Turn with me in your Bibles to Proverbs chapter 3 for our sermon text for the evening. As we continue to make our way through the kids' catechism of the Old Testament, Proverbs chapter 3, bringing to a conclusion this extended section, as Solomon continues to give these alternate...alternate...alternate...what's the word? It's been a long day, commands and promises, bringing us to this final command and promise, that command not to be weary because of the love of God. My son, do not despise the Lord's discipline, nor be weary of his reproof. For the Lord reproves him whom he loves as a father, the son in whom he delights. Let us go before the Lord in prayer. Our gracious God and Father, we praise you and thank you for giving us your word. And we pray that even as you bless the reading of the word, we pray even more fully you would bless its preaching. Refresh our hearts, we pray, even in the midst of trial and affliction. We ask in Christ's name, amen. Please be seated. I think it's a common question we often end up asking ourselves, particularly in the times of affliction and trouble. Why do good things, no, I'm sorry, why do bad things happen to good Christians? I think we've all asked it, even if we don't want to admit that we've asked it. I think more poignantly there's that question, why is this happening to me? Could be a particular trial or affliction, be it hardship at work, a strained relationship, disastrous medical prognosis, the death of a loved one. Remember just a few years ago, just all these things seemed to cave in at once, you know, when my dad died and just a few hours later my mom ended up in the hospital for a week and we didn't know what was going on. You know, I was left without a car and a job and just all these things just kind of cave in on you at once and you're left kind of pulling your head going, what in the world is going on? Why is this happening? I'm reminded of a book that came out in the late 70s. I read it about 10, 15 years ago. A wonderful book by a fellow by the name of Sheldon Van Alken. He wrote a book called A Severe Mercy That Tells of His Own Fiery Trial. And it begins by telling the story. Essentially, the first half of the book is a recounting of how he and his would-be wife fell in love. And they fell hard. Both of them were unbelievers. And they loved each other deeply. passionately, and they both end up going to Oxford for college together, fiercely devoted to one another. And Van Alken describes the love that he had for his wife and the love that his wife had for him as a pagan love. They actually gave a word for their love for one another. They called it the great shining barrier, as they vowed to one another that nothing, that no one would stand between the two of them. Well, they go off to college. It turns out that Sheldon's wife, her name was Davy, becomes a believer. Kind of throws a monkey wrench in their intended plans of this great shining barrier, because now there is one that loves her own spouse, or that loves one more than her own spouse. She comes to love the Lord himself even more. And Sheldon describes the great struggle that he had with this. that his own wife would love somebody more than him. Ultimately, he comes to faith. They're both converted. They actually both become close friends with C.S. Lewis, but Fadalka describes this idolatrous love, this great shining barrier, as it continues. Well, then one day, Sheldon's wife dies tragically, and he's left asking, where is God in all of this? Why would God allow such a thing to happen? We're reminded, I think so many of us in the midst of sufferings, we turn to passages like Romans 8, as Paul himself tells us, that God works all things together for our good. But we ought to be reminded that this does not say that all things are good. I think it's the great error that Voltaire made in his novel Candide, as he makes fun of Christians who simply assume that everything itself is good. That's not what Paul's getting at. It's not what the scriptures get at. Rather, we find that we worship a God who is so good that he takes even the greatest evils and subverts them for our good, but even as we're going through the midst of these trials and we confess and cling to the fact that these things are happening for our good in the long run, it is not to say that the things that are happening are in themselves good. Rather, what we confess is that God works even the most painful afflictions in our lives to make us look like his beloved son. So tonight we're going to consider the painful doctrine of discipline. What are we to make of it? How are we to respond? How should we see these trials in light of our adoption into the family of God? I'd like us to consider this under two brief headings. First, we'll consider the matter of discipline. You'll see this here in verse 11. And then secondly, the matter of delight in verse 12. Discipline and delight. I don't think any of us have ever enjoyed being disciplined by our parents. If you did, might I humbly suggest that there is something wrong with you. I remember when I was in the fourth grade getting detention, having to tell my dad as we drove home, it was an hour drive from the small Christian school that I went to in downtown