Our next reading of God's Word in our sermon text is found in the book of Ephesians. Ephesians chapter 6, and we'll read the first four verses there. Ephesians 6, and beginning with verse 1. Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother. This is the first commandment with a promise. that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land. Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. You may be seated. Let us pray. Lord, as we come now to your word, Pray for you to attend both what we've read and it's preaching by your Holy Spirit to illumine our minds to open our eyes to behold the wondrous things that are written in your law. We pray that you would Help us to have understanding that you would give us a great, not only a growth in our knowledge of your love for us, but help us to apply that to our own lives, to mimic that in our homes and that we would, in all that we see, that we would respond appropriately with faith in your promises. If you give warnings to us that we would tremble at those threatenings, if you have given us commandments that we would follow you in obedience. We ask all this through Christ, Amen. We're taking at Ortega on the Lord's Day mornings a brief break from our study in the book of Exodus. I thought that the congregation could use a bit of a break from the book and had someone else fill the pulpit recently thinking maybe they could use a break from my voice a bit as well. But we've taken a bit of a break as we've made our halfway through the book of Exodus to the Ten Commandments and We've had regular visitors and some new members join lately and even some folks who have been members of the church for a while who still have many questions with regard to baptism. I was telling a boy's Sunday school class this morning that one of the reasons why we have so many questions regarding the sacraments is because it's like viewing a diamond from different aspects. There's so many different things that we see that of course we're going to have questions. It's not just one dimensional. And so we've been considering baptism and yet this is our third sermon. This morning was our third sermon from this text on that series in baptism out of four and we have yet to consider a text on baptism itself. Lord willing we'll do that next week and I should be here and bring that text to you as well. But what we've done so far is really sought to get behind baptism to see how we understand it. from the understanding of covenant, God's relationship with his people, seeing the sacraments in this way. So we began in Genesis 15 setting the foundation that it is the promise of God that is the basis for God's covenant of grace with man and in God's relationship with Abraham. God enters into covenant with him and we see Abraham cut these animals in pieces and Abraham has the great vision of the Lord's presence in this smoking pot and flaming torch passed through the animal pieces. We saw in that sign that what the Lord is doing here in signs that he gives has much more to do with what he is saying than what we are saying. So baptism has more to do, the Lord's Supper has more to do with the word of God than our commitment to him. Promises from God. Then we move to Genesis 17 and we saw the sign of entrance into the covenant of grace in Abraham's day and throughout the Old Testament, which was circumcision. And we saw how it correlates to baptism in the new covenant as the sign of inclusion. and how it is a better sign. No longer do we administer that sign with a knife. We don't have to worry about blood being on the carpet. But the biggest mess we're going to make is some water, perhaps too much water on a child's head or getting onto the minister's clothes or onto the floor. And so it's a better sign. It's a more clean sign. It's a more open sign, not only to male children, but to females as well. And, of course, not only to children, though we emphasize that and focus on that. And that has been a part of the aim of our understanding baptism in this brief series. And that's why we're seeing now, coming to the New Testament in Ephesians chapter 6, and as we saw over there this morning, that this principle of children being included in the covenant, in the visible church, in the community, that arena where God's redemptive purposes are ordinarily being fulfilled that in the New Testament as well this principle holds true. And so we see Paul opening chapter 6 with Butler addressing children. So what I want you to see this evening is from this passage in these few verses that we have read is that as members of the visible church The children of believers are to receive both instruction and care." As members of the visible church the children of believers are to receive both instruction and care. We'll see that in three points. We'll see first as I've already alluded to that their presence is acknowledged. We'll see secondly that their responsibility is expected and also or their obedience is expected. And then finally we'll see that their care is commanded. So their presence is acknowledged, their obedience or responsibility is expected in this covenant community and also their care is commanded as we'll see the commandment given not only to children but to their parents here as well. So first their presence is acknowledged. Several years ago, the movie Blindside was made to portray this true story of a Tennessee teenager who was adopted by an upper-class family, an African-American teenager adopted by a white family. And he went on to play college football for the Ole Miss Rebels and then was actually drafted into the NFL. And during the course of the movie, he had been living with this family for some time. And they wanted to make it clear to him their desire and their intention that they wanted to adopt this boy as their own, Michael Orr. And so they sat him down and they said to him, Michael, we want to make you a part of our family. And he looked around at this woman, her husband, their