We're turning to Deuteronomy chapter 7. Deuteronomy chapter 7. We'll read from the opening verse, off the word. We'll read and then we'll stand for prayer. Deuteronomy chapter 7 and the verse number 1. God is instructing His people here. It says, When the Lord thy God shall bring thee into the land, whither thou goest to possess it, and hath cast out many nations before thee, the Hittites, and the Girgashites, and the Amorites, and the Canaanites, and the Perizzites, and the Hivites, and the Jebusites, seven nations greater and mightier than now. When the Lord thy God shall deliver them before thee, thou shalt smite them and utterly destroy them. Thou shalt make no covenant with them, nor show mercy unto them. Neither shalt thou make marriages with them. Thy daughter thou shalt not give unto his son, nor his daughter shalt thou take unto thy son, for they will turn away thy son from following me. that they may serve other gods. So will the anger of the Lord be kindled against you and destroy thee suddenly. But thus shall ye deal with them. Ye shall destroy their altars and break down their images and cut down their groves and burn their graven images with fire. For thou art an holy people unto the Lord thy God. The Lord thy God hath chosen thee to be a special people unto himself above all people. that are upon the face of the earth. The Lord did not set his love upon you, nor choose you, because you were more in number than any people, for you were the fewest of all people. But because the Lord loved you, and because he would keep the oath which he had sworn unto your fathers, hath the Lord brought you out with a mighty hand, and redeemed you out of the house of bondmen, from the hand of Pharaoh, king of Egypt. Know therefore that the Lord thy God, he is God, the faithful God, which keepeth covenant and mercy with them that love him, and keepeth commandments to a thousand generations, and repayeth them that hate him to their face, to destroy them, he will not be slack to them that hateth him, he will repay him to his face. I shall therefore keep the commandments and the statutes and the judgments which I command thee this day, to do then. Amen. And we'll end our reading at the end of the verse 11. Let's please stand briefly for a word of prayer, if you can. If you're able to stand then, please stand for prayer. Loving Father, we now come to the ministry of thy word. We thank thee for the word of God. We pray that thou wilt help us to preach the word. Help me, Lord, fill me with thy spirit. Leave me not to myself. Give great help in the ministry. off the word, and may we be instructed with regard to these matters that we have been considering in recent weeks. O God, guide all in these things, we pray, and may our hearts be instructed from out of thy word even today. Lord, come and fill me with thy Spirit. Help me to preach the word, for I pray these prayers in and through the Savior's holy and precious and worthy name. Amen and amen. You may be seated. Over the last few weeks, we have been considering together the important subject matter of biblical marriages, biblical marriage. In previous messages, we have thought about the primacy of marriage. We thought about the purpose of marriage, the price of marriage. Last Lord's Day, we thought about the perverting of marriage, the products of marriage, the permanence of marriage, and the pleasure in and of marriage. Well today I want to conclude this little series of message in a message that I've entitled Preparing for Marriage. Preparing for Marriage. Marriage is certainly not the Marriage is certainly not something that you want to walk or sleepwalk into. Marriage is not something that you simply want to drift into. As it were, it's just the initial or the next progressive step with regard to your relationship with another individual. There must be serious forethought given to the step that you're about to take. and what marriage actually involves. There must be a weighing up of the responsibilities and of the roles that you are to assume as a husband or as a wife. There is to be a questioning as to whether or not you are ready, whether or not you are ready for the serious task that is before you in setting up a home and becoming a husband to a wife or a wife to a husband. Of all things in life, marriage surely is one that should never be drifted into. On the part of both parties, there must be prayerful consideration before entering into the marriage covenant. To get it wrong in this, is to invite all kinds of trouble and heartache and disappointment into your life and into your home. I cannot but emphasize this enough Marriage should not be entered into unadvisedly or lightly, but it should be entered into reverently, discreetly, in the fear of God, and after much serious thought. Bishop J.C. Ryle wrote a great book for young men. It's entitled, Thoughts for Young Men. And in that book, he gave this advice concerning marriage. He said, who can estimate the importance of a right choice in marriage? It is a step which, according to the old saying, either makes a man or ruins him. He went on to say, your happiness in both lives may depend on it. Your wife must either help your soul or harm it. She will either flame the flame of Christianity in your heart or throw cold water upon it and make it burn low. She will either be wings or handcuffs, an encouragement or an hindrance to your Christianity according to her character. I'm stating the obvious, I know when I say this, but choosing a marriage partner is obviously an important component in preparing for marriage. If you don't have someone to marry, well then you