Jacksonville, that hour drive all the way back to Clay Hill. My dad just sitting there in the driving seat going, you're gonna get a whipping when we get home. and just kind of the psychological impact that had on me, thinking as I'm preparing and having to brace for that great act of discipline. I remember us getting home and my dad saying, you know, go to your room, wait five minutes, come into my room, and then you're going to get a spanking for what you've done. I remember my parents had this big cast iron frame bed. It had been over a century old. I think my mom still has it. I remember walking into my dad's room, and here's my dad with a leather belt in his hand, and he's practicing, you know, the belt on the bed frame. And he turns to me and goes, oh, son, come on in. I've just been practicing. I've got a good shoulder today. He has me get on the bed, and he says, well, son, I'm going to tell you, this is going to hurt me a lot worse than it hurts you. And then he stops, and he says, oh, who am I kidding? This is going to hurt you way worse. Of course, he said it with a gleam in his eye, but I, of course, did not see that gleam when I was a fourth grader. My dad was doing this as kind of what we would call psychological warfare to make sure that the discipline does its work. And it did work. I never got spanked ever again. It was horrifying. And yet, in hindsight, I recognize the reason why my father did this. It's the purpose of discipline, to drive folly far from the child. It harkens back to the old world, the old word for discipline that we considered when we first began our study through Proverbs, that word being that of paideia. Sometimes often when we use the word discipline, we think of it in a negative context. But discipline is itself a positive word. For those of you who are a fan of the sports ball, consider the first week of spring training. Practicing for football, you wake up early. You go to practice, and you run till you puke. And then you run some more. You act out of line. What does the coach have you do? Just take a lap. 500 bends and thrusts, what's the purpose? I don't think anybody doing this actually enjoys it, but the purpose is that, of course, correction. It is the training that is required to make you a better man in the arena. Paul himself describes the Christian life as a race that is to be run, a practice that requires all of our discipline and all of our energy, and the practice that is required to run that race, the paideia, that is required. It does not feel good at the time, but that's not the point of discipline. The point of discipline isn't to make you feel good, but that doesn't mean that it's not for your good. It also means that it does not mean that that discipline is itself evil. There is a particular purpose for that. I want you to think of how the Lord himself speaks to Israel. This is kind of a summary of Deuteronomy chapter eight. I encourage you to read it this week, either with yourself or your family. I won't read it in its entirety, but I will read some selections where the Lord tells Israel and describes to them, describes himself as a loving father seeking to discipline his children. Wayward children, children in need of discipline. He says, I led you into the wilderness for 40 years to test your heart so that I could see what was in it. I found pride, unbelief, grumbling, complaining, idolatry. And so I kept you in the wilderness for 40 years to humble you. Still provided for you. Still fed you with manna, your shoes never wore out, your clothes did not deteriorate, gave you fresh water in the desert, cloud to provide shade from the heat, a fiery pillar to provide warmth on those cold nights. But here, the Lord says, I humbled you still. Why? To make you fit and ready for the promised land. To teach you to walk in my ways. And, of course, we find the book of Deuteronomy that here is a whole generation that despised the Lord's discipline, a generation that dies in the wilderness. They grumble, they complain, they refuse to amend their ways, they remain hard-hearted. Well, what Solomon is saying here in this passage as he speaks to his own sons, his son, don't be like them. Do not despise divine discipline. It is painful, that is not to be denied. But that does not mean that it is bad. This is something that is intended for your good. Of course, we can ask why. Why should I embrace these present sorrows for my good? I think sometimes even if you remember as a kid when your parent is disciplining you, maybe they didn't use the switch on you. Maybe they did something else. Maybe they grounded you or some other thing. And even as your mother, your father is telling you, I'm doing this for your good, you almost have this feeling like, I don't believe you. Because it doesn't feel good. How could something that feels so bad actually be so good? How can this work out for my good? Well, here in verse 12, we're given the reason why. It's a great paradox that I think we don't understand until we come to full age, and even as parents begin to see the purpose of discipline, even as we train our own children, it reminds us of God's delight in us. That discipline is, in fact, a mark of God's favor. It doesn't seem like the answer you'd