing between belonging to a church and belonging to Christ. There's something we pray for. We pray for you kids, that you would be in Christ. That you would not just be merely religious. And that your obedience or the apparent obedience to your parents is superficial. God sees through it. It's like the sacrifices of Isaiah chapter 1. God sees through it. Are you in the Lord? Like the rest of humanity, all of our children are born in Adam. And they need to be transferred from in Adam to in Christ, which happens as the gospel is proclaimed, Ephesians 1. And you, when you heard the word of salvation, the gospel, and believed in Christ, you are sealed with the Spirit. Not until then are you in Christ, until you believe the gospel. Not just heard the gospel. Children, look. Please, for God's sake, look. You need to hear and you need to believe the gospel. I know you'd rather be texting or playing video games, but this is life and death. You will not be able to obey your parents the way God requires you to unless you have power from above. Unless you are in Christ. Unless you are filled with the Spirit. You cannot be filled with the Spirit if you're not a Christian. You must be in Christ. You cannot obey your parents in the Lord if you're not in the Lord. Ephesians 5 says that by nature, so in chapter 2 he says that we're dead. And in Ephesians 5a, he says, you once were darkness, but after you believed in the gospel, you became light in the Lord. Are you light in the Lord? Because you cannot obey your parents in the Lord if you are in the darkness. Those are uncomfortable moments, aren't they? I'm willing to get uncomfortable with you, because I believe there's a place called heaven and hell. I believe there's a God who cares about your soul. A God who sent His Son into the world who would die on the cross for children. That children would be spared from God's wrath and also spared from a futile life like the Gentiles of Ephesians 4.17 left. I don't want that for any of you kids. This is not me just getting excited and animated to impress visitors or to be a good preacher. This is a heavy burden God laid on my heart this morning. Children, you need a new heart to do this from the heart. Do you have a new heart? Have you been born again? Are you a new creature in Christ? Obedience to God's commands is a fruit of the heart. And I love it when providence works out. So Tony picked for the call to worship 1 John chapter 5, which Our verse is in my notes, Tony. God's commands are not grievous to those who have been born again, who love God. This is what it means to love God, to obey His commandments. If you love God, you will obey His commands. Jesus said that three times in John 14 and 15. If you love Me, you will keep My commands. Children, honor your parents. Obey your parents. That's a command. You can't do it unless you're born again. Unless God gives you a new heart to love God and thus be able to obey out of love. Romans 8.3 says that you need the Spirit to be able to keep the Law. As we're going to see, Paul is quoting the law here. You can't keep the law in the flesh. It's one of Paul's major emphases in Galatians and Romans and parts of 2 Corinthians. You can't. You need a new heart. But the beautiful thing is that Ezekiel 11 and Ezekiel 36, God promised to a disobedient nation that a time was coming when He would give His elect a new heart. And that having a new heart, they would be able to keep His commands and not blaspheme His name. And they would live in the land and be a blessing. to those around them. It all comes down to children. Do you have a new heart? Do you love obeying your parents or you just do it? Obedience is the fruit of a new heart. Obedience flows from a spirit wrought love to God. Those who are new creations in Christ will submit, will obey and will honor their parents because they reverence and fear Christ. Ephesians 5.21 This is one of the first things that happened to me after I got converted, by the way. So here's a 21-year-old, just dropped everything God had ever, or everything I'd ever worked for, for God. This is my fourth year of university, and God kept laying it on my heart, before you settle anything else, Ryan, you need to pick up the phone and you need to do something. You know what I did? I called my mom and asked her to forgive me. for all the times I had disrespected her and laughed at her and dishonored her. I didn't do that to be saved. I did that because God had given me a new heart. Jeremiah 31 says that when God gives His people a new heart, His commands will be written on that heart. I didn't need to have some preacher browbeating me. God said, Ryan, how you lived is inconsistent with who you are now. Make things right. And so I called my mom. You know what God convicted me to do on Friday as I was preparing this? I called my dad and I apologized to him for one thing that I am so ashamed of. I'm not going to get emotional, just pull your strings. And I want to show you the power of the gospel. When I was a teenager, I looked my dad in the face and I told him off. He said he'd forgotten. I had never forgotten it. That's the power of the gospel. You know what Proverbs 20 says? He who curses his father or mother, his lamp will be put out in utter darkness. My paraphrase, such people who dishonor and curse their parents go to hell. And that's the power of the gospel. That he takes