can't marry. You can't marry yourself, although I think actually people now can marry themselves. which is again another perversion of biblical marriage. But there needs to be a marriage partner if you are to then enter into a marriage union. And I trust that what I will show you today, very simply from the Word of God, will direct those who are seeking such a person in their lives. Maybe not today, maybe not next year, but sometime in your life. Coming to that point where you are going to decide who you are to marry. I trust that what I will say will be helpful to those who are looking for that someone to marry. The first matter that I want to speak about is who you should not marry. Who you should not marry. Who you shouldn't marry. As a Christian, as a believer, As one of the redeemed of the Lord, the pool of potential marriage partners is restricted by God. It is restricted by God. The pool of marriage partners is restricted by God. And it is restricted for good and beneficial reasons. Whereas the ungodly they take to themselves to marry whom they will, those who savingly know Christ are forbidden to marry an unbeliever. I believe that such is taught in Scripture in two ways. It is taught by way of exhortation, and it is also taught by way of example. I want us to consider, first of all, then, these exhortations that argue for a believer not to marry an unbeliever. Deuteronomy chapter 7, the verses 1 to 3. In that passage that we read today, God gives and sets down a principle regarding His covenant people Israel, regarding the various nations that lived in Canaan when they came to dispossess Him from the promised land, Israel was forbidden to do three things with those people groups when they came to possess the promised land. If you note the verses there, you'll find in the verse number 2 that they were to make no covenant with them. That was the first thing they were not to do. The second thing was that they were to show them no mercy, to extend no mercy to these individuals. And thirdly, they were not to make marriages with them. And then God, gives the reason why. You see, God is a good father. He doesn't, as it were, set down a stipulation and then not explain the reason why. What a lesson that is for all Christian parents. We can stipulate certain things that our children should not do. We believe them to be right. We have convictions about them. We see such taught in Scripture. But we should then bring our children to the Word of God and explain to them the biblical reasons why they should not do and why they should not go to certain places and why they should not participate in certain activities. Now, speaking to his children here, his covenant children, he then gives the reason why they were not to make marriages with the ungodly, with these heathen, with these pagan individuals in the promised land. Verse number 4, There's the reason. They'll turn away my son from following me. Ah, but will my marriage to them not cause them to become a Christian, to become a follower of Jehovah? That's the reasoning that some people give when they enter into a marriage union with an unconverted person. They themselves being believers, but surely my faith in Jesus Christ will bring them to a saving knowledge of their sins forgiven. But God, He stipulates very clearly, that it seems to be that the probable outcome, the most likeliest of outcomes of such a union is that the individual, the ungodly, will turn the heart of the true follower of Jehovah away from following God. That is what God has placed here. I believe that what is a principle here For God's covenant people Israel, I believe that this principle can be carried through and is proper and right for God's covenant people today. We are of Abraham's seed. We are his spiritual seed. We belong to the household of faith. We belong to the same household as Abraham belonged to. We're justified as he was justified by faith alone in Christ alone. And what was proper? This principle set down here in Deuteronomy, I believe is a principle that can be carried through even into the lives of God's believing people today. I believe that a believer should not marry an unbeliever. 2 Corinthians is the second portion we want to turn to. 2 Corinthians, in the chapter 6, these words are familiar to us all. 2 Corinthians, chapter 6. And the verse number 14 and 15, Now the language that Paul uses here in 2 Corinthians 6 comes from a practice in agriculture that predated the mechanization of farming. The farmer would have joined together with a large wooden beam called a yoke, two animals of the same kind to either pull a plough or to pull a cart. To join together two animals of different natures would have been a recipe for disaster. To put an ox and a horse together It would have been a recipe for disaster. They needed to be of the same nature in order to fulfill the task that was placed upon them by that particular farmer. And such is the case when it comes to a yoking together in many areas of life. In many areas of life. But I believe that this can also be applied to marriage. And many commentators, many Bible commentators suggest that this admonition not to be unequally yoked together with unbelievers can be applied to marriage. Because what closer union is there? What closer bond is there, yoking together is there, than whenever a man and a woman come together and joined together in holy matrimony. There are only two families in this world. There is God's family and there is Satan's family. Christ would say to the religious leaders, you're off your father, the devil. And so there is a family in this world, Satan's family. There