expect. If you're to pose this question, why are all these bad things happening to me? And you say, well, it's because your Heavenly Father loves you. It seems counterintuitive. I remember when I was in college, one of my good buddies had the worst week imaginable. His girlfriend dumped him, he lost his job, he fell off a ladder, fractured his back, ends up in the hospital. And me and my buddy Nick go to visit him in the hospital and say, man, the Lord must really love you. And he didn't know how to respond to that. I think it's important to note how Solomon begins this passage. Look at this, my son. I think what's so striking is that the book of Hebrews, yet again, the greatest commentary in the Old Testament, in my opinion, in so many ways, draws our attention to this. Hebrews chapter 12 reminds us that Solomon is not simply talking to his own son. But he's talking to us all. Solomon's the secondary author, but God is the primary author. And the preacher of Hebrews asks this question to his church, he says, have you not forgotten the exhortation which addresses you as sons? And he quotes this particular passage. So, you know, I think sometimes when we do our Bible studies, we have this kind of intellectual disconnect where we go, ah, here's Solomon addressing his own son. Isn't that nice? No, no, no, no, Hebrews 12 says, this is the Lord addressing you as well. Here are questions that are being posed towards your very heart. Are you chafing under God's disciplinary rod? We find this passage, Proverbs is written for all believers. When you read, my son, here in Proverbs, you should be thinking that your heavenly Father is speaking to you. Josh, do not despise the Lord's instruction. Elijah, do not grow weary when your heavenly father reprimands you. Tim, because your God chastens the one whom he loves. Jesse, just as your father delights in you. I'm not calling out you guys individually as if something is going on, but to remind you, this is exactly, the Lord is addressing you. The Lord is addressing me. And yet, I want us to consider, as painful as this might be in those times of hardship, what the frightful alternative would be. I remember, again, growing up, being reminded that my father and mother disciplined me, and they treated it seriously. What I thought was striking is my parents never disciplined any of my friends. I remember when I was 12, my dad took me on a fishing trip with a couple of my buddies, and we all did some stupid stuff, and my friends didn't get in trouble, but I sure did. Kids, you might think that it's upsetting that your parents are sending you to your room or grounding you, and you go, well, you're not doing this to any of my friends. Well, your parents aren't doing this to anybody else walking down the street either. And yet what it is is it's something that reflects a very special bond between the parent and the child. You see, if discipline is a mark of God's love for his children, then the fact that you're being disciplined should remind you that God is your heavenly father. The frightful alternative would be if God did not discipline you. The frightful implication would be that you would not be his child. Think of what, again, the author of Hebrews 12 says as he considers this passage is, if you are without chastisement, of which we are all partakers, so the author of Hebrews is not just simply wagging the finger at everyone else but himself. He says, no, this is something that's true of all of us. He says, if you are without chastisement, of which we are all believers, then you are illegitimate and you are not sons. You know, we speak of all the benefits that come from our union with Christ, justification, adoption, sanctification, peace of conscience, peace with God, all those other benefits that flow from and attend our union with Christ. And I think what we should think about when we think of all those other benefits that flow from and attend our union with Christ, discipline being one of them. Because it is a mark of your adoption as sons. If God does not deal with you as sons, then it is proof that you are illegitimate. The KJV has some very strong words here for those who are illegitimate. It's one without any legal standing, one without any right in the family of God. Let me ask you this, which is worse, to be disciplined now, painful though it might be for a time, or to be allowed to go and do whatever you want only to be handed over to God's fiery wrath on the day of judgment. That is the great judgment of Romans chapter one. Romans 118 to 31, three times it is said that the nations have exchanged the truth of God for a lie. They have worshiped the creature instead of the creator. They have exchanged natural affections for those vile affections, and what does God do? It's not that you want that. All right, have at it. He hands them over to their affections. He does not discipline them. He does not chastise them. He lets them continue to do what they want. For them, it might sound great in the short run. I'm able to live however I please. but it demonstrates the reality that they do not belong to God and on the last day they will bear that punishment for all eternity as they stand before God, not as a loving father, but as they stand