God-hating, parent-rejecting rebels like me, and he gives them new hearts. And I said to my dad, I said, you know what dad? I love you. And I honor you, I respect you, and I want to obey you. It's evangelism. I didn't give him four spiritual laws or that jazz. I said, God has made me different, Dad. He's given me a new heart. He's written his command on my heart, and that command is to honor you. And I said, Dad, I want you to know I honor you. My dad's not a believer. And because God has given me a new heart, I honor Him. Kids, do you honor your parents? Can you honestly say, I honor my mom and my dad? If you don't, God have mercy on you and give you a new heart this morning. Parents, do you pray this? If you listen to how our kids mimic our prayers, you know what we pray for them almost every night? I know Tony does with his kids, I think. God, give Elisha. Give Abigail, give Carissa, give Shiloh a new heart if they don't have one yet. Otherwise, we're just playing games and raising religious little law keepers who are actually law breakers. Christ bore my cursing of my dad on the cross and I want to offer you that hope, children. You don't need to be a 16-year-old to dishonor your parents. You can be 5, 6, 7, 18. You may have dishonored your parents, you may have laughed at them, ridiculed them, you may have reviled them, you may have even cursed them. God saved me. He'll save you too if you ask Him to forgive you. Children, obey your parents in the Lord. Are you in the Lord? Second, honor your father and mother. It's parallel to obey, so I'm not going to get too much into it. It's just another way of unpacking it. But this is what I take away from it. You will never truly obey your parents unless you truly honor your parents. Again, it gets to the heart. You can do all kinds of things in a superficial, outward way. But you can, as it were, obey your parents. And it reminds me of the story. I don't know if it's a story or if it's some kind of parable. Harry told me of the kid in school. The parent said, sit down. And so the kid said, okay. He said, on the outside I sitteth, but on the inside I standeth. This is why we need to pray that God would give our kids new hearts. It's not enough just for outward moral conformity. Becoming good little Christian kids. We want God to work because only God can enable us as sinners to honor our parents out of reverence for Christ. I don't want my girls to say, OK, on the outside I deal with what daddy says, on the inside I hate him and what he tells me to do. This is why we preach the gospel. This is why I'm not content with most churches saying, here's 10 ways to be a better family, and never mention Christ, or the gospel, or the necessity of divine empowerment through the Spirit. Children, honor your father and your mother. This is a hard issue. Obedience deals with our actions, whereas honor deals with our attitudes. What's your attitude towards your parents, kids? It's good. I know a lot of you aren't looking at me. That's okay. I hope you actually, you're saying, God, test me. Oh, that I might examine myself. 2 Corinthians 35. Oh, that I might not just be a Christian when others are watching, but inwardly, I don't care about my parents. Children, obey your parents and the Lord. Children, honor your father and your mother. The Greek word timao, that's where we get timei. Timothei, it's an honoring of God. So if you name your child Timothy, we need some more boys in the congregation. Timothy would be a good name. God-honorer. That's what it means, timao. It means this. It means to set a price on, value, estimate, revere. It was used in secular Greek of what you would do when you're like, here's a nice gold watch, or here's a nice whatever, and you value it. And God is saying, value your parents more than anything else, other than Christ. In an earthly sense, set a value, esteem, a high price on your parents. More important than being cool with your friends, more important than wearing the latest trend, more important than having the latest cell phone. Don't honor those things above your parents. Your parents are far more important. In Greek thought, timē was the proper recognition a man enjoyed in the community because of his office, position or rank. I'm not showing off to you by quoting Greek. A man in Greek society was honored because of his position. And this goes back to what I've said. for wives and their husbands. Your husband might not deserve honor. Kids, you might not think your parents deserve honor. But what I want you to understand is God has put your parents over you. And you need to recognize that status. You need to recognize what God has bestowed to them. Don't just look at your parents, look at the office which God has given them. So, in our day, you know what we esteem? Doctors, lawyers, businessmen. That's what happened in James 2. You know who Christians are to esteem? You know who children, as Christians, are to esteem? Not Justin Bieber, and not all these clowns. I know you don't, Jake. I wasn't hinting. Though I do want to check out your playlist after the service to double check. But we're to esteem our parents. They're to be our role models. But they're not good looking like! God has placed them above you. Esteemed them. Recognized their office, their position, their status. People in Greek times thus received their time, their honor, in proportion to the sphere of influence he