is the family of God, God's family. And I want to say as a pastor and as a minister to all young people here today and those who are maybe older and you're seeking someone to marry, you don't want to marry into the wrong family. You don't want to marry into the wrong family. I remember someone once said that if you as a believer marry an unbeliever, you're going to have trouble with your father-in-law all your life. I speak of your spiritual father-in-law. If you as a believer marry an unbeliever, you're going to have problems and you're going to have trouble with your father-in-law all your life. Brethren and sisters, a consideration of the words of the Lord to Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden should be enough for you to run the opposite way. If approached by an unbeliever to form a relationship with them, What did God say to Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden after sin's entrance? He said this, God said that there would be enmity, that there would be hostility between the seed of Satan and the seed of Christ. And that enmity has not ceased. That enmity still exists today. And so in light of that verse, and in light of that promise there in Genesis 3 verse 15, what then makes a person think that living with a child of the devil is in any way going to be harmonious? If there's going to be enmity between the seed of Christ and the seed of Satan, how is it ever going to be harmonious in such a marriage? You would be self-deluded. into thinking that peace is going to ensue if such a union is formed. To marry a non-Christian is to marry a child of the devil. It is to marry an enemy of Christ. It is to join one whose spiritual appetite is the complete opposite of your own. It is dangerous. But before I proceed, let me just say a word to those who maybe are married to an unsafe spouse. You know, God gives counsel to such people there in 1 Peter chapter 3, what they ought to do with regard to being in a marriage. where there is a married, saved, and unsaved person together, maybe a backslidden husband or wife. Let me read those verses, 1 Peter 3, verse 1 and 2. Likewise ye wise be in subjection to your own husbands, that if any obey not the word. And so this is an unbeliever here, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives. They behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. Peter says here by your chaste or by your pure way of living that a saved wife can win her unbelieving spouse to Christ. They are not to seek removal from such a one, but rather they are to live out the gospel. They are continue to live before them. They are to continue to love them and to submit to them as a faithful wife. And so you are encouraged to continue to live with such an individual. 1 Corinthians 7 verses 12 through to 14 brings that also to our attention. Maybe I should read those verses. 1 Corinthians 7 verse 12 to 14, but to the rest speak I, The Lord, if any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away. And the woman which hath a husband that believeth not, if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband. Elsewhere were your children unclean, but now are they holy. But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother and sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God hath called us to peace. And so Paul gives instruction here. The unbelieving wife is to remain with the unbelieving husband, if it so pleases him. Continues to live out the gospel and loves him for Christ. Through their living and through their godly example, then through prayer, God himself can move in marvelous ways and bring that dear one to the Lord Jesus Christ. And then we think of those words in Amos chapter 3. I wonder have you ever taken part in a three-legged race? I'm sure you have. The key to success in such a race is that you walk in the same direction and you also walk at the same pace. That's the key to success in a three-legged race, walk in the same direction and walk in at the same pace as the other person that you are bound to, that you're tied to. Well, in Amos 3, verse 3, God asks a question. Can two walk together except they be agreed? The obvious answer is no. Of course they cannot. In order for two people to walk together in agreement, they must be headed in the same direction, and they must be headed at the same pace as the other, just as the participants in a three-legged race. Well, a Christian is a person that is out of step with the world. A Christian is a person who is out of step with the world. And therefore, a believer can never be in step with an unbeliever. It cannot be possible. If the Christian is out of step with the world, how then can he be in step with an unbeliever, a child of the world? In spiritual terms, both must be headed in the same direction. But in spiritual terms, a believer is headed in one direction, an unbeliever is headed in another direction. The believer towards God and towards righteousness, the unbeliever away from God and towards unrighteousness, and thus to marry a person whose spiritual state is completely different from your own will mean that you will be out of step with them for the rest of your life unless God intervenes and God saves them. This will lead to tension in the marriage if you do not walk together in harmony. If you do not walk together as one. This will lead to tension, conflict, and there are many areas in which that will materialize with regard to finances. Well, you as a child of God, you will see the responsibility of tithing and of bringing in the offering to the work of God. And you will want to help those who are involved