children. And having lived with him for quite some time, he responded, well, I kind of thought I already was. And he had been there for a while. So he did. He thought they had already accepted him in the family. This is often the case when it comes to children. in the New Covenant in the way that typical evangelicals understand children as being outside of the church, outside of the covenant people of God until they're able to make their profession of faith. But as we see here, Paul writes directly to children and what is striking is he writes to them just like they are to anyone else in the church. He's written to husbands, He's written to wives. He will write to servants and their masters. And here in chapter, in verse one, he writes to children, addressing them just as though they were part of the covenant community. And it's because they are. And so they are to receive the sign of inclusion, initiation into the covenant. And as those who have received that sign, they are considered as members of the visible church of Jesus Christ. Now this text finds us in this very practical section of the book of the letter to the Ephesians. Paul in this letter in chapter one has really scaled the heights theologically and in chapter two he is mine the depths of the riches of God's grace in Jesus Christ. But as it is with Paul and as it is with all of scripture's teaching. This is not just meant to puff us up with knowledge, but doctrine should lead to devotion. It should lead to a biblical piety, a living out in light of the truth that we have received. And so Paul's typical way of writing letters would include, as it does here, Doctrine followed by duty or doctrine followed by devotion. It should lead us both to praise and to obedience. And so this is what Paul is doing as he's already given in the first half of this book. He's given so much, so many riches concerning God's grace in Christ. And now he's writing to the very mundane aspects of life, the very basic structures of life. The nuclear family, parents and children here are called to obey. And so as he writes to them, we are reminded, as Solomon says in Psalm 127, that children are heritage from the Lord. The fruit of the womb is a reward. That these children are gifts, that they're blessings to be considered as blessings and not burdens. Later in Psalm 127, Solomon also says, Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one's youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them. Arrows, a quiver full of arrows. What are arrows meant for? They're not meant to remain in the quiver, are they? But they're meant to be sharpened, they're meant to be readied, they're meant to be projected, propelled towards an enemy. And so our children are being sharpened in this quiver to be sent out as those who would sharply penetrate the kingdom of darkness for the kingdom of light. And so God's primary means of building his church and advancing his kingdom is through the children of Christian parents being raised in a Christian home. And of course we know this isn't always the case that they always come to faith or that they always follow the Lord and it's very heartbreaking when they don't. But ordinarily this is God's modus operandi, this is his way of operating. So how do you view your children or the children of this church. And I do realize as well, I don't know this of anyone in particular here, but I always know that we run the risk of when speaking of family and children, I was speaking to those who have no children or who want children and haven't been able to have them or earlier in life or either they haven't been able to have children yet and they long for children. Well, how do you view other children? Children of believers, children in the church, we need to be careful, don't we, that we don't become envious if we haven't been able to have children or we don't become covetous. We don't charge the Lord with evil because he's failed to give us a blessing that we might desire and he's given the same thing that we desire to others. So be careful there but see them as blessings. Whether they are your own or whether they belong to others, the Lord has placed them in this covenant community. And they are, they are blessings. Now, we should be careful, though, that as we consider them as part of the church, that we don't run on either side, like on the ditch on either side. That we stay on the road that Scripture gives us with regard to how we understand them. So we've been talking about how we don't understand children to be outside of the church, we don't understand them to be just merely pagans until they come to faith, but at the same time we don't presume that they are elect, that they are regenerate, that they are saved. And so there's a balance here. And it might help us to think of various circles, and I know, don't press me on this because I know the analogy fails at some point, But, and they all do, but think of circles. A small circle and then a circle surrounding it, middle sized, and then a very large circle outside of that. And that very large circle is the world. That is paganism. That is unbelievers and their children. But then within that circle we might see the church. And that would include believers and also their children. Now, we don't know that those who are in the visible church, in the covenant community, even though they're professing faith in Christ, we don't know that they are truly believing, that they truly possess saving faith. We don't know the hearts. And if we don't know the hearts of adults, but we give judgment of charity, then we should do the same for our children. We don't know their hearts. But they are part of God's covenant community. They receive real benefits by being in the church. And then we have that smaller circle. The smallest. That of election. Of God's decree. Of those who do truly possess saving faith. Who are born again. But once again in the middle. The church is more or less pure. And it's going to be that