or she controlled. You know what's the most important sphere of influence in your life, children? Your parents. Even more than your teacher, your boss, or your friends. Don't worry about what your friends say. Proverbs 1. Listen to what your parents say. If your parents are Christians, listen to them. Obey them. Esteem them. Honor them. Children. Your view of your parents, now that you know the truth, will reflect, in reality, your view of God. God has put your parents over you? I don't care about my parents! I don't know if you'll ever say it like that. What you're saying is, God, I don't care that you've put them over me. You say my parents are best for me? You say that my parents are my authority? No. You're not rebelling against your parents at that moment. Next time you're rebelling against your parents, kids, I pray the Spirit will crack your heart and realize, I'm rebelling against God. And you will immediately cry out for forgiveness. And you will beat your chest and say, God have mercy on me, the sinner. Who has commanded children? What have they commanded? Obey. Honor. Why? The first thing Paul says, is this right? This is right. Uh-oh. This was a common phrase. that pagans used in their time. In the Greco-Roman world, they'd say that it's right for children to obey their parents, which reminds us that even in common grace, we understand that when children are disobeying parents, even unbelievers, there's something irksome when they see a little child spitting at his parents or raising their fists. You don't need to be a believer, a Christ follower to be offended by that. Even in the pagan world they understood in common grace that children ought to respect their parents. Which shows us really how our society has become so degraded and distorted and depraved that even we understand when kids are attacking their parents and laughing at them and mocking them we understand as a civilization how wicked we are. This is why we should pray out for God to have mercy on our country. The revival would break out and God would save children from the inside out. That they would honor their parents instead of smite them and laugh at them. Not only was it an important word in the Greco-Roman world, it was a very important word in the Judeo-Christian world. Dikaios. It's where we get justification from. Righteousness. I'm not saying that you earn righteousness, but what it's saying is we are declaring what God commanded right. When children obey their parents, we are saying God's order is right. It is just. It is fitting. Which leads us to our second point. Okay? Why should you obey? It's right. Society will thrive better. But ultimately it's right because God said so. Okay, Romans 2 talks about general relation written on our heart. But this is specific and supernatural revelation because God's going to quote the Ten Commandments here. Children, why should you obey? Why should you honor? One, it's right. Two, you should do so because it's what God says. It's the first commandment with a promise. Let's read. Children, obey your parents and the Lord for this is right. Verse 2. Honor your father and mother. This is the first suggestion with a promise. Like, I thought you knew Greek? I do, I'm just trying to wake you up from your slumber. It's the first commandment with a promise. And Paul is quoting Exodus chapter 20 and Deuteronomy chapter 5, where God gives the Ten Commandments. Which makes me think this, ultimately such obedience and respect for one's appearance is right, because God has specifically commanded it in His Word. This is not some angry pastor telling you to be a good moral citizen as a child. God is saying to you this morning, children, I am God. Obey your parents. I have spoken. Time for the benediction. Let's go. That should be enough. God says it. And so if we don't want to obey it, it shows that really we don't have a reverence or respect for God and His Word. If you were to read the Ten Commandments, you would realize that there's what they call two tables. There's a vertical table, where we are, as it were, to relate vertically with God. And then there's a horizontal table, where we relate to one another in community. And every scholar said this, and I never realized this until I studied it. It was quite profound, at least to me. I'm a simpleton. Things that are simple can be quite profound. He said that there's a place of priority between the first and the second table. So the first is honoring God, and the second is honoring God by how you deal with relationships. And what merges the two is your parents. It's the bridge between the two tables. Every commentator said it. Let me just read it, because I have confused you. It says this, in the Decalogue, the ten words, and even within the whole Pentateuch, P.T. O'Brien says, the command to honor one's parents has pride of place among the horizontal commands. It provides a hinge between the first four commands towards God, which deal with His holiness, and The remaining commandments, in that the parents are to be honored, stand in the place of God and mediate His will to the entire household. Did you catch that? It's not an afterthought in the mind of God who spoke audibly to the people of Israel in the Ten Commandments. This is not a trifling issue to disobey your parents. And if you were to read Exodus 21, To disobey your parents under the old covenant came with what? The