Philippians chapter 2. Tonight's message is a little more of a topical message, if you will, so we'll be, I'll be reading off quite a few verses, and if you're a note-taker, get ready to take some notes. So we'll go to Philippians chapter 2, and we'll start there in verse 1, if you don't mind standing when you find that. The title of the message this evening is called, Leave Space for Grace. Leave Space for Grace. Philippians 2, verse 1, the Bible says, If there be therefore any consolation in Christ, If any comfort of love, if any fellowship of the spirit, if any bowels and mercies, fulfill ye my joy that ye be like-minded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind. Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory, but in lowliness of mind. Let each esteem each other better than themselves. Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others. Let this mind be in you, which also in Christ Jesus. Let's pray, Lord. We thank you. We love you. Again, thank you for just allowing us to be here in your house to worship you and lift up your name, Lord. And I just pray that, again, you empty me of myself and fill me with your spirit. Lord, we love you and we thank you. In your precious name, Jesus, we pray. Amen. You may be seated. So the title is Leave Space for Grace. Now I have, I'm sorry teenagers, I have taught this before to you all a few months back. But I changed it up a little bit. I did change it and add some things. But I believe it's something that we can all use, not just for teenagers. I have here three keys, if you want to write this down, three keys to interpersonal relationships. I don't know if you all remember this, teenagers, but I had you write something down. And I said, on a piece of paper, and I know it sounds kind of morbid, I'm sorry, but I said, write your name and put your birth date. And then in seven days, I want you to put a date. Say, what if you had seven days to live? I know it's not always fun to think about, but what if you had seven days to live? You know, we would probably start thinking about things a little bit differently in our life. We would probably start spending a little bit more time with our loved ones. We would probably not be thinking about many things that we think about today. If we had any grudges with anybody or any shortcomings with somebody else or just things we have going in our lives, things become really just not important in the grand scheme of things when you know the time is short. We know the Bible says, life is but a vapor. So I want to look today at three keys to interpersonal relationships. So again, if you're a note taker, get ready to take some notes. Number one, the first key is forgiveness. Colossians 3.13 says, forbearing one another and forgiving one another, if any man have quarrel against any, even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye. That word forbearing there means, in Greek, it means to put up with. Who would say here, I can say it, Christ puts up with me. We probably have people, maybe family members, I don't know, that we have to put up with. That's part of life. Sometimes we put up with each other. You know, forgiveness is a foundation of relationships. Or it's one of the big foundations of relationships. Because the truth is, if you're in an interpersonal relationship, you're going to hurt someone's feelings. And someone's going to hurt your feelings. So every interpersonal relationship you're in, there's one guarantee is that someone is going to hurt your feelings. I mean, I've hurt my wife's feelings, I don't want to say how many times. But I'm sure I've hurt her feelings more than I should have. She's maybe hurt my feelings a couple of times as well. But you can't be part of a close relationship, I don't believe, without getting hurt in some way. Everybody hurts somebody. But 2,000 years ago, Jesus died for my sinful thoughts, for my sinful words, my sinful actions. There's so many things that I have done in life that really I look back on and I'm like, wow, Christ forgave me for that. I mean, if Christ can forgive me for all of those things, I think that I can forgive people for anything they've done to me. You know, if Jesus can forgive Gabe Stevens of all of his sins, I think I can forgive other people. I think all of us can really, if we really grasped onto that thought, Life would be better. Our interpersonal relationships, I believe, would be that much better. Ephesians 4 32 says, and be kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God, for Christ's sake, hath forgiven you. So I wrote this down. This is the best definition of forgiveness that I have heard. It is this, having the compassion to release someone of their debt and no longer being the judge. having the compassion to release someone of their debt, and no longer being the judge. Because when we don't forgive, we want to be the judge. When we hold grudges and say, I'm not going to forgive that person, in essence, we're giving out the sentence. We're sentencing someone else. I'm going to sentence you to maybe a personal vendetta. Or I'm going to sentence you to the silence treatment. Have any husbands or wives been to the silence treatment? Actually, don't tell me that. But I'm going to sentence you to gossip. I'm going to make your life miserable. You know, we sentence people to things, but say, you know what? We need to release that and let God be the judge. In James 4, 12, it says, there is one lawgiver who is able to save and to destroy. Who art thou that judgest another? And again, in Isaiah 33, verse 22, for the Lord is our judge. The Lord is our lawgiver. The Lord is our king. He will save us. So let's let Jesus be the king. So forgiveness is a choice of your will. It's an act and a process. You know, when we're deeply hurt, sometimes it can be a process. You know, we don't just forget it right away. A lot of times it can pop back in our head. You know, we forgive somebody, but let's just be real. Sometimes it pops back up, right? We think about it. You know, we put the cassette tape in and rewind it. Do you all know what a cassette tape is? OK. Or maybe you just push restart. But we play these things over and over and ahead sometimes, and it's a process sometimes to forgive people. It is. It's a process. But the truth is we can't forget it. I don't think it's possible. We can't truly forget it. If you can, tell me how. But what I have learned is what not to say in an apology. Are you all ready for this? what not to say when you hurt