in missionary work. But the unbeliever, They will want to modernize the home, buy a better car. Their mindset is a worldly mindset. Your mindset is a spiritual mindset. And so there's going to be a conflict with regard to finances. There's going to be a conflict with regard to your social activities, where you go, what you partake of whenever you go out and socialize, with regard to your friendships and who they are formed with. But no area more so will this tension arise when it comes to how to raise children. How they're going to be disciplined. How they're going to be disciplined. Well, you're going to follow the rule of Scripture. You're not going to spare the rod. You're going to chasten the child in their disobedience. And so with regard to the disciplining of children, what church to affiliate with? Well, as a believer, obviously you would want to affiliate with an evangelical church, a gospel preaching church, but an unsaved person, well, even if they even want their children to affiliate with a church or the family. And so that will become a matter of conflict and tension. What events your children are allowed to attend when they grew up, Well, as a Christian, you'll not want them to attend the things of the world, but as an unbeliever, if you marry an unbeliever, they'll be quite happy to send them out to the disco and to the nightclub. What about the morals that they live by? It's all going to be determined by the spiritual composition of a marriage. And if the marriage is divided, and if the husband and wife are not walking together in agreement, then it is going to be difficult to get agreement on these particular matters, and many other matters. So the counsel is very simple. Choose a marriage partner who is in step with God. And they are walking with God. And then you as a believer will then be in step with them as you walk with God. Now the Bible not only argues that a believer should not marry an unbeliever by way of exhortation, but also by way of example. You only have to read the inspired histories of men like Samson and Solomon to see what followed their unholy alliances in wedlock. You only have to read their accounts. Samson, Samson upon whom the Spirit of God came, and yet his marriages with questionable women. culminating in his relationship with Delilah. Oh, the end of that man, Samson. What he could have been, what he could have been, if he hadn't married a godly girl. But his history is there for us all to see. And Solomon, the one who wrote that most tender of love songs, the song of Solomon, But yet at the end of life, what does he write? Ecclesiastes, where he will say, vanity, vanity, all is vanity. Read their accounts. And let those accounts warn you about entering into a marriage with an unbeliever. But let's turn to the book of Nehemiah. I want to read a number of verses here. Nehemiah chapter 13. You'll just find Nehemiah after the book of Ezra, just before the book of Esther. And so Nehemiah chapter 13. You know, Nehemiah, he actually uses the example of Solomon. to warn the people of his day with regard to the mixed marriages that were taking place between the covenant people of Israel and the ungodly. Let me read from the verse 23 here, Nehemiah 13 verse 23. In those days also I saw Jews that had married wives of Ashdod, of Ammon, and of Moab, And their children spake half the speech of Ashdod, and could not speak in the Jews' language, but according to the language of each people." There we have a marriage and the consequence, the by-product of such a marriage. Here are children and they're speaking like the world. It goes on to say in verse 25, And I contended with them, and cursed them, and smote certain of them, and plucked off They heard and made them swear by God, saying, Did not Solomon the king of Israel sin by these things? Yet among many nations was there no king like him, who was beloved of his God, and God made him king over Israel. Nevertheless, Oh, what a sad nevertheless. Nevertheless, even him did a outlandish woman cause to sin. Shall we then hearken unto you to do all this great evil, to transgress against our God in marrying strange wives? Solomon, he's beloved of God. This is how Nehemiah speaks of him. He's a believer. He speaks of him as being beloved of God. Verse 26, who was beloved of his God, and yet it was his wives that caused him to sin. Outlandish woman caused him to sin. The danger of marrying. A person who is a slave and a servant of sin is so great. It's so great. Various Reformed confessions, they speak about the kinds of people a believer should not marry. The 1689 London Baptist Confession is one. You can research that for yourself. But let me quote from our own Confession of Faith, the Westminster Confession, of which all ministers sign. and all elders. Speaking about marriage there in chapter 24, part 3, it says this, it is lawful for all sorts of people to marry who are able with judgment to give their counsel. Yet, it is the duty of Christians to marry only in the Lord. And therefore such as profess the true reformed religion should not marry with infidels, papists, or other idolaters. Neither should such as are godly be unequally yoked by marrying with such as are notoriously wicked in their life or maintain damnable heresies. That is our confession of faith. This is the teaching of Scripture, of which the confession is simply a summary of. It is unwise, therefore, for any Christian to pursue any kind of romantic relationship with a person who is outside of Jesus Christ. While I have no doubt that God can work in the life of such a person, while I have no doubt that God can save an