way with adults and with children. But they all are in this arena. of God's saving activity where he is ordinarily bringing about his saving purposes. So their presence is acknowledged. But then also it's not only acknowledged, Paul is not just writing to them for this purpose, but he has something to say to them. We also see that their responsibility is expected. So children Here comes the imperative, obey your parents in the Lord for this is right. And then he gives them the fifth commandment. Honor your father and mother and then gives them incentive for obeying that commandment. This is the first commandment with promise. As it was said to those in Israel, that it may go well with you, that you may live long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you. And so children, If you're part of the church, if you are clothed with Jesus Christ in the sense that as Paul says in Galatians, as many have been baptized, have put on Christ and you are marked as belonging to Christ, you are part of the church, then your responsibility is expected. You don't wait until you're a certain age to begin obeying the commandments of God. But you're called to even now. And the primary way in which you do that is by obeying your parents. Honoring the Lord by giving honor to your parents and obeying them in the Lord. And we always test our children and do often and say, what if I told you to do something that God forbids? Or what if I tell you not to do something that God commands? What do you do? I'm always pleased with the answer. No, obey the Lord instead of obeying you. But Paul says here, children, obey your parents in the Lord. And so parents are, in this sense, that authority figure. They are like God to their children. And the Lord is pleased with obedient children and children are obeying the Lord through their obedience to their parents. So children, your lives should be marked By obedience, by a joyful obedience. And also, parents, we should be showing our children what joyful obedience to God's commands looks like as well. Children, you've heard me say it. I hope you maybe saw it here in the text if you can read. Or maybe you know the commandment. But the fifth commandment is to honor your father and mother It does have a blessing attached. And so your trusting in the Lord, your obedience to God's commands, your obeying of this command and honoring your parents should cause you to expect God's blessing with it. You're to look for God's blessing. That doesn't mean that everything will go your way. That doesn't mean that you'll get everything you want. But it does mean. That the Lord is with you, even when life is hard and it will be, even when things hurt and things will hurt you in this life, even when there is much sorrow and suffering, and there will be, you will be sad. But the Lord is with you. You can know that you have his blessing. You all know the story of Joseph. Many bad things happened to Joseph, right? His brothers wanted to kill him. They staged his death. They cast him into a pit. They sold him into slavery. And then as a slave in a home, he is falsely accused of doing something that he did not do and then cast into prison. It's hard to imagine it getting much worse than this. Away from his home, away from his family, all alone. But no, he wasn't all alone, was he? Because the Bible also tells us that the Lord was with Joseph. Even there, the Lord was with him. You could know that God is working all things for your good. You should expect God's blessing of your obedience, just as the children of Israel did. And it's interesting, isn't it, that there is a repetition of this commandment and its reward in the New Testament. As far as it pleases the Lord, he may give you physical prosperity, long life, literally. But in the kingdom, in the land that God has brought you into, you should expect to be growing in the grace and knowledge of Christ and to be blessed in his kingdom of righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. A greater blessing than the Israelites could have expected in that long life in that chunk of land, Palestine. But the fullness has come to you in Jesus Christ. So the responsibility is expected. And just before parents, you say amen with me as we want to. You hear that? You hear that, Jenny, right? Give her a little elbow. Obey your parents in the Lord. But just as parents are called to honor or children are called to honor their father and mother. I want to say also here that parents are called to honor their children. And I say that because Paul is expounding the fifth commandment and we understand, if you know your catechism, that Paul right here will use this most basic command, this most basic authority structure. We know that all authority is derived from God, but he's going to apply it further. And so it begins here, but it doesn't end here. He moves on in verse five to speak of servants and masters and that relationship. He tells servants how they are to obey their masters and tells masters how they are to treat their servants. In other words, there's a certain honor that is due both ways. And this is not only implied here, but we'll see it explicit that parents do have an obligation to their children. And so we're called to honor those who are made in God's image, whether they are in whatever place they're in, whether it is in authority over us as our superiors, whether they are under us as our inferiors, we have authority over them, as with the parent to child relationship, or if they are equals. But regardless of our station in life, and regardless of these vocations and our responsibilities to each other, in whatever that is, we are to show honor. as to those who were made in God's image. We should also be reminded that the honor we owe to children involves a training, a teaching, instruction. They are to learn the Bible. They are to learn our doctrine. derived from Scripture. They are to learn how to pray. They're to learn how to worship. As they grow