death penalty. Just had a bad day. It was a slip-up. It's never a slip-up because what proceeds out of our mouth comes from our heart. And with this priority in Exodus 20, we understand why God would say capital punishment for those who curse the mother or the father because to do so is to curse God. Make how you relate to your parents a whole lot more significant. Choose your words carefully, children, when you're talking to and addressing your parents. The importance, he says, of the parent-child relationship is so great that this imagery is applied to the relationship between God and His people. God is like a father and we are like His children, as we saw in Hebrews 12. Parents, Don't take this lightly. I'm telling your kids not to take it lightly. Parents, don't let your kids, if your kids curse you or they disobey you, get on your face and plead with God to save them. Because if they were under the old covenant, they should be stoned to death for what they have just done. Don't treat it lightly. The first reason we're to obey and honor is that it is right. The second, it is a commandment with a promise. These promises are that it might go well with you and that you might live long in the land. That it might go well with you refers to quality of life. That you might live long in the land refers to quantity. I'll quickly paraphrase all of the studies I've done. God promises in Exodus 20, in the Ten Commandments, and in Deuteronomy 5, when He reiterates the Ten Commandments, that God does reward obedience. You should obey your parents because it comes with a promise. It's the first commandment with a promise. And the promise is what? That it might go well with you. And providentially I'm reading through the book of Deuteronomy as part of my daily Bible readings. And it's this reoccurring phrase, not just to kids, but to everybody in Deuteronomy 4 and 5 and 6 and following. Obey me, that you might live long in the land and it might go well with you. That God's blessing would be upon you. Children, if you're disobeying and dishonoring your parents, you can never expect God's blessing upon your life. Never. God never rewards disobedience. And so obey your parents. Jesus Christ said, I've come into this world that you might have life and that abundantly. Honor your parents and you will experience the abundance of Christ's grace. It's very simple. Just as in the Old Testament, children who honored and obeyed their parents were blessed with the promise of a full life, so too in the New Covenant, this general principle holds true for obedient Christian children. Obey your parents. One of the promises, that it might go well with you, that you might flourish. The second, that you might live long in the land. And I'm going to disagree with most of the commentators I read, and I'm going to follow the ESV study bible. A lot of people just said, well this is literal, it just means you'll live a long life, for the most part. And then I began to think about most of the heroes that I read, like Robert Murray McShane, and David Brainerd, and Jonathan Edwards, and Charles Spurgeon. They died at a relatively young age. And so the ESV Bible is, I think, or the study Bible is correct, along with a man named Frank Thielman. He says that Ephesians is full of Pauline eschatology, which is a fancy, nerdy way of saying that Paul is talking about the end times so often. And I truly believe that children who obey their parents show evidence that they are Christians, that Christians will be given the new heavens and the new earth. You will live long, not in Israel or Palestine. You will live long in the new heavens and the new earth. It's a picture of this new heart that wants to obey God. And God says, if you obey your parents, you will be part of the new heavens and the new earth, wherein dwelleth righteousness. We will bask in the glory that we read about in Isaiah 60 and we read about in Revelations 21 and 22. Children, obey your parents. If you don't, you have no claim upon the new heavens and the new earth. Jesus will say, depart from me. I never knew you. Yeah, you came to church with them and you knew all the God talk, but you were a worker of iniquity. Depart from me. You, you obeyed. Come, come, enter. I've prepared a place for you, for my children. And God's children are those who obey their earthly parents. Conclusion. Before Exodus 20, Paul quotes the Ten Commandments in Exodus 20. In chapter 19, God says, I've saved you. I've pulled you out of Egypt with a strong and a mighty right hand. I've saved you. And if you are obedient to my commands, you will be a kingdom of priests. God is saying that if you obey Him, Christians, if you take him at his word, you will be, as it were, a kingdom of priests to the pagan nations. You will be salt. You will be light to the nations. Children, you obeying your parents has evangelical or evangelistic ramifications. Your friends should see something different. Why do you obey your parents? They're such dorks. They carry their Bibles, and they make you go to church, and they read the Bible at lunch. Why do you what? I don't know, that's what I thought of Christian parents when I was at... because I'm not a Christian for the first 21 years of my life. I honor my parents because God has given me a new heart. God says that those who honor Him, He will honor. You will live long in the new heavens and the new earth. But