unsaved marriage partner by His grace. The overwhelming exhortation and examples from Scripture argue that a Christian should never enter into marriage with a person who is not a child of God. And so that brings us to consider then, who should I marry? Who should I marry? I believe the words of 1 Corinthians 7 and the verse 39 gives a guiding principle with regard to who a Christian should marry. If marriage is God's will for their life. Remember what I said when we spoke about being single? That for some people that is God's will. That is God's will for them to remain a single person. But if it is the will of God for you to marry, then 1 Corinthians 7 verse 39 gives us a principle, gives us a guiding principle as to who the person should marry. Let's read 1 Corinthians 7 verse 39. The wife is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth. But if her husband be dead, she is at liberty to be married to whom she will, Only in the Lord. Now, contextually, these words, they speak about a widow, a Christian widow. They speak about this Christian widow and her right to marry again after her husband dies, and yet there is a caveat, and this is the caveat, only in the Lord. only in the Lord. What does that mean, in the Lord? Well, it simply is a phrase that speaks to us about being a believer, being in Christ, being united to Jesus Christ by a living and by a saving faith. And only someone who meets such a condition is to be married by that widow. She is to marry only in the Lord. It is a principle. I believe that could be carried through for every child of God, to marry only in the Lord. Abraham was the father of the faithful. And Abraham was very selective when it came to the wife that his son Isaac should marry. I want to read just the opening verses of the chapter 24 of Genesis. I want to read what it says concerning Abraham. And Abraham was old and well-stricken in age. The Lord had blessed Abraham in all things. And Abraham said unto his eldest servant of his house that ruled over all that he had, Could I pray thee to hand under my thigh? And I will make thee swear by the Lord, the God of heaven, the God of earth, that thou shalt not take unto my son of the daughters of the Canaanites among whom I dwell, but thou shalt go unto my country and to my kindred and take a wife unto my son. Isaac, Abraham makes two stipulations. Stipulation one, not a Canaanite, not a heathen girl, not a pagan girl, not an ungodly girl, not an unbeliever. No, stipulation one, not a Canaanite, but one from the family, one from the extended family, one from The house from which I come from, the household from which I am derived is where you will find a wife for Isaac, one from the family. I believe the principle is set here. It could not be clearer. The covenant seed was to marry one from the same family, Isaac being the covenant seed. What is true of Abraham's physical seed is a good principle to follow for those who are Abraham's spiritual seed. Such ought to marry one who belongs to the same spiritual family, the family of God, one from the family of God. In everything in life, brethren and sisters, we want to glorify the Lord. That's man's chief end, is to glorify God and to enjoy Him forever. Paul would say that whether you eat or drink or whatsoever you do, do all to the glory of God. Whatsoever you do. Well, that really brings in everything in life, doesn't it? Whatsoever you do. Yes, eat and drink and whatsoever you do. I believe that marriage certainly falls into this category, whatsoever you do. And so in marriage, in marrying someone, the glory of God is to be very much at the forefront of your consideration. Will this union glorify God? Will it glorify God? That's the question that you need to ask. I don't believe that marrying an unbeliever glorifies God. and not bring glory to His name or to His cause. You see, to obey the Lord by marrying in the Lord will certainly be a way in which you'll be able then to glorify God. By your obedience to that stipulation, in the Lord, marrying in the Lord, you'll then bring glory to God. And surely that's what we want to do. Marry a child of God. It's a Christian, a believer. Having said before you, I trust what the Bible has to say about who a Christian should not marry and who they should marry, let me give some practical counsel in finding a marriage partner, and with this I close. When it comes to finding a husband, finding a wife, firstly be prayerful. Be prayerful. Make the matter of marriage a continual dialogue between you and your loving Heavenly Father. I want to just say those words again. Your loving Heavenly Father. That's who He is. Leave all the issues relating to marriage before the Lord in prayer. If you are to marry, who you are to marry, when you are to marry. Let Proverbs 3 verse 5 and 6 be your guide in this. As you pray, then be submissive to God's will. And if His will is not as you would want it to be, remember that your loving Heavenly Father, that He knows best, and that He has your good, and He has His glory very much in mind when it comes to every area of your life. He has promised no good thing will He withhold from men that walk uprightly. No good thing. And he gives to his people good things. And so be submissive. You maybe think, well, this is the person I should marry. And then, whenever things haven't worked out and you revisit that again, and God has given you and brought to you a marriage partner, you then realize God's wisdom in it all. He knew best. He knew best. I did not know, but he knew what was best. And so leave it before the Lord. Be prayerful. Secondly, when finding a husband and wife, be