somebody. Don't say, I am sorry if I hurt you. I'm sorry if I hurt you. No, no, no. Be specific. Say, you know what? I'm sorry that I did this to you and hurt your feelings in this way. Because when we say, I'm sorry if I hurt you, what we're doing, we're putting it on that person. Say, well, it's really your problem that your feelings are hurt. So let's be specific about it. Matthew 5.23 and 24 says, therefore, if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and thou rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee, leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way. First be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift. So the first key, that's key number one. First key was forgiveness. The second key, if you want to write this down, is understanding. To get eyes off of self and try to comprehend what is going on in someone else's life. Philippians 2.4, we just read this, look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others. So there's three truths in understanding others. There's number one. This one is really groundbreaking. They are not you. They are not you. We have different genders, different personalities. We have different upbringings. My wife and I, we are completely different. She is an extrovert. She gets all of her energy from being around people. I'm an introvert. I could just be home and sit in the corner all day. We're different. We're different people. So she is not me, and I am not her. We have to recognize that people are different than us. At times, we might be upset at people because they don't act the way that maybe we think they should act, or they don't have the convictions maybe that we have. So it's just important to realize that everybody's different. The second truth in understanding people is this, they are the church. They are the church. They are not you, but they are the church. Let's go ahead and turn our Bibles over to Acts chapter nine real quick. Turn over to Acts chapter nine. When you get there, say amen. Acts chapter 9, let's look at verse 1. The Bible says, And Saul, yet breathing out threatenings and slaughter against the disciples of the Lord, went unto the high priest, and desired of him letters to Damascus, to the synagogues, that if he found any this way, whether they were men or women, he might bring them bound unto Jerusalem. And as he journeyed, he came near Damascus, and suddenly there shined round about him a light from heaven. And he fell to the earth and heard a voice saying unto him, Saul, Saul, why persecutest thou me? And he said, who art thou, Lord? And the Lord said, I am Jesus, whom thou persecutest. It is hard for thee to kick against the pricks. So if you look there at verses one through three, here is Paul, he's persecuting Christians, right? But in verse four and five, who does Jesus say he is persecuting? He's persecuting Christ. You know, when we have ill will or persecute our brothers and sisters in Christ, we're persecuting the church. And we're persecuting Jesus because Christ died for the church. If you hurt the church, you are attacking the Lord. So the third truth in understanding others, I think this is a big one too, is they are not finished yet. We're all still growing, right? We're all still growing spiritually, and we're all at different levels spiritually, and we have different convictions, and I'm still growing, and I'm still thankful for second chances. You know, I mess up so many times, but I'm still growing spiritually, and I'm still trying to be a better husband. I'm still trying to be a better father. I'm still trying to have a better walk with the Lord, and I mess up so much. I can't sit up here and act like I have it all figured out, because I don't. If you do, please let me know. You know, we're all still growing spiritually. We're all at different stages of our lives, and I think it's so important to remember that. that we don't want to, we sometimes want people to be in a certain place in their life that they're not, and we don't show that grace. We need to have more space for grace, more space for grace in people when they're not doing things that we really want them to do. We lose patience, and that's not fair, because Christ is so patient with us. He forbears us. He puts up with us. So they are not you. They are the church, and remember, they are not finished yet. They're not finished yet. So the third key to interpersonal relationships is needs, right? See others' needs and meet them. We all have needs. Everyone in here has needs. You teens remember this? Look to your right. Everyone look to your right. That person has needs. Look to your left. That person has needs. Look in front of you. Not you all. Just kidding. We all, just kidding, we all have needs. You know, we can get our eyes off of ourselves, and you know what, see how we can help someone else. How can we meet the needs of somebody else? When we're focused on other people's needs, our relationships become stronger and better, and we don't get so easily offended at the small things, when we're not so focused on our wants, our desires, our needs. But hey, what can I do for my friend over here? What can I do for this person over here? People have needs. Matthew 7, 12, the golden rule. Therefore, all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them, for this is the law and the prophets. So I have a challenge for you. You didn't know you were going to get homework, did you? Maybe there's someone that you struggle getting along with. Maybe there's someone that you have to forbear. I want to encourage you to start praying for that person. Start seeing, how can I help that person with any needs they may have? Maybe it's a prayer. Maybe it's an encouraging word. Maybe it's financial. I have needs, but no, I'm just kidding. Maybe it's a co-worker. Maybe it's a family member. You know, relationships are hard, but let's see how we can meet other people's needs, how we can encourage other people. Like I said, maybe it's just praying with them. Like, hey, you know what, can I pray with you? You know, people need prayer. A lot of times, you know, a lot of times people act out or act a certain way because really it's just a cry for help. It's a cry for help. So we can so easily brush someone off because they're acting up and it's, hey, it's easy to do. But sometimes that person just needs that encouraging word to, hey, keep going. You can do it. Don't worry about it. I forgive you. Can I pray for you? How do we help those people in needs? It