before him as the judge and maker of heaven and earth. The Lord says you wouldn't have it, but know this, there will be a final reckoning and on that day there will be no mercy. This is exactly what Paul tells the church of Corinth in his first letter to them is that we as the church, we as the people of God are disciplined so that we may not be condemned along with the world. I think our point here, it's a very simple point, but one that we have to stop and reflect. Our adoption into God's family recasts the problem of evil in a different light, doesn't it? You see, for the Christian, suffering is not a mark of God's absence, but is a picture of his loving presence. Affliction is no proof against the existence of God. Rather, it is a startling reminder that he is there, and he is not silent. And he will not leave you in your sin. That's what D.A. Carson calls the dangerous doctrine of the love of God, is that God is more concerned about your growth in grace than you are often concerned about your growth in grace. We have a Savior who's more concerned that I grow in godliness than I am concerned about growing in godliness. You know what happens when I'm not as concerned about growing in godliness? The Lord disciplines me. Why? Because He loves me. So much better than the alternative The Lord would just hand me over and let me do whatever I wanted. Here's a basic principle in life. The Lord thrusts us into trials to test our hearts, but He does not abandon us to our own devices. Rather, he uses all these things together for our good, to prune us, to purge us, to purify us, that we might grow in godliness. Perhaps a phrase that you've heard from a preacher before, God's concern is not our happiness, small h, as much as it is our holiness. Of course, our chief happiness, our chief end, is the glory and enjoyment of God. But the point here is suffering does not feel like a trip to a theme park. And you know what, that's okay, because that's not what discipline is for. Discipline is for something far greater. It is to work character in us, to conform us to the image of Christ. I don't want you to misunderstand me. I'm not saying that everything that befalls us is a direct consequence of our own actions. You know, I don't want you to go home thinking, well, you're reflecting on your life. I remember this one point in time that as a kid, I had a puppy that was mauled by a bear. Therefore, I must have done something wrong to deserve it. That's not what I'm getting at here. But my point is this, that the Lord has tailor made for each of us a cross. to make us look like Christ. Our father has tailor-made a cross for each of his children. He knows our frailties, he knows our weakness, he knows our pride. He knows our sin and our folly. He knows where our self-righteousness festers far better than we do, and so he disciplines us in his infinite wisdom in such a way to make us look like his son. And that discipline will look like crucifixion. It's what Christ himself says. If any man desires to be my disciple, he must deny himself, take up his cross daily, and follow me. But our heavenly father does this to make us look like Christ. He does this to make us fit for the promised land. He does this to make us fit for heaven. Christian discipline is parental. And again, I don't want us to see that word discipline in a purely negative light. It is a paideia. It is a exercise. It is spring training. It is boot camp. There's an old Puritan who said that there is no heaven without a cross. As Paul writes to the Church of Rome, we must suffer with him. in order to be glorified with him. Such is the path to glory. This discipline is something that all God's children undergo. And Hebrews tells the church, though you may be wearied by such discipline, you have great need for endurance. just as spring training, just as running those laps, just as the various athletic exercises that are required. It is a training in righteousness, not simply to keep you from doing the bad, but also to promote and instill you a love for doing the good. It's what the risen Lord Jesus Christ told the lazy church of Laodicea, those whom I love, I reprove and discipline, so be zealous and repent. Or Job, happy is the man whom the Lord reproves, who turns from his ways and pursues holiness. Charles Bridges in his commentary on this passage writes this, No communion is so close, no communion is so endearing, no communion is so fruitful as with a chastening God. These are severe mercies, and yet it is a mercy that is for our good. So do not grow weary in the midst of discipline. Let us pray. Our gracious God and Heavenly Father, we thank you that you do discipline us. but that you do not come to us in wrath. You know each of our frames, you know when we need a gentle firmness, and you know when we need a firm gentleness. We pray that you would not break us in your discipline, but that in your loving care you would bind up and mend those things that have been bruised. And that if our pride is such that we must be dashed against the rocks to be saved, we ask that you would do so only to make us look more and more like your son. that we might be healed, that you might be blessed and praised. We ask these things in Christ's name, amen.