in their education, in their knowledge of God's world, that needs to be based out of a knowledge of God's Word. Not that God's Word, that the Bible is a textbook for their learning, for their math or for their science, In another sense, it tells them everything about science and math, right? Because God is the creator, because God has created an orderly world. These things exist because God exists as the creator of it all. And so they're to be raised in this way, trained. And with regard to worshiping, we are to be training them to worship. We encourage this and I know you do as well here. that parents bring their children with them and include their children in the worship service. Of course, we want to be careful not to levy too heavy a burden on, we've seen it all too frequently that the single mom who her husband is away, he's on call at work or perhaps on deployment. And she comes in and she's worn out from the week already with many small children and she was coming to worship the Lord and she can't get a free moment. Some of the children are running about, the others are screaming and she's tending to a baby. Let's be careful, let's be patient, not to demand too much but rather to help this mother, help these parents in the Christian nurture of these children. But we should encourage, if it's possible, children to be in the worshiping presence of God with his gathered people. In scripture there are times when those who gathered could hear with understanding gathered in God's presence. But there are other times where there seems to be no distinction made between all of those in God's presence, presumably the whole people, parents with children in their arms even. And if it is true, and it is, that God's people gathered at Mount Sinai, to hear from the Lord, to gather, to be assembled in His presence. If that is true, and if it is true that we have come to something greater, and it is, not to a mountain that can be touched or to this flaming, smoking place, but rather to Mount Zion, the heavenly city, the new Jerusalem. If this is where we have gathered for worship, and we are in the presence of angels in their festal garments, if prepared for a festive worship. Doesn't sound very Presbyterian, does it? To the saints, with the saints of those who have gone on before us and have been purified, the spirits of the just men made perfect, the author of Hebrew says. To Jesus, the blood of the new covenant, and to God, the judge of all. If this is where we are gathering every Lord's day, Why would you not want your children to be a part of that? Don't you want your children in God's presence? Again, let's be patient. That doesn't mean or that may mean that they only get through the first hymn. We have to take them out and correct them and bring them back in. I remember as our oldest Camden, we were living in North Carolina. I was a youth pastor. We sat very close to the front and He was at the age where he had done pretty well. We'd had him in the worship service from the earliest days we can remember. But he was at that age where he just couldn't sit still. But he's also at the age where he didn't understand a whole lot. You could correct him right there in the moment, but we didn't want the child up front to scream and be a distraction. I remember taking him out, and Kristen, we've had another child by then, she's with him in the nursery or somewhere. So I'm taking this child out, and we get to the back, and I'm ready to discipline him, and you're really gonna get it this time. We get there and he has no idea what's taking place. So it involves training. We took time out of the service for a bit and then we speak to him. Cam, we're going to go back in. We're going to sit. We're going to listen to the preaching. We're going to sing. We're going to pray. It involves training. Training them to be worshipers of the true and living God. And parents, it is given to you to be The main instructors of your children in this way, that responsibility falls upon you. And then we've seen this implicitly, but. But now we see it explicitly in verse four. The presence is acknowledged, their obedience is expected, but then finally their care is commanded. Fathers. And this word can apply to mothers as well, but in general, but in particular, the responsibility falls upon the father as the head of the home. A sobering designation here. Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. We're taught here that rearing children involves both positives and negatives. As Jesse Pickett would say, it is okay to quote Jesse here, isn't it? I hope he listens to this. I did get this from Jesse so I want to give him credit that's due him. But this positive and negative here, don't provoke yet bring them up, reminds us that we are to be parenting with a gospel balance. That's good, isn't it? From Jesse, a gospel balance. Don't provoke your children. So there's the negative first, the prohibition. This is to say we're not to live in a way towards our children that incites their anger or wrath. And this is not to say that we don't ever cross them. This is not to say that we can control their hearts or that they won't be upset with us or upset with God's commands, right? In rebellion. But it is to say that we are to live in such a way that or we are not to live in such a way rather that that frustrates or hinders them from developing into what God would have them to be. We're not to exasperate our children. And this happens far too often. It happens when we're not clear about what we expect from them. It happens when we're unclear about what rewards or what consequences will result from certain behavior or attitudes. This happens if we're inconsistent and we demand certain standards from them that they live up to something and we fail to live up to the same standards as their parents. This happens when Every request or every question before we even hear it, we just know it's a no. I don't I don't feel like dealing with this right now. We do