helps you grow spiritually and it creates a bond with others. Every relationship has needs, marriages, homes, friends, and church. The devil wants to destroy church so bad. He wants to destroy families so bad. The devil would love nothing more for all of us in here to have something against each other, to have friction against each other. He wants to prevent the church from going forward. But let's not let that happen. I mean, Jesus already won. Let's focus on Jesus, because he's already won. Let's not let the devil win. 1 John 4, 11-12 says, Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought also to love one another. No man hath seen God at any time. If we love one another, God dwelleth in us, and his love is perfected in us. You know, when your relationship with God is what it needs to be, all other relationships you have will be so much better. When we're walking with the Lord and really walking in the steps that he has us to be, relationships become easier. Because we don't get so offended at certain things. We don't get so maybe bitter or anxious or irritable. You know, when you fly on the airplanes, you see the stewardesses going over all the safety checks and everything. And what do they say about the oxygen mask? I probably wasn't paying attention. I usually don't when I go through those safety things. But what do they say first? When the oxygen mask comes down, they say, help yourself first before you can help anybody else. Because what happens if you don't? You're useless. You'll die. You won't be able to help that person. When we don't place God first in our lives, it can be confusing, frustrating, overwhelming. You know, let's put on the oxygen mask so we can help other people. Now, what is the oxygen mask? The Word of God. If we get into the Word of God and get a really good prayer life and start walking with the Lord, it's amazing how things start to work out. It's amazing how relationships start to get easier. Because we realize it's not about me. It's not about me. It's about others. It's about Jesus. It's about how do I shine the way Jesus wants me to shine. So let's put on the oxygen mask, if you will. Isaiah 40 verse 30 and 31 says, even the youth shall faint and be weary, and the young men shall utterly fall, but they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength. They shall mount up with wings as eagles, they shall run and not be weary, and they shall walk and not faint. You know, whenever I'm becoming, feeling blah, or when I feel irritable, or things aren't really going well with me, most of the time, I'm calling myself out, most of the time it's because I'm not reading God's word the way I should be. I'm not meditating on his word the way I should be. I'm not praying the way I should be. When we're not close to God, our relationships will struggle. When we're not walking the way we're supposed to walk, we don't see things as clearly. But what does James 4.8 say? Draw nigh to God, and what? He will draw nigh to who? To you, that's right. So relationships are successful when we lose our pride and when we have a humble spirit. James 4, 6 says, but he giveth more grace, wherefore he saith, God resisteth the proud, but giveth grace unto the humble. We need grace. God gives grace. Jesus leaves space for grace. Again, I'm so thankful for the grace that Jesus has bestowed upon me. I'm sure you all are too. I need it. I need his grace. But why don't we start showing other people that grace? Let's leave space for grace in our relationships. Hebrews 4.16 says, let us therefore come boldly under the throne of grace that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need. I love that song. It says, grace, grace, God's grace, grace that will pardon and cleanse within, grace, grace, God's grace, grace that is greater than all our sin. Who in here is thankful for God's grace? Let's not forget that. Let's not become numb to what He has done for us. If we're not careful as Christians, and again, I'm preaching to myself, I'm talking to myself, but if we're not careful, we can go through the motions, and we can hear the John 3 16s, and we can hear the verses, and it's like, yeah, yeah, I've heard that verse before, I've heard that verse before, but let's not get numb to the things of the Lord. Let's get a close walk with the Lord. Let's leave space for grace in our relationships. So there's three keys to interpersonal relationships. I'm sure the teenagers will probably remember this. Forgiveness, understanding, and needs. What's the acronym for that? Fun, right? Relationships can be fun. It's a lot more fun, I was gonna say funner, it's a lot more fun when we have a close walk with the Lord and that gives us a closer walk with our brothers and sisters in Christ. Life is too short. Life is a vapor. Let us not be bitter against one another. Let's lose those grudges. And let's not be the judge. Let's not sentence people to vendettas. Let's not sentence people to the silent treatment. Let's not sentence people to what we think they should be sentenced to. Let's let God be the judge. Let's show them that grace that we can. Life is but a vapor. It's not worth it. Colossians 4 and 5, 4, 5 through 6, It says, walk in wisdom toward them that are without, redeeming the time. Let your speech be always with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man. So let's redeem the time. Let's leave space for grace. Let's pray. Lord, we just again come to you and we thank you for your goodness and your love. Lord, we're thankful for your grace. You are so good to us. Lord, we don't deserve it. We're thankful that you died on that cross so that we could be with you someday. Lord, just forgive us for our sins and help us to come together, and I believe we already do as a church, and continue to love each other and just to encourage each other and to lift your name up, Lord, so that we may grow the church for your glory and your honor. The piano is playing if you want to stand. Is there anything that relationships, maybe somebody you need to forgive, maybe somebody that you need to ask forgiveness for, maybe you need to go to the Lord and just bring something else to Him. It doesn't have to be related to this message at all. Well, we'll open up the altar right now if you want to come forward and just do business with the Father. you All right, well, thank you for coming out this evening. Pray you got something from God's word tonight. So be safe out there as you drive home. And Mackie, if you don't mind praying for us.