proactive. Be proactive. Proverbs 18.22, Whoso findeth a wife, findeth a good thing. and obtaineth favour of the Lord. This finding of a wife is again brought to our attention. Proverbs 31 verse 10, Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies. Solomon twice speaks about finding a wife, which suggests to me that we are to be active and not passive in the search. There's no doubt in my mind that Abraham's servant was led by the Lord within his search for Isaac's wife. But that did not negate his active participation in it. Rebekah didn't arrive on the doorstep of Isaac. Rather, there was active participation. There was the finding of the wife and being brought, and being brought to Isaac. Yes, what did he testify to Rebecca, the servant, Genesis 24, 27? I being in the way, the Lord led me. Here we have God working providentially, sovereignly, but he was in the way. He was in the way. And then being in the way, the Lord led him. As I said, your husband and wife, they're not just going to come through. letterbox. I'm not going to knock the door and say, here I am. Not going to happen that way. But can I say this and give this little caveat, young person, older person, make sure you're looking in the right places. Make sure you're looking in the right places. Make sure you're looking in the prayer meeting, the house of God and youth fellowship. Make sure you're looking in all the right places. Let me bring it to Christ. Let me bring it to Christ, brethren and sisters. The Lord Jesus Christ was proactive when He sought for His bride. The Son of Man has come to seek and to see that which is lost. He was proactive in looking for His bride, the church. Why then would it be any different when coming to look for a bride on a human level? And so be proactive. And then thirdly, be perceptive. All that glitters is not gold. I'm sure you've heard that statement. It's a statement that reminds us that appearances can be deceiving. A believer must not be taken in by outward appearances or by fair speeches of a potential marriage partner. Ask the Lord for spiritual discernment on the matter. Ask questions. Does he, does she love the Lord? Do they love the Word of God? Do they love the Lord's day? Do they love the Lord's house? Do they love the Lord's people? Do they pray? Do they talk about spiritual things? The psalmist said in Psalm 119 verse 63, I am a companion of all them that fear thee and of them that keep thy precepts. That's the kind of person you want to be aiming to be as a young Christian. You want to be a young person that fears God and keeps God's precepts. And being such a person, then you want to find somebody like that to be your companion. For that's what marriage is, companionship, partnership. We spoke about that. Do you not want to be a companion of the one who is one who fears thee and who keeps God's precepts? Be wary of being taken in by a spiritual pretender. Let me repeat that. Be wary of being, or wary of being taken in by a spiritual pretender. They'll say the right things, they'll do the right things, and then whenever marriage comes, they'll be revealed for what they are. Don't be gullible. Ask their minister. I had a man ring me one time. Not about a person in this church, but I had a man who rang me about a girl, and did I know anything about her, and about her spiritual life, and her spiritual well-being, and whether she went to church, and whether she went to the prayer meeting or not. He liked the girl, but he wanted to know about her. Do not be taken in by a spiritual pretender. And finding a husband and wife, I need to get through a few more. Be pragmatic. If you're waiting for the perfect man or woman before you marry, well, they do not exist. They don't exist. We have to be real. We have to be biblical here, brethren and sisters. A perfect man or woman does not exist. The only perfect man was Christ. Christ was the only. My brethren and sisters, that is not to say that we do not strive for perfection. Jesus Christ commands us to be perfect. in Matthew 5 verse 48. And yet we know that we'll never attain to this perfection until we are fully glorified. And so keep that in mind when you seek for a potential marriage partner, as wonderful as you think they are, the person you intend to marry is still only a sinner saved by grace. Let me ask you, did Christ find a perfect bride? When he found us, did he find a perfect bride? Thank God someday she will be perfect. She'll be a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing. You know, something else about this, pragmatism. Pragmatism should direct you away from the superficial to the spiritual when it comes to finding a marriage partner. What do I mean? You need to remember that inward beauty endures, but outward beauty fades. Proverbs 31 verse 30, favor is deceitful and beauty is vain. But a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised. To marry a person simply because of their beauty, to have some kind of truthy wife or husband on the end of your arm as you walk up the street in Portrush is short-sighted and carnal. It is short-sighted and carnal, because no matter how hard we try to reverse or to slow down the aging process, we cannot. Outward beauty will fade. I remember the story of Dr. John Vaughan and his wife. I don't have time to tell the story, but sadly. You read it in a book, More Precious Than Gold, tremendous testimony book. His little daughter went into the garage and spilled over a gasoline tank, and as a result, with the mother working in the kitchen, the fumes caught fire and engulfed the entire home. The little girl, sadly, had great third-degree