this, we exasperate our children, provoking them when we live as though they are less important than whatever is going on in our lives or on the television or on our phones and other devices. We may do this when we're able to put a smile on our face and to converse with everyone else. But when it comes to them, they're met with from us, they're met with an attitude of irritability and frustration. As though they really aren't as significant as others. So fathers, do not provoke your children to anger. But here's the positive, bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. The great extremes of fathers in particular is that either they rule with an iron fist, they micromanage everything or, which seems to be more common, they're too passive. They're aloof. They fit the stereotype of the incapable dunce who is a couch dweller on the television sitcoms. And my wife reminded me not too long ago when I shared my frustration, why are the men always presented in this way? They can't do anything and the mom's always the hero. She reminded me that most of the time stereotypes have a grain of truth behind it. But bring them up. This means we can't be passive, we have to be active. in nurturing them, in rearing children. They are to be reared in the school of Christ, in the nurture and discipline of the Lord. Other translations have the discipline and instruction of the Lord. So Paul is calling men here to man up and lead their families, their children, instructing them daily, reinforcing it. We read in Deuteronomy of the regular pattern of life when you walk by the gates, when you go by the way, when you lie down, when you rise up, you're to be speaking of God's commands. They're to be there always before your eyes. And so it is in the Christian home. Praying with your children, praying for your children, teaching them, sharpening those arrows and pointing them, getting them prepared to be propelled into the world. We're going to be teaching them matters that pertain to lasting things, as Paul commands us to. our thinking. So we are to teach our children to think as in Philippians. Think about those things that are beautiful, true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, commendable, excellent, and worthy of praise. Not just merely whatever transient fad that we find in popular culture. And too often our children know so much about our culture. I'm not advocating sheltering. that is naive. We live in a cruel and a sinful world and our children don't need to be just thrown out one day into the world and have to figure it out for themselves. But at the same time we teach them. We teach them what it is to follow the Lord in obedience when times are hard, when we go against the grain of what the world is is adopting and holding to. And they may know much about the world, but that needs to be regulated by scripture. It needs to have a basis and understanding that the way they view the world needs to be in light of God's word, lasting things, not merely the transient passing matters of this present evil age. So the children of believers, as members of the visible church, they're to receive both instruction and care, having their presence acknowledged, their obedience expected, their care commanded. This passage shouldn't be, it's not meant to be, a club. To beat down parents. It's not meant to be a club to beat down children. Hey, you're not obeying your parents enough or obey more. Parents do better. No. But it's an encouragement and it shows us that God is concerned with the presence and the welfare of our children. The fact that he's placed them in a Christian home shows that they are special objects of his care. And the good news is, is that our hope for these children doesn't depend ultimately on our parenting ability. Children, your hope does not ultimately depend upon your obedience, but your hope is dependent and it must be in the one who was truly obedient. who honored not only his earthly parents, but who honored his heavenly Father, of whom God the Father said, I am well pleased in this one, in Jesus Christ, who did always those things, John said, that pleased the Father. That's where your hope is. When you disobey your parents, when you disobey the Lord, where do you run? You must run to Jesus Christ. He's your only hope, but parents also for you. When you fail in parenting, and you will, Where do you run? You must also run to your heavenly father, the one who loves you continually, who pursues you relentlessly, who loves you in his son Jesus Christ. That is our hope. Jesus loves the little children. Amen, let's pray. Father, we do thank you. for how you have established the community of your worshiping people. Of those who are called by your name, who believe in you, who have come out from the world and been marked as those who belong to Christ together with their children, with their households. We thank you for your purpose, O Lord, that we see from beginning to end in Scripture, with Noah and with Abraham, with Moses and the children of Israel, with the sons of David, and even in the New Covenant Church and the book of Acts, that it is your purpose to use and to deal with and to work through households. We thank you, O Lord, for these great and precious promises that are made to us and to our children. And we pray that you would help us to rear our children In the covenant of grace under the promises of God, you would help children to be obeying their parents as they seek to obey the Lord and trusting in the promises that are given to them, signified in their baptism and proclaimed to them week after week in the preaching of the gospel and day by day in the instruction of their parents. We also pray for those, O Lord, whose children are gone out of the house or who have not have not had children themselves, that they would also seek ways to assist Christian parents in the nurture of these children towards the end of their closing with Christ in faith. We ask these things in his name. Amen.