even in this life, you will have a full and a blessed life. And this will be evangelistic. George Whitefield was once questioned, if you will. It was more of a criticism. He was the preacher who preached thousands and thousands, two thousands and thousands of people. A man came up to me and said, why do you keep preaching that we need to be born again? This is what Whitefield said, children. I keep preaching that you need to be born again because you must be born again. You must be born again. I pray that God Allah, Romans 7, is agitating your heart and you're saying, I can't keep the law. Just like Paul, I'm sure, I can't keep it. Exactly, you can't keep it. That's why Christ came into the world, children. Christ obeyed His earthly parents perfectly. And Christ obeyed His heavenly Father perfectly for miserable wretches like us and like me. And that His righteousness might be given to us if we would repent and believe. You must be born again. You must be. The new birth doesn't merely change what we do. The new birth changes what we want to do. Bumper sticker on Matt's car. The new birth doesn't just change your outside, it changes your inside. And children, if you don't want to obey your parents, perhaps that's a glaring reminder to you that you must be born from above. If you failed, if you as a child or as an adult are saying, I didn't do this. I haven't. I've done the opposite. Remember that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners. The chiefest of sinners. And that sinners like me who blaspheme their parents would provide you with an example. If God can save me as a parent cursor, He can save you too. Children. But your parents, in the Lord for this is right. Honor your father and mother. This is the first commandment with the promise. Verse 3, that it may go well with you. And that you may live long in the land. Children, come and talk to me after. Talk to your parents. Let's do what I think the Lord put on my heart. Some of you are going to take it the wrong way. I actually want us to close our eyes and to think for a moment. Kids, I want you to close your eyes. I want you to think. And I want you to actually ask God to reveal to you your heart. I want you to ask God, am I honoring my parents? Am I dishonoring my parents? God, if I die today and you say that those who curse their parents deserve death, What will happen to me if I stand before you? Close your eyes. Parents, you can close your eyes too. I'm not giving an altar call. I'm not doing that. But sometimes it's profitable for us to just stop and think. God, search me. Try me. See if there'd be any iniquitous way within me. Kids, you might be able to fool your parents, but you know right now with your eyes closed, you can't fool God. He sees, Hebrews 4 says, that He lays naked and exposes us by His Word. Not just what we do, but the very intentions of our hearts. Bible says, look to Jesus Christ and be saved all ye ends of the earth. Trust in the Lord Jesus Christ. Say, forgive me Father. I have sinned against my parents and I have sinned against heaven and you. The Bible says that if you trust in the Lord Jesus Christ, He will forgive you of your sins. If you turn from your sins, He will embrace you and He will give you eternal life. Talk to somebody. Come and talk to me. Who cares if your friends are going to think you're uncool? This is life and death. This is eternal realities. Parents, look at me. Pray for your kids. Pray without ceasing. Pray fervently. Pray, don't worry about what job they get. Don't worry about their friends. Don't worry if they're cool. Pray that God would save your children. That they might go well with them. And they might dwell long in the land. Children, before we partake of the Lord's table, this is for believers. Adults, this is for believers. It's not for churchy people. It's for people who have turned from their sin and asked Christ to forgive them of that sin. They've cast their cares, their loads, their sin on Jesus who has gladly borne it. And we celebrate it. I pray to God one day you will be able to celebrate it with us. That we will partake of this heavenly food as it were. Because God has given us a new heart. If you're not born again, please don't partake of this. If God has given you a new heart, if you can say, I love the Lord Jesus Christ and God's commands are not a burden to me, gladly partake and remind yourself of Christ who died in your place. Father, thank you for the Gospel and how the Gospel is everywhere in your Word. Father, I pray for all of us that we would honor our parents. I pray for the children here that they would obey them in the Lord. So Lord, would you not be pleased to graft them into the righteous root, into the holy stalk? Would it not please you, Lord, to cause them to be born again? As Paul says in Ephesians 2.5, that you might give them life, they might be quickened, that you might raise them up with Christ. Father, we pray, by the power of the Holy Spirit, for all of us, enable us to obey Authority, help us to be transformed into the image of Christ, who obeyed not only his earthly parents well and perfectly, but you. Help us to walk in his steps by the spirit we pray, Father. Bless us this morning as we leave. May this be a pebble in the shoe of some of the children, and would you be pleased to save them, if not today, then this week. Father, we pray this in Jesus' name. Amen.