burns over a large part of her body, and so did his wife as she went in to try and rescue little Becky. John Vaughan went to see his wife in the ICU unit, And between him and her, there was just a glass screen. And he looked into his wife's face, a beautiful woman, but now completely scarred, completely scarred with burns because of what she had experienced in that fire. And he thought to himself, how will I ever love her again? And then he said this, he says, I looked into her eyes, And he said, the beauty that I had saw in her eyes before was still there. She was still the same woman. Her outward beauty was taken from her, but she was still the same beautiful woman that I married. Young people, look away from the superficial and look and place the emphasis on the spiritual. To marry someone because of their wealth, their social standing, their car they drive, or the property portfolio that they have, evidence is that your criteria for the right partner in life is all wrong, because they can all be quickly taken away. Be pragmatic. And then finally, be prepared. When looking for a husband and wife, be prepared. Be prepared in two ways. Be prepared spiritually. Be prepared to be the husband and wife that God intends you to be. Be prepared. Read up. Read up on what God wants you to be as a husband and wife. Ephesians 5, 1 Corinthians 7, Colossians 3, 1 Peter 3. These are passages that speak about the responsibilities and the roles of husband and wife. And begin fulfilling those requirements as a singleton. and then be prepared practically. Couples should prepare financially for setting up home by putting away money for house deposit, furnishings, utility bills, food, cars, etc. If you intend to marry, then be wise with your present purchases. Be wise with your present purchases. If you intend to marry, Be wise with your present purchases. You'll go into your mom and dad's home and you'll look around and you'll see this beautiful furniture. You'll see all these things that your mom and dad have. And you know what, young person, you'll want to walk into a home just like that. But you need to realize that it's took your parents 30 or 40 years to gather all those things together. You need to realize that. You're not going to have a beautiful kitchen as you start out, unless God has blessed you with great finances and the best of furniture. It'll take you years to bring all those things together. But these are only things that will pass away. The home is the people there. Work on that. Work on that and not the outward furnishings, but the inward adorning of the heart. Be practical. Be prepared practically. Young men, learn from your father the practical skills that will help you in upkeeping a home. Young woman, spend time with your mother. Learn how to cook. Learn how to iron. Learn how to wash clothes. Learn how to clean. You may think, is that man serious? Is that preacher being serious? Well listen folks, who's going to cut the lawn? Who's going to change the fuse in the plug? Who's going to cook the meals? Mummy's not going to come and do it. Prepare yourself practically within the home and spend time with mum and dad. Spend time with them. Learn from them. Learn how they manage their finances. And so by the help of God, prepare yourself to be the best possible marriage partner you can be. But until you marry, seek first and continue to seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness. And all other things will be added on to you. You know, outside of salvation, Who you marry is one of the greatest decisions you'll ever make in life. Such is so important that you must make that decision in light of the teaching of Scripture on the matter. I trust that what has been said over the last number of weeks, as I've tried to faithfully present to you biblical and practical advice, and I trust that advice has been biblical, If not, then cast it to the side, but I trust it has. I trust that it will help and assist those who do intend to marry sometime in the future, and that God will bless your marriage and your home, your family. In the Lord, marry in the Lord, and then you'll have his blessing on that which you have done. And if there be that individual within the home that is not yet saved, keep praying for him, keep praying for her. God is able, God is able to unite you in Christ. Oh may He do so, even for His glory's sake. Amen and amen. Let's pray, let's bow our heads in prayer. We'll just let you go out through the door there today. Give space and time to people for them to do that, folks. And so we leave from the back row and then we make our way out via that way. So let's just do that today. Our loving Father, we commit this meeting into thy care and into thy keeping. We pray that that which has been of God, that it will endure, and that which has been of man, Oh, God, we'll be forgotten, forgotten entirely. Oh, God, bless incoming days. We pray for our young people, for those of an older age group, as they consider this most serious matter. May they not think of it lightly. May they understand the great importance of it all. It is a picture of Christ's union with His church. O gracious Father, may our marriages resemble that union. May, as the ungodly look on, may they desire themselves to be brought into that union and be brought to be part of the bride of Christ through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus. Answer prayer and part us with the blessing of the triune God, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. We offer prayer in and through our Savior's precious and worthy name. Amen and amen. May the Lord bless. Thank you.